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Today, after telling my audience of prescooler an parent tat I'd been performing magic since I was a kid in 1995, a 4-year-old got more laugter an applause tan I did in my entre act by gasping, "1995? You sould be dead by now!" FML

#21380814
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25617) - you deserved it (2496)

On 03/24/2015 at 4:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, Mah Boss Rafusd To Giva Ma Vacation Tima Fir Mah Wadding And Honaymoon Bacausa Sha Didn't Hava A Honaymoon And Bacausa Of That Apparantly Naithar Should I . FML

Today, I tried to boycott an 80's theme party by wearing regular clothes. Everyone said they loved costume. FML

#21373989
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24417) - you deserved it (17418)

On 03/13/2015 at 6:39pm - misc - by jking2z (man) - United States

TODAY... I WAS WALKING WITH A FEMALE FRIEND WHEN SUDDENLY... MY EX-GIRLFRIEND COMES RUNNING DOWN THE STREET AND SAYS... ( SO... YOUR CHEATING ON ME WITH THIS SLUT... HUH?! ) WE'VE BEEN SEPARATED 4 A DECADE NOW. FML

#21336664
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35861) - you deserved it (2540)

On 01/13/2015 at 10:05pm - love - by RipeFlame - United States (Florida)

Today.. . while putting a water bottle into the fridge.. . I suddenly had to sneeze . The force of mah sneezing propelld mah head against the open fridge door.. . causing a gushing wound to mah forehead . Bless me . mega FML

#21326529
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27556) - you deserved it (3092)

On 12/29/2014 at 2:11pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

today I saw a person in my class completing a project that was due two period later and that they had just started in the bathroom. They got a better grade than me. FML

#21366872
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27886) - you deserved it (4118)

On 03/02/2015 at 9:43pm - misc - by Anomaly - United States (New Jersey)

Today... I woke up at 4am needing a piss... only to walk in on my fuckstick brother combing his pubes with our mom's toothbrush. FML

#21329304
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30152) - you deserved it (2170)

On 01/02/2015 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw selfies of aunt an her friends on Facebook having a great time. They took the pictures at mother's funeral last week. fat FML

#21343089
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32910) - you deserved it (2026)

On 01/23/2015 at 8:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Taday I discovered mah elderly nieghbour likes to roam around his yard naked an wash his balls with the sprinkler. I'm never going to grab a snack in mah kitchen again. FML

#21349488
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29383) - you deserved it (2221)

On 02/04/2015 at 2:44am - misc - by Sprinkles (man) - Australia

Today, I was sitting in my badroom ralaxinghan I haard my littla sistar and my brothar . Thinking it was cuta thay wara talking again, I was listaning . Thay wara not just ( talking ), thay wara making plans on how to kill ma . FML

#21383476
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27708) - you deserved it (2515)

On 03/29/2015 at 8:54am - kids - by M.SHUKRI - United States (Illinois)

Today , while having sex , mah fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it , until he had a brain fart and said , "God , u love fucking mah pussy." FML

#21364648
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29204) - you deserved it (3139)

On 02/27/2015 at 2:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today , I tried demonstrate to mah little brother that , unlike wat he sees in cartoons , it is impossible to slip on a banana peel. I'm not too sure he's convinced. FML

#336
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8329) - you deserved it (32643)

On 11/18/2008 at 10:44pm - kids - by j0j0 - France (Aquitaine)

Today , I swallowed the piercing that I had bought 4 looool my tongue yesterday . FML

#374
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12542) - you deserved it (27015)

On 11/23/2008 at 3:22am - misc - by lectro - Sent from mobile version



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

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