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Today, I was told I've secured the job I applied for at my local hospital. Being just 19, this is a great opportunity, and I told my parents. They angrily asked if I'd applied just to get access to drugs, then demanded to know how I'd managed to pass the drug test. Thanks for the confidence. FML

#20538687
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32737) - you deserved it (2543)

On 03/10/2013 at 9:51pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I pulled a muscle in my arm from eagerly scratching off a lottery ticket. No, I didn't win anything. FML

#20576976
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24948) - you deserved it (15198)

On 04/06/2013 at 12:59am - health - by Kotoko (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband told me to look for a honeymoon resort, since we had to cancel it last year. I looked everything up and got all excited. Just when I asked him for payment information, he said "April Fools!" April Fools was two days ago. FML

#20573157
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36034) - you deserved it (3028)

On 04/03/2013 at 12:50pm - love - by letdown13 - United States (New York)

Today, I confronted my boss to find out why I was denied a promotion that she promised to me. Her response? "You should know by now I'm a liar. Not my fault if you believe the things I say." FML

#20680205
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35393) - you deserved it (3240)

On 05/22/2013 at 5:48pm - work - by Snurkles McGee (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was dancing in the passenger seat of my car with my family when a cop pulled us over. He thought I was trying to flag him down for help. I guess I'm not as good of a dancer as I thought. FML

#20662599
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37789) - you deserved it (12066)

On 05/14/2013 at 7:32am - misc - by ktorih137 - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, it was my very last day teaching my dance class. After the class ended, the owner of the studio started clapping and told all my students to give me a hug. No one hugged me. No one. FML

#20691616
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43335) - you deserved it (5059)

On 05/28/2013 at 6:14pm - work - by funnygirl018 - United States

Today, I have an upset stomach. Every other minute, it sounds like Chewbacca is screaming to get out. FML

#20675696
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35172) - you deserved it (4438)

On 05/20/2013 at 4:14pm - health - by pixkalexi - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that me having a boyfriend is an on-going family joke. FML

#20694663
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42429) - you deserved it (3750)

On 05/30/2013 at 1:37am - love - by I'm a joke? -

Today, I got a promotion and transfer at work. My first responsibility is to fire my soon to be father in-law. FML

#20708889
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55920) - you deserved it (3023)

On 06/06/2013 at 1:08am - work - by hesgonnahateme - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I arrived at my grandparents'. They already had guests so I had to sleep in the cottage. It wasn’t that bad until when I was making the bed I found a dead rotting possum in the blankets. When I told my grandmother, she simply said, "Deal with it, wimp." FML

#20718430
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41637) - you deserved it (4048)

On 06/10/2013 at 10:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to introduce my boyfriend to my parents. My dad just looked him dead in the eyes and said, "How much did she pay you? I doubt it was enough." FML

#20723714
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45030) - you deserved it (3402)

On 06/13/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I was preparing a customer's meal in my restaurant's kitchen, when I choked on my own saliva and went into a coughing fit. The head chef, who's always hated my guts, accused me of trying to hock a loogie into the meal and fired me on the spot. FML

#20807935
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42385) - you deserved it (3114)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:23pm - work - by fuckthisandfuckthatandfuckyoutoo (man) - United States

Today, my college English teacher told me if I wanted an explanation for my grade I would have to schedule a conference to come to her office. It's an online class. I took an online class because I can't come in. FML

#20774966
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39318) - you deserved it (3884)

On 07/10/2013 at 8:15pm - work - by myl1f3isfuct (woman) - United States



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