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Today, I received my employee ID, which I have to wear at all times at my new job. The only problem is that in my photo, I look like a donkey having a seizure. Customers keep snickering at it, and my boss thinks I posed like that deliberately. FML

#21092790
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34021) - you deserved it (4175)

On 03/21/2014 at 4:46pm - work - by Lady Madeira von Cuntshunt (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my parents decided to get with the times. So far, they've made me get Snapchat and Instagram accounts, and made me add them on Facebook. They keep acting like annoying teenagers, and get mad at me when I don't play along. For the love of god, somebody save me. FML

#21134960
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43780) - you deserved it (4967)

On 05/09/2014 at 4:41pm - misc - by Anais Strongrump III Jr. (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my computer crashed and lost all of its data while I was making a back up. FML

#21134602
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40278) - you deserved it (3840)

On 05/09/2014 at 1:35am - misc - by mlowy - Azerbaijan (Baki)

Today, I woke up and stumbled over to my window to soak up some morning sunshine. The sunshine was lovely; the sight of my elderly neighbour doing some kind of nude yoga in his backyard certainly was not. FML

#21149493
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43878) - you deserved it (5022)

On 05/23/2014 at 6:46pm - intimacy - by fucking hell my eyes burn (man) - Germany

Today, things got so bad with my mother-in-law that I seriously considered faking my entire family's deaths to escape it all. FML

#21157433
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37831) - you deserved it (4410)

On 05/30/2014 at 6:33pm - misc - by save me (man) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML

#21247953
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44409) - you deserved it (6596)

On 08/29/2014 at 4:15pm - intimacy - by SCARRED (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. After breaking the news to my parents, I heard my dad mutter when I left, "Damn it, I liked her better than him." My mother didn't protest. FML

#21196912
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50947) - you deserved it (11872)

On 07/03/2014 at 12:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I heard back from a company that I recently interviewed with. They told me I didn't get the job because "it was obvious that I had been coached." I wasn't. Sorry that I actually researched the company unlike the rest of the nit-wit candidates. FML

#21203575
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44416) - you deserved it (3349)

On 07/09/2014 at 1:02am - work - by jobless (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I received a gift certificate from my grandmother for a local bookshop. Considering how broke I am, this would be a fantastic gift. If the bookshop in question wasn't a right-wing evangelical Christian Bookshop, and I wasn't Jewish. FML

#21315500
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26475) - you deserved it (3035)

On 12/11/2014 at 8:29am - misc - by Soverytired (woman) - Australia

Today, my boss told me to fire the unstable, former military, gun nut employee. He's been making death threats to his supervisors. FML

#21293180
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31765) - you deserved it (2471)

On 11/06/2014 at 1:53am - work - by HelpMe1 (man) - Indonesia (Jakarta Raya)

Today, I got suspended from work after getting caught reading a work-related FML. Irony is funny, but it doesn't pay the bills. FML

#21226986
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32288) - you deserved it (15578)

On 08/01/2014 at 6:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, for the third time this week, I had to clean up after someone who pissed themselves in the beer aisle at the grocery store where I work. FML

#21216504
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36762) - you deserved it (3123)

On 07/21/2014 at 5:15pm - work - by notpayedenoughforthisshit (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was skating in the city when I slipped and fractured my arm. As I was lying in pain, a guy walked up to me, frisked my pocket and took my wallet. He then said: "It's nothing personal." FML

#21281599
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36743) - you deserved it (2931)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:50am - misc - by ColdStones (man) - Norway (Hordaland)



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