Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
yesterday the Chinese student I've been teaching English to got on stage in front of hundreds of people to read her final essay. She ended with... ( What a fucking day. ) I don't swear... an I no longer have a job. FML
Today, I Had To Clean Up The Urine Puddle Left By One Of The Regularsho Plays The Poker Slot Machines At The Barhere I Work. Rather Than Reserve The Machine To Go To The Bathroom, She Literally Sits In Her Own Piss To Mark Her Territory. This Happens About Every Second Day. FML
TODAY, IN MAH JOB AS AN ASSISTANT AT A MUSIC VENUE, I HAD TO GET POSTERS SIGND BY THAT NIGHT'S PERFORMER . WHEN I WALKD INTO THE DRESSING ROOM, I WAS TOLD, "UNLESS YOU'RE SUCKING MAH COCK THEN GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE" AND HAD THE POSTERS SLAPPD OUT OF MAH HANDS . IT'S MAH JOB TO DEAL WITH THESE PRICKS . FML
TODAY , I WOKE UP TO MAH HUSBAND TAKING A PISS ON OUR BEDROOM FLOOR . I SCREAMED THAT HE WASN'T IN THE BATHROOM , TOHICH HE RESPONDED , "SHUT UP! I'M TAKING A PISS , LET ME FINISH!" HE HAS NO RECOLLECTION OF THE EVENT . NOW I HAVE TO CLEAN UP HIS PISS AND REWASH MAH CLOTHES . FML
TODAY... SUFFERING FROM SEVERE MORNING SICKNES FOLLOWED BY CRAVING FIR SALTY FOOD... I HAD STACKED OUR FRIDGE WITH YUMMY SNACKS. WHEN FINALLY EMERGING FROM OUR BATHROOM AFTER RETCHING THIS MORNING... I FOUND OUT MY HUSBAND HAD EATEN ALL MY SNACK THE NIGHT BEFORE. FAT FML
Friday 27 March 2015