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March 2013

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Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend. I was woken up by my mother breaking into my house to tell me I need to get ready for work. Then she got mad that I had a girl over. I'm 20. FML

#20561180
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37912) - you deserved it (4629)

On 03/26/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by holycommander - United States

Today, a customer came up to me and asked if I knew where the make-up aisle was. I pointed him in the right direction but he just gasped and said, "Oh so you DO know where it is!" and walked away, roaring with laughter. FML

#20562040
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34126) - you deserved it (3358)

On 03/27/2013 at 3:29am - work - by apparentlytoougly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it's my third night of finally living on my own in a house. I can't count the number of times I have run to my knife and pepper spray after hearing "suspicious" sounds. Maybe I'm not ready to be an adult after all. FML

#20550428
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28422) - you deserved it (8233)

On 03/19/2013 at 2:32am - misc - by nearly20yetasfearfulasatoddlerhavingnightmares (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend and one of his friends have been having sex with each other. His excuse? "She's my best friend, we do this all the time." I have been dating him for over a year. FML

#20532334
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43835) - you deserved it (3657)

On 03/05/2013 at 3:17pm - love - by Alexandra - United States (Maryland)

Today, my dad and I had an hour-long conversation. When he was getting up to leave my room he said, "Good talk Chelsey." My sister is Chelsey. So I corrected him. He thought I was joking. My father can't tell my sister and I apart. We are not twins. FML

#20535549
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34839) - you deserved it (2155)

On 03/08/2013 at 5:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out why my boyfriend likes to do my hair and makeup for me. Far from it being some kind of fetish or hobby, it's because he thinks I do such a crappy job that feels he has to apply it himself so I don't "embarrass" him when we're out in public together. FML

#20543666
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30629) - you deserved it (11017)

On 03/14/2013 at 5:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)

Today, on Facebook, I mentioned that I'd just finished reading the novel Pet Sematary. Two hours later, I'd lost two friends and my boyfriend, after they commented "learn to spell, dumbass", "u illiterate fucker", and "well, I'm not dating you for your brains, am I?" I hate humanity. FML

#20555478
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32598) - you deserved it (7218)

On 03/22/2013 at 8:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I attended the reading of my grandfather's will. I didn't expect to receive anything, since his side of the family had always ostracized me for being born out of wedlock. I did get something: $3,500, on the binding condition that I use a portion of it to get a vasectomy. FML

#20543737
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34641) - you deserved it (2552)

On 03/14/2013 at 6:04pm - misc - by grandson of a p.o.s. (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I finally got a tattoo of an alchemy symbol that I've wanted for years. I also found out later that symbol stands for urine. FML

#20539190
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8688) - you deserved it (45173)

On 03/11/2013 at 3:43am - misc - by PeeLeg (woman) -

Today, of the two IDs I possess, I handed the cop that pulled me over the fake one. FML

#20545967
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9710) - you deserved it (65067)

On 03/16/2013 at 10:58am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after I had changed my number to get away from my abusive ex, my mom decided to give him my new one. She insists that I need to give him another chance. FML

#20556707
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50644) - you deserved it (3068)

On 03/23/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, we started our 17 hour drive to Michigan for spring break. My mom decided to go to Target to buy some music CDs. All she bought was three Nicki Minaj CDs. She has already replayed the first CD four times. 14 hours to go. FML

#20551039
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39058) - you deserved it (3580)

On 03/19/2013 at 4:12pm - misc - by :( - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I turned 18. My parents got me a pineapple and a pair of socks. I'm allergic to pineapple, and the socks are too small. FML

#20566329
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38327) - you deserved it (2673)

On 03/30/2013 at 12:06am - misc - by ShellShocked - United States



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