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Today, as I was coming out of the ladies' room, I saw a guy glancing at me. A few minutes later, I saw him coming at me at a fast rate. I decided to run from him. As I got out of the building and into a cab, I saw him from the window waving my phone at me. He was just trying to return it. FML

#5410009
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9783) - you deserved it (45665)

On 09/22/2009 at 3:36am - misc - by georgiana072 (woman) - Philippines (Benguet)

Today, I went out drinking with my friends. At the end of the night I got a cab ride home. I must have passed out because when I woke up I wasn’t at my place, but my parent’s house, which is the address on my license…120 miles away. The fare was $220. FML

#5223643
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14152) - you deserved it (43830)

On 09/13/2009 at 4:12am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend brought me to his place to meet his parents. When they saw me, they laughed. FML

#5661944
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44479) - you deserved it (3779)

On 10/05/2009 at 1:29pm - misc - by omfgmaya - Denmark (Vestsjalland)

Today, my boyfriend decided it would be hot to get it on in the gym storage room at school. Apparently so did my Chemistry and Drama teachers. FML

#5131831
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29255) - you deserved it (7241)

On 09/08/2009 at 6:08pm - intimacy - by TRAMATIZED (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I learned why my bathroom has a horrible, seemingly irremovable stench. My cat doesn't squat to pee like a normal cat. She stands up, peeing over the side of the litter tray all over the wall and floor, which are now a permanent yellow tinge. FML

#6078345
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26433) - you deserved it (5200)

On 10/31/2009 at 12:34am - animals - by catwoman (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my coworkers decided to play a game of "Who Can Piss the Boss Off the Most". I opted not to play, but I still won. FML

#3956685
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48696) - you deserved it (5522)

On 07/22/2009 at 5:09pm - work - by PokeTheBear (man) - Canada

Today, I was at work and my mother texted me. The text read, "You take a nice picture." To which I responded, "what picture?" I then got a reply saying, "The one on your speeding ticket showing you going 73 in a 55 mph zone. You are even smiling." FML

#5337998
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10095) - you deserved it (44137)

On 09/18/2009 at 7:28pm - misc - by asdfas (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was leaving the mall. I Instinctively hit the unlock button on my car keys from across the parking lot. Little did I know I was making it a whole lot easier for the guy breaking into my car. FML

#4297641
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44837) - you deserved it (12961)

On 08/05/2009 at 12:13am - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it was the last day of camp. I told my friends we should exchange e-mail addresses so we could stay in touch. Apparently, they all had already exchanged their contact info. Nobody asked me for one piece of my contact info even once during the entire six weeks. FML

#4754419
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33811) - you deserved it (4492)

On 08/23/2009 at 3:09am - misc - by Lonely (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend, who is a dog trainer, was telling me all about the techniques she uses at work. I commented on how the dogs must be stupid to fall for such simple tricks, to which she replied "They worked on you." FML

#5203249
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11816) - you deserved it (45041)

On 09/12/2009 at 8:00am - love - by TrainedBF (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was hanging out with my best friend. I have been getting explicit texts and phone calls so I just joking said to my friend, "I think someone wrote my number on a bathroom stall." At which point he said, "Sorry, I didn't think people really called those numbers." FML

#5227356
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42297) - you deserved it (3387)

On 09/13/2009 at 11:57am - misc - by Casden (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I stretched really hard when I woke up, only to feel something twang. This was followed by a really sharp pain. Thinking I'd given myself a hernia, I got up to check myself in the mirror, and was repulsed by the bulge I saw hanging out of my gut. Then I realised it was just my own flab. FML

#4903195
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10332) - you deserved it (39165)

On 08/29/2009 at 10:15am - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, I tried to wake my husband up in the middle of the night by kissing him deeply and massaging his neck and shoulders. He opens his eyes, looks at me, says "No", and goes back to sleep. FML

#5306041
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20718) - you deserved it (14314)

On 09/17/2009 at 12:42am - intimacy - by turnoff (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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