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Today, I wore a sexy nurse's outfit for a little roleplay with my boyfriend. After the main event, he said the sex was actually pretty bad and that he should file a medical malpractice lawsuit. Then he laughed at his own joke, got dressed, and went out for drinks. FML

#21245913
78 comments

Today, I overheard my boyfriend saying to his friends, "I never knew what real contraception was until I saw Laura's face." I'm Laura. FML

#21219482
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41785) - you deserved it (4029)

On 07/24/2014 at 4:51pm - love - by I don't condome that, babe (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, these cute girls approached me and asked me to take a picture of them. One girl asked me if I could send it to her because her phone had died. I was excited to have her number, but it turns out that she deleted the message after she sent the picture to herself. FML

#21330933
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25908) - you deserved it (6336)

On 01/04/2015 at 10:10pm - love - by fml - United States

Today, I was let go from my internship for "not putting in enough effort". I was working 50 hours a week for almost zero pay. FML

#21386456
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30625) - you deserved it (2278)

On 04/02/2015 at 10:48am - work - by Wellfu (woman) - Europe

Today, my boyfriend canceled his plans to attend my father's wake, not even 10 minutes after he found out there won't be any alcohol on offer. FML

#21253199
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34821) - you deserved it (3804)

On 09/06/2014 at 6:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up from a horrible nightmare. What was it about? Me accidentally scratching a non-stick pan with my utility knife. FML

Today, I took my driving test. I was really nervous, but I thought I did pretty well in the end. That is until I parked the car and looked to the examiner. He was visibly shaken. He said I'd passed, quickly filled in the paperwork and left. On the downside, my car still smells of his shart. FML

#21339037
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31333) - you deserved it (3407)

On 01/17/2015 at 5:24pm - misc - by for shite's sake (man) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)

Today, I found out the hard way that no good girlfriend-boyfriend conversation ever started with, "Suppose I slept with your best friend..." FML

#21229506
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41946) - you deserved it (8707)

On 08/04/2014 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I'm getting married. I have a big poofy white dress and, oh yes, the shits. Here's hoping I can make it down the aisle without rushing off to the toilet. FML

#21241662
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42234) - you deserved it (3156)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:01pm - love - by ithinkicanmakeit - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my skinny co-worker complained that sitting just underneath the AC vent was making her too cold. My boss had us switch places, because "your mass keeps you warm anyway". FML

#21288043
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32462) - you deserved it (4551)

On 10/29/2014 at 10:41pm - work - by OfficeFatty - United States

Today, my new friend tried to introduce me to "American Culture," as I am new to the city. He explained what a hamburger is and how it differs from the Asian food I was used to eating. I moved from Seattle and have worked at Burger King. FML

#21317624
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33491) - you deserved it (2663)

On 12/14/2014 at 10:30pm - misc - by AsianSensation (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML

#21271220
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37680) - you deserved it (3441)

On 10/05/2014 at 1:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

#21284275
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37797) - you deserved it (10997)

On 10/24/2014 at 6:54am - intimacy - by too good - United Kingdom (Kent)



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Friday 26 June 2015

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