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Today, I thought it would be to a good idea to introduce my indoor cat to my dog. The pee stains, multiple scratches, and puncture wounds to my face prove otherwise. FML

#20994387
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32276) - you deserved it (9358)

On 12/16/2013 at 3:52am - animals - by Ramis182 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I noticed my laptop kept shutting down and the mouse cursor was all over the place, clicking on every folder. I dismantled the entire computer only to notice something in one of my USB drives: the receiver to a wireless mouse my colleague put there earlier to play a prank on me. 5ML

#21037915
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34843) - you deserved it (7481)

On 01/24/2014 at 2:16am - work - by Kenny (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)

Today, my family and I were celebrating my dad's birthday. The two of us were standing by the pool chatting, and I jokingly said "You're old now." I suppose I should have expected him to shove me into the pool, my phone still in hand, and retort, "You're soaked now." FML

#21054564
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32161) - you deserved it (17040)

On 02/08/2014 at 3:54pm - misc - by fuck you, dad (man) - United States (California)

Today, after paying at the gas station, the cashier stuck out her hand, which was clenched into a fist. I thought she wanted a fist-bump, so I gave her one. She just stared back at me. Turns out she was just trying to give me my change. FML

#21075108
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37277) - you deserved it (14969)

On 03/01/2014 at 4:09pm - money - by SarahNB - United States (Utah)

Today, it was a really slow day at work. One thing lead to another, and soon enough we were all taking turns shoving each other across the office on a swivel chair. Our boss came in during my turn, and I got singled out for a verbal warning. Everyone else got off with a disapproving glare. FML

#21084165
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36536) - you deserved it (9185)

On 03/11/2014 at 5:35pm - work - by shonfyr (man) - Spain

Today, I got to spend 4 hours on a bus with a group of selfie-taking teenagers who spent the majority of the time trying to harmonize while singing various songs. I'm pretty sure half of them were tone deaf. FML

#21092926
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36537) - you deserved it (3691)

On 03/21/2014 at 7:59pm - misc - by please stop singing!!!! - United States (Florida)

Today, I called the cops on a couple who was fighting outside my window at 4am. They hid in the bushes when the cops came, came back out when they left, and started fighting again. FML

#21142655
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43679) - you deserved it (4378)

On 05/17/2014 at 6:11am - misc - by frustrated - United States (Illinois)

Today, my landlord's control issue got out of control when I got a call telling me I have "too much stuff" and have to move out of the apartment. I sold all my furniture when I moved in and all I currently own is a scratch post, a chair and a pair of curtains. FML

#21145421
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39613) - you deserved it (3735)

On 05/19/2014 at 5:44pm - money - by that makes me a sad panda (woman) - Sweden (Vasterbottens Lan)

Today, I was creeping on an old coworker's Facebook and noticed they'd tagged my face in an old group photo as another girl. According to the comments, the girl they'd tagged me as thought it was her too. I worked there for two years and nobody mentioned the mistake. FML

#21148062
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35068) - you deserved it (5152)

On 05/22/2014 at 1:51am - misc - by ForgottenSarahMarshall (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after losing his job, I reassured my boyfriend by telling him I'd rather be with him living in a cardboard box than to be without him. He responded by telling me he'd rather be dead. FML

#21194528
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42209) - you deserved it (5459)

On 07/01/2014 at 12:26am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, as I was using the public restroom in the mall, someone decided to slam the stall door next to mine. This resulted in my stall door opening while I was still on the toilet. The door was too far for me to reach. FML

#21155744
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44104) - you deserved it (4383)

On 05/29/2014 at 10:14am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, my roommate's pets conspired against me. "The dog ate my homework" has apparently become too clichéd for them. The new excuses are, "My cat chewed through my laptop power cable" and "the gecko ate my pen drive." FML

#21171341
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40769) - you deserved it (4431)

On 06/11/2014 at 8:00pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I went on a date with a girl who had to cut our date short so she could go on another one. FML

#21313753
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34316) - you deserved it (3267)

On 12/08/2014 at 12:58pm - love - by Anonomous - Canada (Ontario)



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  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

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