Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I listened to my voice mail messages for the first time in months. One was from my Grandma that must have been meant for Gramps. I think I know now why my mother has so many siblings. FML

#5502939
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19701) - you deserved it (1653)

On 09/27/2009 at 8:52am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I had my first job interview in years. While I was waiting for the manager to come out I realized I had forgotten the resume that I had printed out the night before, since he specifically asked me to bring one. FML

#5825013
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7030) - you deserved it (23464)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:45am - work - by jzone32 (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I decided I'd take a nap in my car because I got to work very early. As I was waking up from my nap, I saw a cop looking right at me. Turns out, a lady who'd parked her car right next to mine after I was asleep had called the cops on me because she thought I was dead. FML

#6046125
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27060) - you deserved it (3853)

On 10/28/2009 at 9:09pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was having lunch with my mom before an important job interview. She commented than my lips looked dry and crackly and gave me her chapstick with aloe to put on. Apparently I'm allergic to aloe and my lips got so swollen I could hardly talk. It was too late to reschedule the interview. FML

#6719258
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23600) - you deserved it (2030)

On 12/12/2009 at 4:28am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got an email from the Law School Admissions Council saying that they received my request for my LSAT cancellation and they are confirming that it has been cancelled. The email also said the score will not be reinstated for any reason. I never requested for my score to be cancelled. FML

#6751692
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27068) - you deserved it (1751)

On 12/14/2009 at 12:20pm - misc - by dahlia87 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, formal portraits of my entire class were posted online, with about five photos per person. As my mom was looking at them, she was commenting about how pretty all my classmates look. When she got to my photos, all she had to say was "ugh". FML

#7222160
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20463) - you deserved it (2096)

On 01/08/2010 at 7:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was driving through my neighborhood when I heard a siren. I looked into my rear view mirror and saw a motorcycle, so I pulled over. The motorcycle drove by, and it turned out to be an old lady with a leather jacket. The siren was in a song on the radio. FML

#13163125
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7379) - you deserved it (23931)

On 09/22/2010 at 10:29pm - misc - by joshualover (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, at work, I was told I was a failure. Feeling like crap, I went to my best friend to see if he could make me laugh. He told me that he felt obligated to hang out with me, so he thought that we shouldn't anymore. FML

#14847489
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24283) - you deserved it (2900)

On 02/05/2011 at 12:58am - misc - by ohhhjaymo13 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with an elderly customer at work. I had to spend 10 minutes listening to him describe how the underwear he bought was too tight and caused his bladder to leak. FML

#14913113
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23410) - you deserved it (2427)

On 02/09/2011 at 7:41pm - work - by spiderchick23 (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my parents invited my Muslim boyfriend over for dinner for the first time. My mother made sure that everything including the salad had pork in it. FML

#19465353
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33301) - you deserved it (6682)

On 04/14/2012 at 7:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, my pregnancy test came back positive. The only way I could have gotten pregnant is from having gotten drunk and sleeping with my ex. We broke up because I didn't want children. FML

#18088166
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11181) - you deserved it (48572)

On 10/27/2011 at 11:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Shropshire)

Today, I lent my brand new earrings to one of my friends. Everyone told her that they are pretty, and look really great on her. I've been wearing them for the last 3 weeks, and no one has ever mentioned them. FML

#713
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20057) - you deserved it (1955)

On 01/05/2009 at 10:27pm - misc - by sel2207 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mom asked all the old ladies in her church to pray that I meet "someone special". FML

#1104
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19796) - you deserved it (1747)

On 01/14/2009 at 9:26am - love - by beekie9 - United States (Illinois)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: