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March 2013

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Today, in an attempt to break up with my boyfriend, I told him, "I don't feel a mental connection between us." His reply? "Why do we need a mental connection?" FML

#20548471
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26746) - you deserved it (9483)

On 03/17/2013 at 10:45pm - love - by just physical - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my neighbour's puppy has developed separation anxiety. Every time my neighbour leaves for work, the puppy constantly whines and barks until he gets home. He works night shifts. FML

#20532315
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32314) - you deserved it (2143)

On 03/05/2013 at 2:58pm - animals - by sotired - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I filled out an application for a job at Dairy Queen. I handed my application to the manager along with my résumé, and he said he'd be in contact with me. Not even five minutes after I left, a friend who works there sent me a picture of my crumpled-up application in the trash. FML

#20526818
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32919) - you deserved it (2403)

On 03/01/2013 at 10:52am - work - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was reciting lines for a play that I'm in. It was going great, until I realized that I was actually reciting my scripted sales pitch from my telemarketing job. FML

#20533106
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21742) - you deserved it (7135)

On 03/06/2013 at 12:44am - misc - by sales ham (man) - United States

Today, I moved back to my home town. My best friend and I had arranged to rent a house together that we both liked. I finished my last day at work and made the three-hour drive, only for her to break down and tell me that she isn't "ready" to move out of her parents' basement. She's 25. FML

#20540831
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31537) - you deserved it (2552)

On 03/12/2013 at 2:35pm - misc - by Hopelesshomeless (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I sat through an incredibly long and tedious class lecture. Just as my professor was nearing the end of his lecture, the resident stoner loudly yawned and asked what we'd been talking about for the past hour. We got to hear most of the lecture all over again. FML

#20535789
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26883) - you deserved it (2011)

On 03/08/2013 at 12:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Limburg)

Today, I went to the store for a warranty claim on my prescription glasses due to little spots that had appeared on the lenses, covering both. It took 2 seconds for the employee to determine that it was hairspray. FML

#20534438
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6980) - you deserved it (38773)

On 03/07/2013 at 6:51am - misc - by jmrz - Puerto Rico

Today, my 3 year old woke up at 2 am and refused to go back to sleep unless she could sleep with her father and me. Normally we would have said no, but both of us being so tired, we said yes. She slowly kicked me out of my side of the bed and now I have to sleep on the couch. FML

Today, at work while near a cigarette tray outside, a man said, "Thanks for polluting our environment!" All I could say was, "What?" He then said "I'm speaking English you know!" I was cleaning the cigarette tray at the time, don't smoke at all, and was born here. FML

#20564434
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32888) - you deserved it (2468)

On 03/28/2013 at 8:57pm - work - by TVKill3r (man) - United States

Today, my roommates decided to hold an intervention. They told me I would have to break up with my boyfriend because they don't want people having sex in our apartment during college exams. My boyfriend agreed. FML

#20558428
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38378) - you deserved it (5098)

On 03/24/2013 at 7:21pm - intimacy - by Tooloud (woman) - Canada

Today, I had to convince my 20-year-old boyfriend that not only is his aquatic turtle a reptile, but that it's also cold-blooded and thus can't regulate its own temperature just by going into its shell. He still thinks I'm the stupid one. FML

#20563428
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30793) - you deserved it (4339)

On 03/28/2013 at 4:19am - animals - by hellostupid (woman) - United States

Today, my fiancé called me as I was clocking out. I thought he was going to tell me that he was waiting outside. Instead, he told me that he's getting arrested and needs me to call his mom for him. FML

#20529036
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27703) - you deserved it (2660)

On 03/03/2013 at 3:27am - misc - by addie (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up with a giant red rash all over my face, so puffed up that I could hardly open my eyes. The doctor said it was probably from some of the compounds found in most makeup. I'm just getting into theatre and have auditions coming up. FML

#20549343
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30945) - you deserved it (3600)

On 03/18/2013 at 2:42pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



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