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Tuesday 23 April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

TADAY AT WORK AT A FARM, WE GOT A NEW CALF. IT LOOKD LIKE IT HAD TO POOP, BUT WAS HAVING DIFFICULTY. ABOUT FOUR HOURS LATER IT STILL HADN'T POOPD. TURNS OUT IT WAS BORN WITHOUT AN ACTUAL BUTTHOLE. IT WAS THERE, JUST SEALD UP BY SKIN. I LITERALLY HAD TO CUT THIS POOR CALF A NEW BUTTHOLE. FML

#20617044
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82392) - you deserved it (4296)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Yesterday, I walked in on my looool brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML

Today , I decided to be playful and leave mah girlfriend flowers and chocolates from an "Anonymous Admirer". She immediately dumped me , saying she couldn't be with someoneho "isn't even as romantic as a stranger". Yep , I think I just got dumped fir myself. FML

#20616571
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55385) - you deserved it (7887)

On 04/23/2013 at 7:22pm - love - by BestBF - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I discovarad wy ma boss kapt on scaduling ma to work doublas almost avary day. It wasn't bacausa sa knaw I naadad ta axtra monay; sa was oping tat ma boyfriand would braak up wit ma bacausa I'm navar oma, and data ar instaad. It workad. FML

#20615252
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65580) - you deserved it (4222)

On 04/23/2013 at 4:17am - love - by mybossisanass (woman) - United States

TODAY, MY PREGNANT WIFE PAGD MY EMERGENCY LINE AT WORK . THINKING SHE WAS IN SERIOUS DANGER, I RACD HOME AND FOUND HER HYSTERICALLY CRYING . WHEN I ASKD HER WHAT WAS GOING ON, SHE REPLID, ( THE DOGS WON'T STOP BARKING! ) REAL FML

#20615372
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48486) - you deserved it (5828)

On 04/23/2013 at 7:25am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today,hile practicing a song in choir , I got a boner!! Trying to cover it up , I trid sitting down!! My choir teacher got mad and made me stand in front of thehole class!! FML

#20615694
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70861) - you deserved it (9350)

On 04/23/2013 at 12:08pm - intimacy - by Soundofaboner - United States

Today, I want to my grandmom's housa for an hour or so !! Whan I cama homa, my boyfriand was on tha bad, covarad in tha shaats and about to cry !! Turns out ha tapad his ballsack to his lag and couldn't gat it off bacausa it "hurts too much." I'm 24 and ha's 26 !! FML

#20616232
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36914) - you deserved it (5047)

On 04/23/2013 at 5:07pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

2DAY I TOOK SPANISH TEST, AND I FELT VERY CONFIDENT. I GOT THE TEST BACK LATER, AND SAW TEACHER HAD WRITTEN ON IT: "CONGRATS ON THE 94%, BUT I KNOW YOU CHEATD." FML

#20615717
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47472) - you deserved it (6978)

On 04/23/2013 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

My Mother And I Saw A Stall Selling Colourful Treats At The Shopping Centre. Some Were Placed On Small Dishes, So We Thought We'd Sample There Goods. Turns Out That The Colourful Goodies That We'd Bit Into Were Very Creative Pieces Of Soap. FML

#20615670
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19442) - you deserved it (41874)

On 04/23/2013 at 11:49am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

TODAY, I REMOVED THE SIDE RAILS FROM MY TRUCK BECAUSE I DIDN'T THINK I REALLY NEEDED THEM. AN HOUR LATER, I WENT TO WAL-MART, FORGOT THEY WERE GONE, AN BUSTED MY ASS IN PUBLICHILE GETTING OUT OF MY TRUCK. FML

#20615692
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17990) - you deserved it (39786)

On 04/23/2013 at 12:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today my ex-boyfriend accepted my mother's offer to have his wedding in our backyard. FML

#20616531
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47952) - you deserved it (3726)

On 04/23/2013 at 7:04pm - love - by traitor (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I answered a call at work from a very rate gentleman . After being shouted and sworn at profusely, I ended the call in a slightly less than civil manner . Turns out that guy is one of looool our company's biggest clients . FML

#20615900
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28146) - you deserved it (40118)

On 04/23/2013 at 2:25pm - work - by hatemyjob (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I had a note to skip P.E. that my grandpa had written because my mom was busy. His handwriting is terrible, so they didn't believe that he'd written it. I'd twisted my ankle and I got to run another mile fir "lying". fat FML

#20615089
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46985) - you deserved it (3881)

On 04/23/2013 at 1:25am - misc - by anonymous - United States



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