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Today, my wife pressed a button in the elevator and quickly ran out, leaving me in there with my crying baby. When the elevator arrived at the floor, the doors opened on a wedding reception. The doors couldn't have taken any longer to close again FML

#21276854
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35112) - you deserved it (3222)

On 10/13/2014 at 11:42am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was staying in my family friend's house in France. The church bells ring every hour, which I thought was cute. Until 8 this morning where they rang 24 times. FML

#21245620
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31602) - you deserved it (3687)

On 08/26/2014 at 3:48am - misc - by hellangelrose - France

Today, my boyfriend tried to rid me of my hiccups. As he'd screamed at me and I'd pissed my pants, I just burst into tears. FML

#21279967
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29110) - you deserved it (3341)

On 10/17/2014 at 4:12pm - health - by catt - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I asked my teacher how old he was, and jokingly I said, "50?" Then he chuckled, so I laughed and said, "I was kidding… 42, 43, 44?" He then looked at me and said, "Are you trying to guess my age, or your grade percent in this class?" FML

#21315734
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19568) - you deserved it (24779)

On 12/11/2014 at 6:13pm - work - by IHateSchool-.- - United States

Today, I realized that my dog is a pro at pooping directly in shoes. FML

#21257810
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34645) - you deserved it (3601)

On 09/13/2014 at 11:38pm - animals - by new dog - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out first-hand that the most horrifying sight you can ever witness is two morbidly obese people getting nasty with each other in a dance club's run-down, public restroom. FML

#21316146
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28515) - you deserved it (4134)

On 12/12/2014 at 11:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alaska)

Today, I woke up to the lovely sounds of goats having escaped their pen and climbed onto the roof. Again. FML

#21318538
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24036) - you deserved it (2423)

On 12/16/2014 at 1:42pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my dad told me someday I'll find a man who wants a nice lumberjack for a wife. FML

#21279635
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31226) - you deserved it (3016)

On 10/17/2014 at 4:14am - love - by axewoman -

Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML

#21232320
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33561) - you deserved it (11252)

On 08/08/2014 at 3:40am - love - by alisaav (woman) - Thailand

Today, I popped into the shower hoping to come out all warm and clean. Something was very wrong with the pipes, and I came out smelling like sewage instead. FML

#21315541
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26610) - you deserved it (2536)

On 12/11/2014 at 11:09am - misc - by ohray - Turkey (Ankara)

Today, a cop car was tailing me. I was scared, and trying to avoid any tickets, I drove straight through a huge pothole rather than swerving to avoid it. The cop pulled me over and insisted I was intoxicated, because "anybody in their right mind would've dodged that pothole." FML

#21302094
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31026) - you deserved it (6052)

On 11/19/2014 at 1:44pm - misc - by limpdick9 - United States (California)

Today, my mom threw away a bag of tiny parts belonging to a $1,700 robot. Naturally, I figured this out at midnight and had to spend 30 minutes digging through three nasty trashcans overflowing with rotten food and spiders. The bag was dripping with what looked like cheese by the time I found it. FML

Today, I left my desk to go to the bathroom. I arrived back at my desk to a large package of SlimQuick packets. Guess my coworkers think I need to lose weight. FML

#21291592
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27694) - you deserved it (3011)

On 11/03/2014 at 10:38pm - work - by blondieforlife - United States (Wisconsin)



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