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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I went to pick up my dog from the vet after she had surgery. I somehow managed to lock my keys, my purse, and my dog in the car. FML

#13482616
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9956) - you deserved it (20407)

On 10/17/2010 at 4:13am - animals - by baddoggy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my deranged co-worker sent me a text message containing a picture that she just took of her uncle. It was his funeral. FML

#9083154
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19891) - you deserved it (1634)

On 03/14/2010 at 8:20pm - misc - by thanatophobia - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized that the only time I've ever been noticed by my classmates is when I brought cake for the potluck. FML

#14133320
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21247) - you deserved it (2890)

On 12/08/2010 at 4:55pm - misc - by Invisible - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I attempted to be nice and hold a door open for a person in a wheelchair. He hit the button to open another door. While I pointed out that I would hold the door for him, I realized that the door I was holding open for him led down some stairs. FML

#13227031
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9459) - you deserved it (30771)

On 09/27/2010 at 8:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boyfriend was talking to me on the land line when his cell phone rang. He told me to wait "two seconds" while he talked to a classmate. Their "two second" conversation lasted ten minutes, and now I can hear the French Open on the TV in background. He forgot he was talking to me. FML

#10913904
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22849) - you deserved it (3901)

On 06/01/2010 at 10:34pm - misc - by chiclet - Sent from mobile version

Today, it was my boyfriend's birthday. After spending a reasonable amount of cash to get us a nice hotel room to celebrate, he decides he would rather spend the night drinking with his friends. They all threw up in the bath tub before passing out on our bed. FML

#12836034
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25774) - you deserved it (4012)

On 08/31/2010 at 8:46am - love - by kp - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was eating out at a restaurant downtown with my brother in-law when I told him I couldn't eat any more. He then told me, "You better, or you're walking home." He wasn't kidding. FML

#13919732
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22181) - you deserved it (3018)

On 11/21/2010 at 12:31am - misc - by Random Person - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boss walked in and said something I didn't quite hear, but my co-worker chuckled so to be polite, I laughed with him. They gave me some weird looks. My boss was actually talking about his wife's tumor and my co-worker was coughing. FML

#14471297
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10695) - you deserved it (30614)

On 01/05/2011 at 2:41am - work - by sucks (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML

#14225014
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6478) - you deserved it (25707)

On 12/16/2010 at 3:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was able to land a nice apartment solely based on the fact that my puppy is potty trained. During the required pet interview, my dog 'got sick' and defecated all over the apartment office. I now have to clean the mess knowing that I will not be allowed to live there. FML

#14339155
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21274) - you deserved it (3649)

On 12/25/2010 at 9:29pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got off work and checked my makeup in the mirror once I got in my car. I had a huge piece of spinach on my front tooth that no one told me about. I work the front desk of an upscale hotel and have been greeting guests all day. FML

#14575299
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22834) - you deserved it (4797)

On 01/14/2011 at 5:11am - work - by embarassed (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, some of my classmates brought cupcakes to celebrate my birthday. I took the leftovers with me after class, and when my mom picked me up from school, she asked, "What are the cupcakes for?" FML

#14542119
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29534) - you deserved it (2323)

On 01/11/2011 at 4:17am - misc - by bdayboy (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that in conclusion to working five nights in a row, I'm scheduled to work the night shift on Valentine's day with my ex-boyfriend. FML



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