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Today, I was wondering why my home smelled so weird, until I found out that my 4 year old son had been secretly scattering around food he didn't like to eat throughout the house. How did I find out? No one else in this family leaves half eaten spinach all over my underwear drawer. FML

#7254333
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24526) - you deserved it (3525)

On 01/10/2010 at 5:45am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while getting gas, a hottie pulled-up to the pump next to me. I finished filling my tank and started to drive away. As I was checking her out and paying no attention to my driving, I ended up taking the front bumper off her car with my truck. FML

#7366734
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4524) - you deserved it (34237)

On 01/15/2010 at 9:25pm - misc - by mah (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I found out that you need to clean your car more often when you find a mouldy burrito under the back seat. FML

#7560337
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4975) - you deserved it (31204)

On 01/25/2010 at 12:19am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, after wondering why I've never met my father, I asked my mom if I was the product of a one night stand. She replied with, "Well, technically he didn't spend the night." FML

#13927499
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30224) - you deserved it (3355)

On 11/21/2010 at 6:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, at work I asked a woman how she was doing. When she replied, I didn't understand her, and instead of asking her what she said, I just replied with, "oh that's good." What she told me that I didn't understand was that her husband had just died. FML

#13383180
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8798) - you deserved it (29366)

On 10/09/2010 at 8:51pm - work - by fistpumpin4life - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized that I hadn't seen my video camera in a while. After searching for several minutes in my room, I remembered that I had given it to my dad to hide before our month long trip (so even if someone broke into the house the video camera would be safe). He's forgotten where he hid it. FML

#12715799
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22948) - you deserved it (8787)

On 08/24/2010 at 3:25am - misc - by lostvideo - Israel (Yerushalayim)

Today, I was at work, nonchalantly spinning my keys around my finger when they flew off and hit a glass cabinet. Broken glass showered passing customers. I don't think I'll have a job to go to tomorrow. FML

#16359885
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22190) - you deserved it (18499)

On 05/26/2011 at 5:26pm - work - by kernewek (man) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, after doing a graveyard shift at work, I took the bus home. I fell asleep on the way and woke up 25 miles away from my bus stop. I took another bus heading back and couldn't stay awake. I then woke up where I started from. FML

#10707019
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30919) - you deserved it (13094)

On 05/23/2010 at 3:29am - work - by Around - United States (Florida)

Today, I talked to my crush for half an hour. It wasn't until I was home that I realised I had some remains of the sausage roll I ate an hour earlier spread all over my teeth. FML

#12860469
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24740) - you deserved it (7945)

On 09/01/2010 at 9:26pm - love - by Rollymouth - Sent from mobile version

Today, I finally felt well enough to take an actual shower after having surgery on my back. It took five minutes to stand up, ten minutes to get to the shower, and another ten minutes to get in. The pilot light went out in less than five minutes. FML

#14732721
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24832) - you deserved it (2185)

On 01/27/2011 at 3:24pm - misc - by brrrr that's cold! - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to my parents' place to visit. My ex-boyfriend's photo is on the fridge, but there aren't any photos of my husband or any of our wedding photos. FML

#13167101
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30376) - you deserved it (2684)

On 09/23/2010 at 5:59am - misc - by annoyed - United States (California)

Today, I was helping my Dad pick up the pieces of bark that came off the tree that we'd just cut down. I bent over to grab a dark looking piece of bark. Turn out it was my dogs crap. Fresh, warm, moist piece of crap to be exact. FML

#13363790
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24744) - you deserved it (8175)

On 10/08/2010 at 8:08am - animals - by themanzz - Canada (Ontario)



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