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Today, I was at the beach with a group of friends, including the guy I like. As soon as we got to the beach, I ran toward the water and he chased after me. It was a beautiful moment until I looked back at him, tripped, fell on my face and slid down the beach. FML

#21224233
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38757) - you deserved it (6376)

On 07/29/2014 at 10:36pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

#21242424
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39399) - you deserved it (7293)

On 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm - misc - by royallymessedup -

Today, I got sick at school. When someone called my mom for permission for me to leave, she told them she doesn't have a daughter and to never call that number again. FML

Today, what few friends I have won't talk to me anymore. My ex told them she dumped me because I abused her. I never abused her. What really happened is that she dumped me in a rage after I refused to give her money for drugs. Nobody's even asked for my side of the story. FML

#21306153
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36317) - you deserved it (2279)

On 11/26/2014 at 11:42am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of six years. She got mad at me, saying she is too young to get married and that I was trying to ruin her career. She is 32 and works part-time at a grocery store. FML

#21322620
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34067) - you deserved it (3072)

On 12/23/2014 at 10:24am - love - by got any coupons? - United States

Today, I took a shit of biblical proportions. I flushed and opened a window, but my pregnant wife went in straight after me. Her morning sickness kicked in and she quickly ran out, vomit dripping from her mouth. She's pissed and thinks I planned the whole thing as a prank. FML

#21258820
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35817) - you deserved it (4055)

On 09/15/2014 at 2:48pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, I left for a fifteen-hour drive with two guys who won't stop talking in a Yoda voice. Sick of this nonsense, I am. FML

#21277425
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33135) - you deserved it (4475)

On 10/14/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by longdrive - United States (California)

Today, I went to a big job interview. As I walked in, I tripped and fell flat on my face. Other highlights include my voice cracking multiple times, sweating profusely and getting uncontrollable nervous giggling. The interviewer eventually stared at me in disbelief and asked if I was high. FML

#21285028
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34533) - you deserved it (4642)

On 10/25/2014 at 2:27pm - work - by not on life, that's for fucking sure (man) - United States

Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML

#21378385
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25873) - you deserved it (3096)

On 03/20/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my husband and I told my parents I was pregnant with my first child. The only thing my father did was look at my husband and tell him his pull out game was weak. FML

#21299949
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35143) - you deserved it (3436)

On 11/16/2014 at 12:29am - kids - by wtfdad - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I saw a little old lady trying to cross the street. I went over and tried to help her. Turned out she was actually just a really short young woman. As soon as I took her arm, she screamed in front of everyone and accused me of trying to molest her. FML

#21339220
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28571) - you deserved it (7751)

On 01/17/2015 at 10:45pm - misc - by Help Me (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my drunk mom told me to apologize for being born. FML

#21352091
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34964) - you deserved it (2796)

On 02/08/2015 at 1:28pm - misc - by sorry :/ - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was talking to my friend in Spanish because he understands it better than English. We were in the middle of a discussion about a TV show when some guy from our school ran up, spat on my shoes and screamed, "I SPEAK SPANISH, STOP TALKING ABOUT ME!" and ran away. FML



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