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Today, my boss walked in and said something I didn't quite hear, but my co-worker chuckled so to be polite, I laughed with him. They gave me some weird looks. My boss was actually talking about his wife's tumor and my co-worker was coughing. FML

#14471297
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10180) - you deserved it (29689)

On 01/05/2011 at 2:41am - work - by sucks (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML

#14225014
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6443) - you deserved it (25629)

On 12/16/2010 at 3:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was able to land a nice apartment solely based on the fact that my puppy is potty trained. During the required pet interview, my dog 'got sick' and defecated all over the apartment office. I now have to clean the mess knowing that I will not be allowed to live there. FML

#14339155
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21179) - you deserved it (3640)

On 12/25/2010 at 9:29pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got off work and checked my makeup in the mirror once I got in my car. I had a huge piece of spinach on my front tooth that no one told me about. I work the front desk of an upscale hotel and have been greeting guests all day. FML

#14575299
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22724) - you deserved it (4793)

On 01/14/2011 at 5:11am - work - by embarassed (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I found out that in conclusion to working five nights in a row, I'm scheduled to work the night shift on Valentine's day with my ex-boyfriend. FML

Today, I got a call from my daughter's school. Apparently, she was learning about the food pyramid and when she was asked to identify what she had eaten the day before, she said "dog food". FML

#15114722
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27486) - you deserved it (4095)

On 02/25/2011 at 1:44pm - kids - by Ldp56 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up and stepped out of bed right into a pile of dog crap. Acting quickly, I jumped on to my other foot, which would have been a great idea, except for this morning there were two piles. FML

#14836412
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28428) - you deserved it (5389)

On 02/04/2011 at 3:11am - animals - by unknown -

Today, I was running late for school because I had a huge stomach ache. To save on time, I took a taxi. When the taxi driver hit a bump, I lost control of my bowels and shit myself. Not only do I have to wash my underwear in the sink at school now, but I had to pay the driver extra to remove the smell from his car. FML

#14731547
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26501) - you deserved it (5036)

On 01/27/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by Username - Romania (Ilfov)

Today, my extremely superstitious girlfriend called me and said she couldn't make it to the date I had planned tonight. Her reason? "I sense something horrible is going to happen." I was planning to propose. FML

#14653951
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40317) - you deserved it (3404)

On 01/20/2011 at 8:15pm - love - by fianceeless (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend's mother who lives with us decided that since I work from home, it would be a good idea for her to stay home and keep me company. "Keeping me company" includes ordering me to make her food, gossiping non stop, and ridiculing me for not being the woman that she always saw her son marrying. FML

#14664315
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29185) - you deserved it (3158)

On 01/21/2011 at 5:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while at a work meeting, I finally summoned up the courage to share and express my opinions about unprofessionalism in the office. After the meeting, I went to clean up, only to notice in the bathroom mirror that I'd had a booger pasted across my forehead throughout the meeting. FML

#15098921
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18871) - you deserved it (19945)

On 02/24/2011 at 3:27am - misc - by Eric Forrest - United States (Utah)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barge in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML

#15056238
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34762) - you deserved it (7879)

On 02/20/2011 at 8:19pm - intimacy - by killmenow (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I choked on my saliva during a medical interview. FML

#18988836
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20857) - you deserved it (2920)

On 02/04/2012 at 12:22am - health - by foxyreegan - United States (North Carolina)



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