Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after pulling up to my girlfriend's house for dinner with her parents, one of my favorite rock songs begin to play on the radio. After my 3 minutes of air drumming, I look up to see my girlfriend and her parents bouncing with laughter. FML

#13260803
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8573) - you deserved it (30130)

On 09/30/2010 at 6:33am - misc - by PhilDavisDied? - Sent from mobile version

Today, my entire region received record rainfall, with torrential downpours all day and night. Today was also the day I discovered my car's sunroof leaks, when I was greeted with two inches of standing water in my floorboards. FML

#13151203
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19682) - you deserved it (2163)

On 09/22/2010 at 12:14am - misc - by waterlogged - United States

Today, my dad, who lives hours away, called and told me he was getting married. Today. As in this evening. Guess I'm not invited. FML

#13672466
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26404) - you deserved it (2093)

On 11/01/2010 at 6:15am - love - by Googlebug - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got diarrhea while on a trip with my daughters. At our third stop, I had to sit in the stall listening to my 5 year-old informing everyone who came in that "mommy is stopping at EVERY bathroom to poop." FML

#14493785
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25179) - you deserved it (2946)

On 01/07/2011 at 3:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I painted an area I had carefully sanded, cleaned, and taped off. I pulled a fan out of the closet to help dry it faster. I turned the fan on, and a million dust particles flew off onto the wet paint. FML

#15124646
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11204) - you deserved it (26954)

On 02/26/2011 at 8:57am - misc - by Carmen - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got married and I'd invited everyone from work including my boss. His way of congratulating me was to mention that I'm out of a job. He said it was a good time to do it because he thought I would be too happy or too drunk to care. FML

#14784693
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29798) - you deserved it (2392)

On 01/31/2011 at 4:28am - misc - by freckleboy422 - United States (California)

Today, I had a piano exam. My friend noticed how nervous I was, and recommended that I compliment the examiner for higher marks. When it was time for the exam, without thinking, I told him I liked his hair. Turns out bald people don't like that. FML

#20046479
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6453) - you deserved it (22540)

On 08/28/2012 at 4:38pm - misc - by p (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I dyed my naturally-blonde hair dark brown. Upon seeing me, my boyfriend immediately wanted to have sex, because I now remind him of his favourite porn star. FML

#20413704
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40798) - you deserved it (13735)

On 12/22/2012 at 12:56pm - intimacy - by brunetteshavemorefun (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my mother accused me of stealing pills; she looked all over my room and couldn't find them. When she went back to the pantry, she saw them on the shelf below where they were supposed to be. She then accused me of putting them there while she was searching my room. FML

#20594384
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40563) - you deserved it (2440)

On 04/15/2013 at 6:11pm - misc - by MyLifeSucks (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I came back to my apartment after moving most of my stuff out. Upon returning, I learned that my now ex-roommate drank all of my alcohol and threw away my things, thinking that I had forgotten them. FML

#20764102
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36257) - you deserved it (3385)

On 07/04/2013 at 9:32pm - misc - by uvagirl - United States

Today, I got a speeding ticket. I couldn't find my insurance card, and the cop was very nice. He said not to worry about it, that I "looked like someone who had insurance." I'm not sure how to take that. FML

#20847276
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37530) - you deserved it (6696)

On 08/21/2013 at 12:40am - misc - by Beegee (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I tried to get my golden retriever to stand in front of our church for a very short time to illustrate the point of a sermon. When I brought my dog up, he mounted the pastor's leg and began humping him. FML

#20873553
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36131) - you deserved it (8700)

On 09/08/2013 at 9:42pm - animals - by sillydoggy - United States

Today, I tried to catch a train to get to my new job. I was stopped and told that I needed a pre-purchased ticket to enter the platform. The only way to get the ticket, they said, was by buying one on the platform. I arrived by taxi nearly an hour late for my first day. FML

#20916500
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35726) - you deserved it (3520)

On 10/11/2013 at 2:22pm - work - by sharkiewarkiemoosey (woman) - Switzerland (Ausser-Rhoden)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: