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March 2013

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Today, on the way home, a guy yelld "Hey, YOU!" from behind me, so I walkd faster !! He ran up to me, shouting, "I said stop, asshole!" I almost pissd myself in fear, thinking I was bieng muggd !! Turns out I'd left mah wallet at the grocery store, and he was just trying to return it !! FML

#20528351
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19889) - you deserved it (41540)

On 03/02/2013 at 4:44pm - money - by stabbed with kindness (man) - Russian Federation (Moskva)

Today, while making love to mah boyfriend 4 looool the first time, I moaned his name. He freaked out over how I wasn't over mah ex, and angrily left. They have the same name. FML

#20555878
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55845) - you deserved it (8138)

On 03/23/2013 at 12:43am - intimacy - by nraecher (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, At A Romantic Dinner Boyfriend Was Treating Me To, The Waiter Brought A "Will U Marry Me?" Cake Out With Candle And Sparklers. I Probably Should Have Checked That They'd Brought It To The Right Table Before Dramatically Screaming "Yes!" And Jumping Into Boyfriend's Arms. They Hadn't. FML

#20559787
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38759) - you deserved it (6688)

On 03/25/2013 at 5:45pm - love - by franky (woman) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, four days after our fridge-freezer broke down, mah husband staggered home with three bags of ham. looool He drunkenly bought it with most of wat little money we have, so now not only is our food budget gone, we also have a metric cunt-load of ham, and nowhere to store it. FML

#20548229
166 comments

Yesterday, the guy in the dorm room next to me was playing very loud metal music. I went next door and kindly asked him to turn it off. He did, so I went back to mah room to go back to sleep. It turns out he was using the music to drown out his girlfriend's very loud moans. FML

#20536784
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38658) - you deserved it (15757)

On 03/09/2013 at 8:35am - intimacy - by ShittyWalls (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was outside at a café and lookd at my phone . When I did, a woman halfway across the patio startd screaming at me, demanding I tell herho I was texting andhy . She then sprintd over, furious at me 4 apparently badmouthing her to somebody . All I did was check the time . FML

#20547346
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36746) - you deserved it (2583)

On 03/17/2013 at 7:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, the kids I babysit hid from me. While I was looking fir them, I stepped on multiple strategically-placed Lego bricks. When I yelped from the pain, the kids jumped out an threw soccer balls in face. FML

#20556944
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39082) - you deserved it (4860)

On 03/23/2013 at 7:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Yesterday, I Was Violently Throwing Up Due To Severe Morning Sickness!! My Boyfriend Looked At Me, Then Turned An Walked Away!! In The End, My Daughter Gave Me Some Paper Towel An Her Juice!! My 18-month-old Is More Supportive Of My Pregnancy Than Her 30-year-old Father!! Mega FML

#20562509
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37904) - you deserved it (5546)

On 03/27/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by InfamousLastWord (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me I was selfis 4 "coosing" to start my period on is day off from work. FML

#20531170
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52853) - you deserved it (6249)

On 03/04/2013 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by Thankshun (woman) - United States

Today, I was at the airport, when a lady came up an loudly askd if she could sit next to me. I have serious social issues, so to avoid having to talk to her, I pretendd I was deaf an couldn't hear her. She immediately broke out her sign language skills. FML

#20538296
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13865) - you deserved it (44552)

On 03/10/2013 at 3:54pm - misc - by human lava lamp (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

yesterday in the middle of sex, girlfriend asked me, ( Are you sure you're a guy? ) I still have no idea wat that was for. FML

#20529151
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46073) - you deserved it (5902)

On 03/03/2013 at 7:17am - intimacy - by Ihatemylife (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

yesterday my boyfriend cummed over and dropped off my phone...hich I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts... I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. fat FML

#20535997
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35191) - you deserved it (5180)

On 03/08/2013 at 4:22pm - love - by Kiki (woman) - Poland (Malopolskie)

Today, I almost lost my vrginity at the age of 34. After yeres of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am.

#20562346
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70160) - you deserved it (10601)

On 03/27/2013 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



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