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Today, I was riding my bike back to my house. Suddenly I was hit by something in the head. I looked down to see a lemon on the ground and looked up to see a guy yelling at me in a car that was passing. He was yelling at me because I got in the way of the house he was throwing it at. FML

#6525806
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22635) - you deserved it (2575)

On 11/30/2009 at 12:01am - misc - by Lemonhead (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I saw my favourite shirt on the floor of my dorm's bathroom. Feeling too lazy to bend down, I used my feet to "flick" the shirt up. Apparently, some drunkard took a dump on the floor and used my shirt to cover it up. I now have shit all over my feet, hands and the wall in front of me. FML

Today, the girl I had a crush on for the past few months called me and wanted to tell me something. Excited, I agreed and we went out to dinner. She wanted to tell me she had been secretly seeing 'someone' for the past six months. FML

#6733753
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21620) - you deserved it (3055)

On 12/13/2009 at 2:36am - love - by Anon (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was unloading things into a hotel. As I went to get a bag out in the hallway, the room door closed and I had no key. When I knocked and asked my family to let me back in, no one answered. The doors are clearly not soundproof. I could hear them debating whether or not to let me back in. FML

#6945734
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22867) - you deserved it (3394)

On 12/25/2009 at 8:50pm - misc - by RoxahTheGreat (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went for a job briefing, and after that was told to do some editing for them. When I asked the person whether I was paid for the day, she laughed and said no. She was serious. FML

#8606116
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16176) - you deserved it (2310)

On 02/24/2010 at 12:19am - work - by synn - Singapore

Today, I found out my reward for topping three of the four employee performance charts was a paycut. FML

#7010601
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19731) - you deserved it (1596)

On 12/29/2009 at 6:42am - work - by Stumanji (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized why my husband had been seemingly wanting to improve our relationship by sending little texts throughout the day for the last couple of months, asking what I was doing. It was so he could find out when would be the best time to have his girlfriend over and cheat on me. FML

#7365064
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32644) - you deserved it (2253)

On 01/15/2010 at 8:22pm - love - by woundedexwife (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up and went to go have a shower. The trouble is, my bedroom door is broken and will no longer open. My mother's idea of helping was pushing a note under the door saying she'll be back in a couple of hours. FML

Today, my friend's van ran out of gas on an expressway off-ramp. After pushing it to the shoulder, we walked to a gas station and got a can of gas. We got back to the van to find that the battery had died from leaving on the lights and hazards to avoid an accident. FML

#13218546
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17290) - you deserved it (5939)

On 09/27/2010 at 1:56am - misc - by stranded (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I hadn't been out in two weeks, and I was looking forward to going to the beach with my friends. Instead, I rear-ended someone at a roundabout and had to go home. FML

#10664484
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8342) - you deserved it (18566)

On 05/21/2010 at 6:11am - misc - by CARnage (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got a call from my grandmother saying she locked her keys in the car and I needed to bring her the spares. After an hour bus ride, involving me missing my stop and getting temporarily lost, I arrived and handed her the keys. I brought the wrong ones. FML

#12023647
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13999) - you deserved it (26055)

On 07/21/2010 at 12:09pm - misc - by Syrinth (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out a guy I work with has an eye twitch. I thought he was just a winker. I have been winking back all week. He either thinks I'm an asshole or am trying to seduce him. FML

#14105864
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9059) - you deserved it (13493)

On 12/06/2010 at 9:38am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had all of my wisdom teeth removed. After the anesthesia wore off, I asked how long the procedure took, and the nurse told me a little less than an hour. Apparently I thought this was hilarious and started laughing, which ripped my new stitches. FML

#15051482
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24819) - you deserved it (4764)

On 02/20/2011 at 12:04pm - health - by bouncekitty - United States (Illinois)



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