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Today, I fell asleep while watching an action movie. My newly installed surround sound system scared me so bad that I fell off the couch and smashed my face on our coffee table. FML

#17171472
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27078) - you deserved it (11899)

On 07/19/2011 at 12:43am - misc - by nataliepaige - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking down the street, when a car started cruising alongside me. I looked over, annoyed, at which point the driver started screaming obscenities and telling me that I'm "gonna get it" for "betraying" him, before angrily speeding off. I'm too scared to even sleep now. FML

#19044019
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24051) - you deserved it (2504)

On 02/10/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by Saw (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I went to the doctor for a check up, having had a head injury a week ago and suffering some memory loss. Turns out, the medicine he gave me for my head has memory loss as a side effect. He then said "I told you. Don't you remember?" After I said no he said "I figured." and giggled. FML

#18424721
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30356) - you deserved it (2662)

On 12/04/2011 at 2:04am - health - by memoryloss (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, it was my first day as a vacuum salesman. While I was demonstrating how well it removed stains, I managed to smear stuff over the area I was cleaning. So not only was I unsuccessful in removing the original stains, I left them with worse carpet than when I got there. FML

#18451587
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10332) - you deserved it (27109)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:29am - work - by JB - United States

Today, I was so bored at my job as a receptionist that I actually got excited when the phone rang. FML

#18067160
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25607) - you deserved it (3293)

On 10/24/2011 at 9:33pm - work - by anonymous - United States

Today, I went to the DMV to get my license. I almost ran over my evaluator as he was walking to get in the car. FML

#18960427
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10272) - you deserved it (23140)

On 01/31/2012 at 12:17pm - misc - by baddriver (man) - United States

Today, I discovered that you can't always assume your little brother is kidding when he says that you have a spider on top of your head. FML

#19099040
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25647) - you deserved it (5640)

On 02/17/2012 at 7:43am - kids - by thatoneperson - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got denied a job. They told me I was unreliable because I didn't show up for my third interview. This is the same interview they called and cancelled this morning. FML

#19025988
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28182) - you deserved it (1930)

On 02/08/2012 at 11:53am - work - by abrooks88 - United States

Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML

#19873141
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21800) - you deserved it (2429)

On 06/30/2012 at 9:00pm - misc - by pissed off -

Today, after 5 months of unemployment and hardcore job searching, I got hired for my dream job. I called my mum to tell her all about it, to which she responded, "Great honey! Now all you need to do is lose all that weight". She allowed me all of 4 minutes of feeling good about myself. FML

#19676513
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24158) - you deserved it (2841)

On 05/25/2012 at 12:32am - misc - by daddyowl - Canada (Quebec)

Today, it was the first time I was going to fly first class. I ended up in the bathroom almost the whole flight with diarrhea. FML

#19650597
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25599) - you deserved it (2172)

On 05/20/2012 at 6:21am - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, a lady threw a coke bottle at my head because she had a non-winning lottery ticket. FML

#19939674
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28003) - you deserved it (2124)

On 07/15/2012 at 1:51am - work - by kerensa (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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