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Today, I was walking to the bus stop. I saw a chunk of ice and attempted to kick it. Sadly it was frozen to the ground, so I fell, broke my toe, and missed the bus. Even the bus driver was laughing as he drove by. FML

#6969489
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10824) - you deserved it (25187)

On 12/27/2009 at 3:43am - misc - by Icy (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized why my husband had been seemingly wanting to improve our relationship by sending little texts throughout the day for the last couple of months, asking what I was doing. It was so he could find out when would be the best time to have his girlfriend over and cheat on me. FML

#7365064
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34521) - you deserved it (2391)

On 01/15/2010 at 8:22pm - love - by woundedexwife (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up and went to go have a shower. The trouble is, my bedroom door is broken and will no longer open. My mother's idea of helping was pushing a note under the door saying she'll be back in a couple of hours. FML

Today, I went on a blind date. We were walking in the park and I noticed a funny smell. I looked down and realized I stepped in dog crap. I tried to nonchalantly rub it off on the grass, but instead hit a patch of wet grass and slipped onto my butt, right into a pile of goose poop. FML

#7314783
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27930) - you deserved it (3909)

On 01/13/2010 at 3:07am - love - by Juanna (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized I'd rather be constipated, sick, sit in long traffic lines and inadvertantly eat spoiled meat than spend another day at my shitty job. All things that happened to me today. FML

#8840296
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20023) - you deserved it (2402)

On 03/05/2010 at 3:01am - work - by Petergibbons - United States (California)

Today, it was very windy and snowy and the neighborhoods garbage cans were blowing everywhere. I had already brought mine in and I saw my neighbor's being blown away. Thinking I'd be nice, I went out to pick it up. Just before I could however, the wind smashed it into me and I fell on the ice. FML

#7674410
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20829) - you deserved it (2725)

On 01/29/2010 at 1:59pm - misc - by Dana (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my friend's van ran out of gas on an expressway off-ramp. After pushing it to the shoulder, we walked to a gas station and got a can of gas. We got back to the van to find that the battery had died from leaving on the lights and hazards to avoid an accident. FML

#13218546
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20713) - you deserved it (6643)

On 09/27/2010 at 1:56am - misc - by stranded (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I hadn't been out in two weeks, and I was looking forward to going to the beach with my friends. Instead, I rear-ended someone at a roundabout and had to go home. FML

#10664484
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8899) - you deserved it (19599)

On 05/21/2010 at 6:11am - misc - by CARnage (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got a call from my grandmother saying she locked her keys in the car and I needed to bring her the spares. After an hour bus ride, involving me missing my stop and getting temporarily lost, I arrived and handed her the keys. I brought the wrong ones. FML

#12023647
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14693) - you deserved it (27082)

On 07/21/2010 at 12:09pm - misc - by Syrinth (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out a guy I work with has an eye twitch. I thought he was just a winker. I have been winking back all week. He either thinks I'm an asshole or am trying to seduce him. FML

#14105864
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11361) - you deserved it (19546)

On 12/06/2010 at 9:38am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had all of my wisdom teeth removed. After the anesthesia wore off, I asked how long the procedure took, and the nurse told me a little less than an hour. Apparently I thought this was hilarious and started laughing, which ripped my new stitches. FML

#15051482
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26029) - you deserved it (4904)

On 02/20/2011 at 12:04pm - health - by bouncekitty - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend decided it would be fun to sit on my lap. In the process he landed on me so hard that he made me hit my head. Then when he turned around his elbow smacked into my nose causing it to break. FML

#14530558
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25880) - you deserved it (2770)

On 01/10/2011 at 5:35am - health - by dinosaur - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend moved. He moved from my room... to my housemate's room. FML

#14616202
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28918) - you deserved it (3136) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 5:50pm - love - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins



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