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Today, I saw a girl wearing a Nirvana shirt. Since Nirvana has been my favorite band for a long time, I tried striking up a conversation with her. Turns out she doesn't even listen to them, and only bought the shirt because she "liked the smiley face." FML

#17902155
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29153) - you deserved it (4894)

On 10/04/2011 at 4:57am - misc - by storksleuth (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, was the first day of my new job. My boss admitted that they hadn't cleaned the employee bathroom for over two months. My first task: clean the employee bathroom. FML

#19343109
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21473) - you deserved it (1740)

On 03/25/2012 at 3:12am - misc - by LesToiliettes - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was very cold and tired, so I took a shower to warm up and went to bed. The minute I hopped into bed, it collapsed and broke. I have spent half-an-hour rearranging furniture to get the mattress on to the floor. Now I'm cold again. FML

#19173617
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20379) - you deserved it (2850)

On 02/27/2012 at 7:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was woken up by a call from "the Nuisance Call Prevention Registry". The lady on the telephone didn't see the irony. FML

#19405538
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20295) - you deserved it (1857)

On 04/04/2012 at 6:58am - misc - by Telemarket (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my mom came home from surgery. Upon arriving home, she flashed a paper in my face and said, "Want to see pictures of my colon?" My eyes are still burning. FML

#18703060
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21117) - you deserved it (2685)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:15am - health - by emsbuffalo - United States

Today, I was at my cousin's house. We weren't spending time together because he was always texting. After a couple of minutes, I got jealous. I played a ringtone on my cell, and "answered" it. I had a whole conversation with nobody in an attempt to seem somewhat more popular than a 10-year-old. FML

#17752355
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10171) - you deserved it (24486)

On 09/15/2011 at 5:46pm - misc - by ForeverAlone (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was my first day at work as a waitress. The day ended with me owing my employers money, after I accidentally smashed an expensive bottle of wine on the floor. FML

#18493927
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22814) - you deserved it (4523)

On 12/12/2011 at 12:08pm - work - by isuckasawaitress (woman) - Singapore

Today, we found out where our daughter had been hiding her crayons. We also found out why our stereo stopped working. FML

#18619223
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21173) - you deserved it (2536)

On 12/26/2011 at 9:24pm - kids - by Peter - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I called an airline's customer service line. Apparently the way that they deal with uncommon problems is by having someone put you on hold for twenty minutes, answer and yell something unintelligible at you, put you back on hold, and repeat. This went on for over an hour. FML

#19397003
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17134) - you deserved it (1718)

On 04/02/2012 at 7:40pm - money - by unfriendlyskies (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I went to deliver some reports to my boss in his office. He was facing away from me and ranting about his "useless employees", so I slipped in and waited for him to put the phone down. Turns out he was talking to himself. When he noticed me, he bitched me out and threatened to fire me. FML

#18954883
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20061) - you deserved it (3628)

On 01/30/2012 at 7:20pm - work - by robert (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after my old downstairs neighbor, who would come upstairs to bang on my door and yell at me every time she heard a sound from me at all times of the day, had finally moved out, it became clear that my new downstairs neighbor gets drunk and yells at the TV in the early hours of the morning. FML

Today, I went on a coffee date with the man I've been in love with for a while. Before I knew what was going on, he'd started chatting up a pretty girl sitting nearby. I had to drink my coffee alone while he got her number. FML

#20113670
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21447) - you deserved it (2105)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:43pm - love - by firstdategonebad - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that the "vines" I was cutting down this morning were actually poison oak. I can only see out of one eye, and I'm virtually unrecognizable due to the facial swelling. FML

#20052545
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19234) - you deserved it (3479)

On 09/01/2012 at 1:37pm - health - by merissa22 - United States (Illinois)



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