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Today, I read that egg whites make a good hair treatment. Everything was going fine until, without thinking, I turned the hot water on to wash it out. I'm still picking the cooked egg out of my hair. FML

#21129302
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25288) - you deserved it (33249)

On 05/03/2014 at 12:57am - misc - by EggHead - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my friend sent me a link to a "horrible" tattoo that he found online, that a guy had gotten at my tattoo parlor. FML

#21133162
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36407) - you deserved it (9102)

On 05/07/2014 at 10:55am - misc - by Bad Artist - United States

Today, as I was standing in line at the checkout, the elderly guy in front turned around and said quietly to me, "Sometimes I shit my pants." He then nodded grimly and turned back around, hitting me with the full force of the stench now coming from his pants. FML

#21158187
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42591) - you deserved it (3653)

On 05/31/2014 at 12:39pm - health - by half-dead in CA (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend suggested we try something new and spontaneous. Excited to find out first-hand what she had in mind, and ready to fool around, I hurried over to her place. Turns out she's just taken up vegan cooking. FML

#21133708
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34669) - you deserved it (5977)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:01pm - misc - by veggiedude - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of my boyfriend finally giving me an orgasm, I had an anxiety attack, which caused him to have an attack of his own. I guess there is such a thing as having too much in common with your partner. FML

#21146226
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51750) - you deserved it (6855)

On 05/20/2014 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, we went to the wedding of one of my friends. As she was about to throw her bouquet, my boyfriend muttered that if I tried to catch it, we'd be through. FML

#21182017
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42284) - you deserved it (5102)

On 06/20/2014 at 3:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend kept jiggling my fat rolls while we were cuddling. I was annoyed, and I told him he could at least go for my boobs instead. He instantly replied, "But these are bigger..." FML

#21293369
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35003) - you deserved it (7626)

On 11/06/2014 at 12:14pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML

#21209203
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40269) - you deserved it (6023)

On 07/14/2014 at 7:48pm - love - by KaiyaOtaku1 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was mowing my grandma's lawn when I was suddenly swarmed by bees. When my grandma saw me covered in stings later on, she said, "Oh yeah, there are tons of bees in the grass! Be careful!" FML

#21274044
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32635) - you deserved it (2226)

On 10/09/2014 at 2:51am - health - by bees - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had a volleyball game, and we were down by 13 points. I looked up at the crowd, and my mom was shaking her head in disappointment. When it was my turn to serve, I aced them, and tied the score. When I looked up she was gone. She'd left. When I got home, I heard how I sucked for an hour. FML

#21260940
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39767) - you deserved it (2402)

On 09/18/2014 at 9:56pm - misc - by Lexi801 - United States (Utah)

Today, I decided to splurge and get valet parking at a fancy restaurant. I got out of the car and gave the man my keys and watched as he slowly backed my car into another car. FML

#21319039
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32571) - you deserved it (3099)

On 12/17/2014 at 8:33am - misc - by seriously - United States (Illinois)

Today, I learned that when you're talking about your girlfriend's 6'4", 250 lb dad in a negative way, you should really make sure he isn't around first. FML

#21295068
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17929) - you deserved it (34881)

On 11/08/2014 at 10:38pm - misc - by jlong9071 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

#21225439
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40296) - you deserved it (4654)

On 07/31/2014 at 1:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)



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  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

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