Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was so bored I began practicing an irish jig. For two hours. FML

#14847206
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10017) - you deserved it (23652)

On 02/05/2011 at 12:29am - misc - by Youdontneed2knowmyname - United States (California)

Today, I was going through the history on my computer. Apparently, while I was at school my mother used my computer, and I now know my mother wants to learn how to make her breasts look larger, amongst other things. FML

#14794678
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26007) - you deserved it (3435)

On 02/01/2011 at 8:05am - intimacy - by LonelyBoy (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I tickled my girlfriend, and her first reflex was to swing her elbow back and break my nose. FML

#15281927
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15219) - you deserved it (30713)

On 03/12/2011 at 5:53am - misc - by Nerrh - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while driving, I slowed down and made sure I safely went by a pedestrian, and in the process rear-ended the car in front of me. FML

#19133346
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7637) - you deserved it (18368)

On 02/21/2012 at 6:56pm - misc - by me (man) - United States

Today, I went with my beautiful fiancée to tell her Grandmother, who's a bit senile, that we were engaged. Her response: "I know he's very nice, but think about the chubby little ugly children he'll give you". This was followed by a recollection of her ex-boyfriends who would've fathered attractive kids. FML

#15616826
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31768) - you deserved it (2909)

On 04/03/2011 at 3:33am - misc - by Joe (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I sprained my sternum in my rugby match. I now can't yell, laugh, cough, inhale or exhale fully, or sneeze without a sharp pain shooting through my chest. I have a pollen allergy, and sneeze every 5 or 10 minutes. FML

#15674369
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38248) - you deserved it (3778)

On 04/07/2011 at 12:17am - health - by ouchiee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, someone had the unique opportunity to be able to say to me, "Excuse me, your pants are on fire." FML

#17270186
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27564) - you deserved it (4975)

On 07/26/2011 at 5:22pm - health - by smokin (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I bought a Halloween costume for my cat. FML

#17544670
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8672) - you deserved it (37509)

On 08/22/2011 at 2:04am - animals - by vishuzzbabe77 - United States

Today, I received a coupon for a special offer including flights and accommodation for the honeymoon destination that my fiancé and I are keen on. Yesterday, I paid the full price for the flight tickets and hotel deposit for the honeymoon. FML

#19362332
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21374) - you deserved it (2179)

On 03/28/2012 at 6:47am - money - by honeymooner (man) - South Africa (Eastern Cape)

Today, I was trying to convince my husband to not trim the lower branches of my favorite tree. After pleading my case, I turned around and ran smack into one of said branches. My face and my dignity still hurt. FML

#19636760
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7769) - you deserved it (18404)

On 05/17/2012 at 12:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boss and I were preparing a lunch order for a nearby real-estate agency. I noticed that the order was riddled with spelling mistakes, so I laughed and mocked the realtors calling them stupid and incompetent. My boss then pointed out that the order was written in his handwriting. FML

#16340964
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8963) - you deserved it (35664)

On 05/25/2011 at 9:55am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Tasmania)

Today, after being laid off for over a year, I got turned down for an unpaid internship. I can't even get people to let me work for free. FML

#16561616
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29246) - you deserved it (3080)

On 06/08/2011 at 12:10pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, at the DMV, I was told to push my forehead against a vision testing device on the counter to activate a blinking light. When nothing happened, the employee started yelling for me to push harder. I tried again, only to knock the whole thing into her. FML

#16745803
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26570) - you deserved it (2870)

On 06/19/2011 at 1:51pm - misc - by sabadaba - United States (Arizona)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: