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Today, I noticed a stray string on a seam of my pants. I started absentmindedly pulling at it thinking maybe I could pull it off. Five minutes later, I realized it looked like I was fiddling with my crotch in the middle of Starbucks. FML

#20582655
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28070) - you deserved it (10073)

On 04/09/2013 at 8:02pm - misc - by WearingSomethingStringy (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, when I was talking to my younger brother, he suddenly said "Oh, I was supposed to tell you that there's this girl who has a huge crush on you!" I asked who and he answered, "I totally forgot her name, that was like 2 months ago." FML

#20589493
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45024) - you deserved it (5152)

On 04/14/2013 at 3:28am - love - by MissedTheBoat (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my whole family made an hour-long drive to a restaurant that's just a few minutes away from my place. I wasn't invited. FML

#20626789
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42303) - you deserved it (2858)

On 04/28/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by lonesome - Canada

Today, I was hanging out with a guy I really like. I let him use my phone, forgetting about the messages I'd sent about the consistency of my bowel movements. FML

#20619233
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27759) - you deserved it (13129)

On 04/24/2013 at 8:16pm - misc - by public pooper - United States

Today, I got into a car crash, in my own garage. FML

#20643761
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20064) - you deserved it (39166)

On 05/05/2013 at 7:51pm - misc - by LilaTheGreat - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML

#20707414
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40544) - you deserved it (13008)

On 06/05/2013 at 12:03pm - animals - by SHIT-BREATH (man) - United Kingdom (Monmouthshire)

Today, I was looking forward to my only day to sleep-in this month while I'm balancing school and work. I was rudely awakened at 6 am by my sister and her friend trying to make pancakes, burning them, and setting off the fire alarm in my house for half an hour. FML

#20720351
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40190) - you deserved it (2492)

On 06/11/2013 at 9:16pm - misc - by Elephant1718 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I returned home from a two-year trip overseas. My mom's first words as she greeted me at the arrivals terminal of the airport were, "Your father and I are getting a divorce." FML

#20738269
52 comments

Today, I helped an elderly lady put a bookshelf in her car. She then thanked me by hitting me with her car as she drove out of the parking lot. FML

#20736007
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35945) - you deserved it (2623)

On 06/19/2013 at 9:09pm - work - by anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom is convinced that my cat is the reincarnation of Vincent van Gogh. Why? He sleeps under my sunflowers and is a ginger tabby cat. FML

#20854246
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30729) - you deserved it (2485)

On 08/25/2013 at 9:16pm - animals - by KatVanGogh (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I showed up at my brother's house for a visit. Little did I know, there was a family gathering. My bestfriend was invited and I wasn't. She's "more fun and less awkward" than I am. FML

#20864835
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34978) - you deserved it (2851)

On 09/02/2013 at 5:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I started my new job. Only after I met my new boss did I realise I've met him before. He was at my friend's party last month, the only time in my life when I got so wasted that I danced on a table before puking on myself. He remembers me, too. FML

#20886598
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38366) - you deserved it (10110)

On 09/18/2013 at 2:31pm - work - by Anoymous (woman) - Slovakia (Bratislava)

Today, while driving in the car with my father, he handed me his iPhone and asked me to Google "Is ObamaCare good for our country?" As soon as I typed in "Is", the first result was "Is olive oil good for anal." FML

#20942318
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51287) - you deserved it (4096)

On 11/02/2013 at 9:21am - intimacy - by justme - United States (Ohio)



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