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Today, my boyfriend decided to be romantic and literally sweep me off my feet... directly into a door frame. Now my face is bruised, and the police officer at my school has asked me if I need to make a report about anything. FML

#6332669
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23813) - you deserved it (2019)

On 11/16/2009 at 8:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was waiting at home for a phone call. While I was in the bathroom, the phone rang. I quickly stopped my business and ran out of the bathroom with my pants by my ankles. I leaped over the couch, tripping and then stubbing my toe while hopping to the phone. It was a telemarketer. FML

#6211440
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21219) - you deserved it (12487)

On 11/08/2009 at 12:50pm - misc - by lauren_rox (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I received a call offering me a job with the census bureau. I applied for this job 6 months ago while I was still fighting tooth and nail to stay where I was. Since I didn't get the job, I was evicted from my apartment, got on public assistance, and moved from North Carolina to Florida with my mother. FML

#6245909
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25128) - you deserved it (2119)

On 11/10/2009 at 6:04pm - work - by GillyPirate (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, it was my 17th birthday. I didn't want my family to spend money on a cake, so my dad made this delicious apple ring. At least, it was great until my mouth began to itch and my throat closed. I have been allergic to nuts since birth, and my dad put walnuts in my birthday cake. FML

#6114128
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35108) - you deserved it (2224)

On 11/02/2009 at 1:12am - health - by UnluckyJulie (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was informed by my boss that he has been stealing quarters out of my change bowl to pay for his bus rides. He makes six times the amount I make. FML

#6274623
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30840) - you deserved it (2062)

On 11/12/2009 at 4:40pm - work - by JBK06262009 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was shopping at the grocery market and was next in line. Behind me was a woman who only had two items, so I nicely let her in front of me, as it looked like she was in a hurry. When she was all rung up, she decided to pay her $16.45 in loose change which needed to be counted out. FML

#6510411
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29270) - you deserved it (5706)

On 11/29/2009 at 8:49am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I saw a my neighbor being mugged on the street. I wanted to help, so I tried to yank her purse from the mugger's hands. I guess my neighbor didn't see me clearly, because she thought I was another mugger and kicked my directly in the happy sacks. FML

#6452828
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27911) - you deserved it (3054)

On 11/25/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my friend found a picture of herself on a website filled with pictures of thin people. I was in the picture, also. I was crossed-out with the word, "EWW" written next to me. FML

#6532310
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29189) - you deserved it (3849)

On 11/30/2009 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me because I was "letting myself go". When I told the little girl I babysit in the afternoons why I was so upset, she looked at me for a moment before saying, "Well, I definitely can't blame him." FML

#6716772
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25092) - you deserved it (7475)

On 12/12/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had a job interview at the bowling alley. The manager was busy and asked if I could wait. Let's just say I've never bowled before, and I wanted to know how deep the hole was on the bowling ball. The interview ended with him spitting on my finger, trying to get it out. FML

#6739900
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5809) - you deserved it (28246)

On 12/13/2009 at 4:31pm - work - by bowler (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was pulling into a parking garage space and using the next car over to judge where the wall was in front of me, but ended up whumping my front bumper as I pulled forward. Wondering what had happened, I got out to see that the car I was aligning myself against had hit the wall too. FML

#6703564
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7340) - you deserved it (22350)

On 12/11/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I got a call from my local hospital's emergency room, stating my wife was in labour. My wife and I split years ago, but just haven't divorced. She is telling everyone I am the baby's father, my current girlfriend is 7 months pregnant with my child. FML

#6863042
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21676) - you deserved it (8415)

On 12/21/2009 at 10:23am - intimacy - by johnG (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was sitting at the bar of a popular local restaurant. I sat there for a few hours and drank my sorrows away with the bartender. I thought she was pretty, and decided to give her a large tip. The tip sent me over my credit card limit, and the bartender is not single. FML

#7117686
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6779) - you deserved it (30285)

On 01/03/2010 at 1:36am - misc - by halien1982 (man) - United States (Ohio)



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