Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was told by my girlfriend that in the thralls of my drunken haze last night, I tried to French-kiss her mom. FML

#14590525
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8708) - you deserved it (33542)

On 01/15/2011 at 3:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by way of making me an account on an online dating site. He then emailed me the account information and left. FML

#15308003
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32208) - you deserved it (3057)

On 03/14/2011 at 1:22pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I spent my remaining cash on a doctor's visit, only to find out that at the age of 22, I'm getting major health problems brought on by stress. I came home to relax, only to find out my roommate can't pay his rent, and needs me to cover for him so we don't get evicted. FML

#15090648
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29764) - you deserved it (2557)

On 02/23/2011 at 1:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I told my boss I was too sick to come to work. He asked if I had a late night so I told him I stayed in. Apparently I ran into him at a bar last night and was too drunk to remember it. FML

#15647734
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8938) - you deserved it (52127)

On 04/05/2011 at 3:30am - work - by randa -

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my family. Everything went well until my mum started hitting the brandy. While kicked back in her chair, she asked my boyfriend how satisfactory I was in bed, and if he enjoyed going down on me. FML

#14742735
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33632) - you deserved it (3237)

On 01/28/2011 at 12:23pm - intimacy - by bittenbyadonkey (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I bought something special at Victoria's Secret, then sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic for 2 hours to get to my boyfriend's house. When I got there, he broke up with me. We're 37 years old and he actually gave me the "it's not you, it's me" speech. FML

#14645700
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29406) - you deserved it (2969)

On 01/20/2011 at 12:04am - love - by singleladynow (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I found a horde of ants in one of my socks when I put it on my foot. FML

#15012053
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30458) - you deserved it (4583)

On 02/17/2011 at 1:50am - misc - by YeahItsmecoolhuh (woman) - United Arab Emirates

Today, I thought I'd take my little sister to the park. After getting bored of playing on the climbers, she thought it would be funny to throw some mud at me; too bad mud wasn’t the only chunky brown stuff on the ground. FML

#15341897
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29069) - you deserved it (3510)

On 03/16/2011 at 8:50pm - kids - by Abeille (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my house got broken into for the third time. The nice police officer said that if I didn't want my house to keep being robbed I should "Fix the place up so it doesn't look like a crummy vacant building." FML

#15031237
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24435) - you deserved it (8057)

On 02/18/2011 at 8:06pm - misc - by rachel - United States (California)

Today, I made my young niece lunch. After she claimed to have eaten it all, she wanted to go out and play. I was putting my shoes on when I found part of the sandwich I made her stuffed in my shoe. FML

#15784060
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24519) - you deserved it (4454)

On 04/14/2011 at 1:35pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that the peaceful rain I'd been listening to all night was really a broken water-main flooding my entire yard. FML

#16309963
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32277) - you deserved it (3817)

On 05/23/2011 at 6:17am - misc - by elle -

Today, it's been three days since my husband got into free-jazz. He plays all the time in our small apartment. Loud. It's like listening to three guys build a shed for 10 giant angry wasps. FML

#18387801
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20174) - you deserved it (2496)

On 11/29/2011 at 8:53pm - misc - by Geraldine - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, I was moving to the city with all my belongings when the trailer came unhitched, breaking the chains on my dad's homemade trailer. I then watched as the trailer narrowly missed a guardrail, went down a hill and into a river. My dad still won't admit he didn't latch the hitch. FML

#15350791
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29468) - you deserved it (3889)

On 03/17/2011 at 11:11am - misc - by johnsj8 -



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: