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Today, my mom came home from surgery. Upon arriving home, she flashed a paper in my face and said, "Want to see pictures of my colon?" My eyes are still burning. FML

#18703060
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21125) - you deserved it (2687)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:15am - health - by emsbuffalo - United States

Today, I was at my cousin's house. We weren't spending time together because he was always texting. After a couple of minutes, I got jealous. I played a ringtone on my cell, and "answered" it. I had a whole conversation with nobody in an attempt to seem somewhat more popular than a 10-year-old. FML

#17752355
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10176) - you deserved it (24495)

On 09/15/2011 at 5:46pm - misc - by ForeverAlone (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was my first day at work as a waitress. The day ended with me owing my employers money, after I accidentally smashed an expensive bottle of wine on the floor. FML

#18493927
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22822) - you deserved it (4524)

On 12/12/2011 at 12:08pm - work - by isuckasawaitress (woman) - Singapore

Today, we found out where our daughter had been hiding her crayons. We also found out why our stereo stopped working. FML

#18619223
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21178) - you deserved it (2538)

On 12/26/2011 at 9:24pm - kids - by Peter - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I called an airline's customer service line. Apparently the way that they deal with uncommon problems is by having someone put you on hold for twenty minutes, answer and yell something unintelligible at you, put you back on hold, and repeat. This went on for over an hour. FML

#19397003
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17136) - you deserved it (1718)

On 04/02/2012 at 7:40pm - money - by unfriendlyskies (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I went to deliver some reports to my boss in his office. He was facing away from me and ranting about his "useless employees", so I slipped in and waited for him to put the phone down. Turns out he was talking to himself. When he noticed me, he bitched me out and threatened to fire me. FML

#18954883
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20066) - you deserved it (3629)

On 01/30/2012 at 7:20pm - work - by robert (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after my old downstairs neighbor, who would come upstairs to bang on my door and yell at me every time she heard a sound from me at all times of the day, had finally moved out, it became clear that my new downstairs neighbor gets drunk and yells at the TV in the early hours of the morning. FML

Today, I went on a coffee date with the man I've been in love with for a while. Before I knew what was going on, he'd started chatting up a pretty girl sitting nearby. I had to drink my coffee alone while he got her number. FML

#20113670
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21454) - you deserved it (2106)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:43pm - love - by firstdategonebad - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that the "vines" I was cutting down this morning were actually poison oak. I can only see out of one eye, and I'm virtually unrecognizable due to the facial swelling. FML

#20052545
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19242) - you deserved it (3479)

On 09/01/2012 at 1:37pm - health - by merissa22 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found myself trying to explain to my puppy why I'm still single. I think I just found out why. FML

#20028660
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18148) - you deserved it (5674)

On 08/18/2012 at 7:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had to pick my parents up from the hospital and drive them back home, after they were treated for eating large amounts of cheese that my dad claimed to have "aged" for several years. FML

#20116789
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17258) - you deserved it (1254)

On 10/14/2012 at 4:36pm - health - by oppafucktardstyle (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my grandmother said to me, "You look just like your mother did at your age. Except you're fatter of course." FML

#20148363
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19320) - you deserved it (4242)

On 11/05/2012 at 12:39am - misc - by poro123 - United Kingdom

Today, I'm at home, sick with walking pneumonia and a raging UTI. Every time I cough, I piss myself. I'm now having to lie on a bath towel and garbage bags until the meds kick in. FML

#20145285
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21495) - you deserved it (1362)

On 11/03/2012 at 1:34am - health - by jdch_99 - Canada (Ontario)



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