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Today, at work, the prizes were given to the employee of the month. They come in to surprise the winner and give prizes. They come over to my cubicle and cover me with silly string. Jokingly, I said: "Do you guys have the wrong cubicle? " They did. The guy in the next cubicle won. FML

#1497553
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49552) - you deserved it (6055)

On 04/30/2009 at 5:42pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, after a long day of working on my feet, I came home looking forward to soaking my aching feet in a foot spa. When I was pulling the machine out of a closet, it slipped and came crashing down on my feet. It broke. So did three of my toes. FML

#1842367
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47163) - you deserved it (3898)

On 05/11/2009 at 1:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, I left home to start my new life at University. Saying goodbye to my mother, the last thing she said to me was "Don't turn gay". I'm gay. FML

#5562367
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48197) - you deserved it (9999)

On 09/30/2009 at 5:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I was on a tram and I noticed an older lady having trouble getting down the stairs. I immediately got up to help her, dropping my bag on the seat accidentally. As I went to get back on the tram, the doors closed. FML

#5543779
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31368) - you deserved it (4810)

On 09/29/2009 at 5:43am - misc - by arghh (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my electricity went out. The electric company said it was because the bill was at least 4 months overdue. Apparently, I have been paying for my roommate to go out and party for weeks. FML

#5790955
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30839) - you deserved it (3472)

On 10/12/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I noticed that I've been spelling my company's name wrong in my email signature for over a year. FML

#6027287
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6953) - you deserved it (38741)

On 10/27/2009 at 6:24pm - work - by nobodyreadsmyemails (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mother had 'the talk' with me about sex. I spent the entire time confused as to what brought this up, until she mentioned she had found a used condom in the backseat of the car. I haven't had any action in it, and have no idea whose it was. FML

#5784290
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19260) - you deserved it (1789)

On 10/11/2009 at 9:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that being rhythmically challenged really really sucks. I was trying to dance around sexily for my girlfriend, and I was doing that one move where you thrust your pelvis forward, and swing you hand from side to side. I hit myself in the nuts. FML

#5460176
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6513) - you deserved it (21801)

On 09/25/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by Dumbfuck (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was frustrated at work so to have fun, I wrote an email to myself saying that I was great and loved myself and should relax. I used all different colors and fonts. Instead of hitting "delete", I hit "print" without realizing. My manager got it out of the printer and put it on my desk. FML

#5658558
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8425) - you deserved it (34264)

On 10/05/2009 at 6:49am - work - by Me (woman) - Kuwait

Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML

#5449988
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23650) - you deserved it (2042)

On 09/24/2009 at 4:57pm - intimacy - by Madison43097 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was trying to sneak up my husband while he was playing a computer game. As I was getting behind the chair, he paused the game and sat up straight. I stopped. He turned around and sneezed violently and blew a bunch of snot into my face and eyes. FML

#5477011
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27350) - you deserved it (17218)

On 09/25/2009 at 11:47pm - health - by snottyface (woman) - United States

Today, I was taking the bus to work and it was a rather bumpy ride. The child sitting across from me asked her mom if her chin moves like mine when the bus goes up. FML

#5949212
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21776) - you deserved it (5914)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:40pm - misc - by mandy (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I finally received a paycheck for the first time in six months. I celebrated by promptly falling down a flight of stairs and losing consciousness. FML

#6422914
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23747) - you deserved it (4543)

On 11/23/2009 at 5:12pm - work - by DBR (man) - United States (New York)



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