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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, the snow in my backyard melted, revealing just how much dog shit accumulated underneath it this winter. FML

#21090227
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33501) - you deserved it (7199)

On 03/18/2014 at 6:53pm - animals - by holyshitsnacks - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw a kid getting bullied; a girl was hitting him in the head. After having an inner struggle with what to do, I tried to stop them. Both kids then turned on me, and called me a "hippo". FML

#21078067
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38215) - you deserved it (3986)

On 03/04/2014 at 5:55pm - kids - by meandme (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

#21072961
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33994) - you deserved it (11847)

On 02/27/2014 at 6:59am - work - by doodler - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my grandmother what she looked like when she was young. She casually replied, "I was ugly, sweetie. Just like you." FML

#21080512
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39493) - you deserved it (3996)

On 03/07/2014 at 1:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Philippines (Quezon City)

Today, I met my future mother-in-law. All went well; she complimented my dress, and I complimented her haircut. Then she and her son had a screaming match over how our children will be fat because of their mother. FML

#21093159
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39356) - you deserved it (3554)

On 03/22/2014 at 12:49am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, disappointed with my results on a mathematics test, I went over it and realized my teacher had added up the marks incorrectly, leaving me with 17% less than I earned. The person who's supposed to be teaching me math can't even perform basic arithmetic. FML

#21101903
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40328) - you deserved it (3664)

On 04/01/2014 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my grandma reduced me to a sobbing wreck in two short sentences, just to win a bet against my mum. FML

#21098667
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36070) - you deserved it (4331)

On 03/28/2014 at 4:25pm - misc - by :( (woman) - Sweden (Vasterbottens Lan)

Today, my father took me out for some driving lessons. Out of nowhere, a huge, apparently suicidal bird dove into the windshield, putting a crack in it. My father yelled at me as if it was my fault, and is demanding I pay for the repairs. FML

#21110397
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42122) - you deserved it (3505)

On 04/11/2014 at 4:07pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - Switzerland

Today, I had to tell my daughter that just because markers say "washable", it doesn't mean that you can draw all over our newly-painted walls. She's 15. FML

#21102656
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41860) - you deserved it (6090)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:16am - kids - by IcyWinter - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML

#21104415
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33470) - you deserved it (18447)

On 04/04/2014 at 1:26pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, I went to a veterans' reunion party with my grandpa. While there, a guy started yelling at me for having an unapproved haircut. It was my grandpa's old drill sergeant, and he thought I was in the army too. Everyone just smirked as he forced me to drop and do push-ups. FML

#21110214
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33868) - you deserved it (5230)

On 04/11/2014 at 10:51am - misc - by Gomer (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend's little brother challenged me to a water gun fight. I accepted, not knowing he was going to fill his gun with vinegar, then shoot me in the eyes with it. FML

#21111233
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41468) - you deserved it (4235)

On 04/12/2014 at 3:59pm - kids - by BeatByA9yrold (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got a Facebook message from a cute guy I used to work with. He admitted to liking me and when I asked why we never hung out he admitted that my dad, his boss at the time, threatened every guy I have ever worked with. FML

#21113585
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48533) - you deserved it (3791)

On 04/15/2014 at 10:01am - love - by cricha4208 - United States (Missouri)



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