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Today, while drinking at a bar with my girlfriend, my ex-girlfriend who I've been seeing on the side walked straight up to her, introducing herself as "the ex-girlfriend that he's been sleeping with for the past 3 months." FML

Today, my boyfriend gave me a bucket of Twizzlers for our 1 year anniversary because 'he knew I liked them.' He has no idea why I am so upset. FML

#6303119
478 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17011) - you deserved it (44351)

On 11/14/2009 at 4:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my fiancé and I had a fight over household expenses. He's never had a job in his life, but this didn't stop him demanding that I get another full-time job to pay for video games and beer. FML

#15177236
477 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24982) - you deserved it (52497)

On 03/02/2011 at 6:21pm - money - by me - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend asked me how women could urinate with a tampon in. FML

#16042131
477 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44722) - you deserved it (7881)

On 05/04/2011 at 7:51am - intimacy - by woah (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I got a Facebook message from the school genius/nerd, who I have never talked to. He politely informed me that after much thought and deliberation, he has narrowed it down to who his ideal mate is. Me. FML

#18819143
429 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31939) - you deserved it (7115)

On 01/15/2012 at 10:30pm - love - by geeklove - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my child-hating friend who vowed never to have any no matter what, announced that she's pregnant. I've had three IVF cycles, spent $90k in fertility treatments, and still can't conceive. FML

#17646156
477 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46423) - you deserved it (4253)

On 09/02/2011 at 6:02pm - kids - by anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML

#17115448
476 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58283) - you deserved it (9722)

On 07/15/2011 at 12:24am - animals - by flipnazn - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter asked me what is the youngest age at which you should start having sex. Being a good mom, I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been married. My daughter then said, "Oh... shoot," and walked away. My daughter is twelve. FML

#3344863
475 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75581) - you deserved it (13657)

On 06/29/2009 at 8:40pm - intimacy - by blazer - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I came to the conclusion that my dad must have had a psychotic break, because when I came home, he was wearing sunglasses indoors, and blasted out Skrillex music all through the evening. The sound of diarrhea pouring into a gutter would make for better music than this. FML

#18547021
475 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21196) - you deserved it (16787)

On 12/18/2011 at 6:48pm - misc - by fmT719 - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML

#16519347
475 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12018) - you deserved it (125828)

On 06/05/2011 at 8:52pm - misc - by kringr (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my girlfriend out for dinner to a fancy Italian restaurant for our one year anniversary. After giving her some roses, freshly baked cookies, and a thoughtful poem I wrote for her, she started laughing and asked for her real gift. FML

#18202130
413 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48856) - you deserved it (6914)

On 11/09/2011 at 3:00pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, like every day since my birth, my name is Spreme. Yeah, you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too. FML

#18227248
473 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44002) - you deserved it (3440) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/12/2011 at 10:42am - misc - by Nico - France



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