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Today, I met a close friend of my husband for the first time. She told me it was amazing that I agreed to be in an open marriage and asked if sex was weird knowing he'd slept with other women. No, the sex wasn't weird, because we're not in an open marriage. FML

#6067617
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26943) - you deserved it (1990)

On 10/30/2009 at 5:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, the guy I was seeing put candles all over his room to make things romantic. As we were getting it on, a plastic bag caught fire next to the bed. He had the brilliant idea to wave it around to put it out. Burning pieces of plastic landed on my arm. FML

#6045813
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16740) - you deserved it (2740)

On 10/28/2009 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by LadySteph12 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I had a date in my dreams. It was a pity date, with someone who is already taken. I can't even get a real date in my dreams. FML

#6433676
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26403) - you deserved it (3461)

On 11/24/2009 at 5:49am - love - by Lonely (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my apartment complex added $250 to the $1,000 my roomate and I already owe because of an unauthorized pet and complaints from neighbors that our dog barks all night long. We don't have a dog, we don't even have a pet. FML

#6542379
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29468) - you deserved it (2101)

On 11/30/2009 at 10:22pm - money - by cande (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boyfriend and I were using our skype accounts for the first time. He went to the restroom and I thought that I'd surprise him with my clothes off for when he came back. I heard him walk back into the room so I got into position. It wasn't him. It was his mom. FML

#6806655
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7369) - you deserved it (19981)

On 12/18/2009 at 3:25am - intimacy - by Jssceli09 (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I work at a debt collections center and I had to call my own father. Merry Christmas. FML

#6931953
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25814) - you deserved it (2272)

On 12/25/2009 at 12:16am - work - by kat (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was trying to be dirty with my fiancé. He got really into the roleplaying and wouldn't stop pretending to be a cop for hours. Mood officially killed. FML

#7103612
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14969) - you deserved it (3667)

On 01/02/2010 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by uhhggggg - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was dumped at the surprise party I threw for my boyfriend. FML

#7353752
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34179) - you deserved it (2551)

On 01/15/2010 at 3:49am - love - by TanjinaRubbaiyat (woman) - Bangladesh (Dhaka)

Today, I auditioned for a part in a play. I've been practicing for months, and was very excited. After I finished singing, the director whispered something to the other judges, and they all laughed. Hard. So much for the lead role. FML

#13881545
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20571) - you deserved it (2960)

On 11/17/2010 at 9:31pm - misc - by embarrassed -

Today, I was taking the bus back to my university campus, having left work early feeling sick. While on the bus I started retching. I managed to hold it in for a while, but as I stood up to get off the bus, I started puking through my mouth and nose. This was in front of twenty other passengers. FML

#14153644
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24906) - you deserved it (2548)

On 12/10/2010 at 12:21pm - health - by pukathlon - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, at the job I've had for eight years, I finally got the raise I was supposed to get a year ago. One hour later I found out the store was closing and we were all out of a job in two weeks. FML

#14549466
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24360) - you deserved it (1880)

On 01/12/2011 at 12:09am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had to get my picture taken for a badge at the hospital. My sister came home and told my parents that she'd had a horrible day at work. They showed her my "hysterical" badge picture to cheer her up. FML

#19025712
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18841) - you deserved it (2363)

On 02/08/2012 at 10:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I frantically chased a customer down the parking lot, because they had left their package at my register. Only to find out that the whole time I was chasing the wrong person. FML

#17678735
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20492) - you deserved it (3960)

On 09/06/2011 at 5:32am - work - by Anonymous - United States



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