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Today, I helped an old man with his groceries, because he was struggling and he had a cane. After, I was nice enough to drive him home. He went to thank me by giving me a kiss on the cheek. Then he stuck his tongue out, and tried to French kiss me. FML

#6402525
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36251) - you deserved it (5770)

On 11/22/2009 at 8:53am - misc - by mjperfetti84 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, it was my 17th birthday. I didn't want my family to spend money on a cake, so my dad made this delicious apple ring. At least, it was great until my mouth began to itch and my throat closed. I have been allergic to nuts since birth, and my dad put walnuts in my birthday cake. FML

#6114128
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37894) - you deserved it (2441)

On 11/02/2009 at 1:12am - health - by UnluckyJulie (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got fired. By my father. He wants me to drive him to work tomorrow. FML

#6517705
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30581) - you deserved it (3100)

On 11/29/2009 at 6:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was taking a placement test for the new college I am going to. After the test and picking up a few numbers, I left with great pride. I opened the door and started walking out. I then realized that I had walked into the closet. FML

#6632044
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9611) - you deserved it (24556)

On 12/06/2009 at 9:58am - misc - by Wrongdoor (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got a call from my girlfriend of 13 months. She told me that she had gotten chlamydia from the guy she cheated on me with, and that I most likely have it too. I gave her a diamond ring, she gave me chlamydia. FML

#6694429
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28992) - you deserved it (2531)

On 12/10/2009 at 2:00pm - intimacy - by Godi (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my grandpa was wearing flip flops and white socks. He entered my restroom, and the moment he did it, I realized there was no toilet paper left. I felt too ashamed to interrupt his dump, so I waited for him to ask for paper, he never did and came out without socks. FML

#6695644
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30619) - you deserved it (5085)

On 12/10/2009 at 4:03pm - misc - by dayum (man) - Mexico (Chihuahua)

Today, I fainted and woke up in a hospital. My mom drove me to the emergency room. The doctor said I had a panic attack. What did I have a panic attack from? Bidding on ebay. FML

#6713073
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10480) - you deserved it (27913)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:31pm - misc - by graospe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I sneezed seven times in a row. That's the closest thing I've had to an orgasm in months. FML

#6838088
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20376) - you deserved it (3728)

On 12/19/2009 at 11:13pm - intimacy - by omglifee (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I noticed a girl looking at me on the train. Playing it cool, I decided to give her a smile and see what would happen. It came out as a creepy, seedy grin, prompting her to call security. FML

#6953786
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24326) - you deserved it (9296)

On 12/26/2009 at 7:06am - misc - by creepyguy (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my mom and I had to shovel our driveway after an epic snowstorm that left us with 22 inches of snow. We only needed to dig out my mom's car and not mine. After we did all that work and shoveled all the snow onto the side where my car was we found out my mom had a flat tire. FML

#6872316
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24845) - you deserved it (3040)

On 12/21/2009 at 8:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, after secretly smoking for more than 2 years, I decided to quit. I come home from work and I see my wife holding a pack and asking me what was it doing behind the toilet seat. FML

#7157355
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6125) - you deserved it (37628)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:55am - misc - by tanksfan (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, I heard that there's a rumour going around that I was caught masturbating while crying at a party after the girl I liked got with someone else. FML

#7946481
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22821) - you deserved it (3001)

On 02/06/2010 at 7:28pm - intimacy - by anon - United Kingdom (York)

Today, while at work, my boss asked me to clean the bathroom. Someone pooped on the floor and I stepped in it, dropping my manager's keys into the toilet. I then had to clean up my shoe and the floor and put my hand in the toilet to get the keys. FML

#7643965
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28943) - you deserved it (3402)

On 01/28/2010 at 3:12pm - work - by sucksssssss - Sent from mobile version



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