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Today, I got stuck for a while in a hallway between two security doors due to a malfunction. I'm not claustrophobic, but I sure am sensitive to horrifying smells coming from a nearby bathroom stall. FML

#18906586
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19530) - you deserved it (1821)

On 01/25/2012 at 10:50am - work - by replik - Russian Federation

Today, my dad told me it would be fine to use the mounting tape he'd bought to place paintings up in my newly painted room. I did, but after deciding I wanted to move a painting and pulling it off the wall, the wall came with it. Back to square one. FML

#19392434
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15692) - you deserved it (5128)

On 04/01/2012 at 11:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, there was a knock on my apartment door. It was the man from next-door, who sarcastically asked if I was alright, because he said he heard me screaming in agony. I was singing. FML

#19682010
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17576) - you deserved it (4063)

On 05/26/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by MALICEG - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was babysitting, playing hide and go seek. I tried to jump behind the armchair, but it tipped, and I hit my head into the wind chimes, ripped the curtain rod from the wall, and smashed my knee into the wall. I lay on the ground in agonizing pain as the little girl shouted, "I know where you are!" FML

#19608555
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17677) - you deserved it (5330)

On 05/11/2012 at 7:16pm - kids - by jessye1182 - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend told me to text him when I got home to let him know I'd made it home safe. He said if I didn't, he'd assume that aliens had abducted me and that he'd get a new girlfriend. He was completely serious. FML

#20070673
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18243) - you deserved it (3211)

On 09/13/2012 at 7:38pm - love - by TaffyMichele (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a job babysitting two really sweet kids. When their parents left, they told me that their cat had died. I told them how sorry I was, to which one of them replied, "That's okay. We still have him in a box. Wanna see?" FML

#20123166
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19945) - you deserved it (1748)

On 10/18/2012 at 9:57pm - kids - by Jessica - United States

Today, I received a drunken prank call from a girl I didn't know around 1am. I don't know what's sadder, that I carried out the conversation for 30 minutes, or that this was the first girl to call me in over a year. FML

#20087914
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19926) - you deserved it (2462)

On 09/25/2012 at 9:38am - misc - by badluckryan - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I called my dad, because I haven't spoken to him in a while, and I wanted to invite him to my graduation in May. When he picked up, I said, "Hey, how have you been, dad?" He scoffed, "Wrong number" and hung up the phone. FML

#20197219
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25435) - you deserved it (2631)

On 12/09/2012 at 1:43am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out that my son told my daughter at some point that "real" name for Hershey's Kisses is "blowjobs." I found this out because at kindergarten she was asked what her favorite food was. The teacher wasn't happy when she called me. FML

#20452458
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31493) - you deserved it (2658)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:51pm - kids - by Grant - United States

Today, after hours of trying to put a screaming baby to sleep, she finally fell asleep in my arms. I was so happy. Then, I got the hiccups. FML

#20456464
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29506) - you deserved it (2383)

On 01/13/2013 at 1:15am - kids - by hiccups - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me he wanted to learn Korean before Spanish. Apparently, being able to sing along to Gangnam Style is more important to him than being able to speak with my family. FML

#20453278
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35227) - you deserved it (6900)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:24am - love - by Latina (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was the last person in line for going on the bus. Incidentally, I was right behind a guy way taller and wider than me. When he got on the bus, the bus driver immediately shut the door behind him. I was left outside chasing after the bus. FML

#20462065
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30896) - you deserved it (2037)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, after three years with my boyfriend hardly ever going to any social or public event with me due to his social anxiety, I got to witness him improve his flirting skills on every girl available at his house party. FML

#20549117
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32436) - you deserved it (3744)

On 03/18/2013 at 10:17am - love - by social anxiety my a** (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)



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