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Today, I overhead my mother's request to be spanked harder by my dad. FML

#6532125
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21066) - you deserved it (1782)

On 11/30/2009 at 11:51am - intimacy - by NeedHeadPhone (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my water wouldn't go down my shower drain. Confused, I stuck a metal stick expecting hair, but instead stabbed and pulled up a rat that was dead in my drain. FML

#6349337
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29065) - you deserved it (1698)

On 11/17/2009 at 11:08pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss told me when I transfer to a Target in Orlando I should work in the clothing department. He said it would be a good way for me to meet chicks. I told him all the girls who work in clothing in that store are ugly as hell. Apparently his daughters work there. I never knew that. FML

#7210467
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6630) - you deserved it (22475)

On 01/08/2010 at 12:39am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I hit a parked car. It happened to be my driving instructor's car. While he was instructing me, sitting in the passenger seat. I don't think I'll pass. FML

#6497177
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19695) - you deserved it (11702)

On 11/28/2009 at 4:37pm - misc - by badDriver (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, for the third time this week, my boss made me switch desks. Each new desk is closer to the door than the last one. I think he's trying to tell me something. FML

#6479352
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25570) - you deserved it (2120)

On 11/27/2009 at 2:51pm - work - by Fmyoffice (man) - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML

#6691654
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23717) - you deserved it (4378)

On 12/10/2009 at 6:47am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)

Today, my dad and I were watching Hawaii play the Navy in football. I cheered when Hawaii won. My dad turns to me and says, "You know your mother and I concieved you there?" Thanks Dad. FML

#6507580
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14491) - you deserved it (2995)

On 11/29/2009 at 2:09am - intimacy - by hawaiianlovechild - United States

Today, my dad and I found in my house a water filter that has not been changed in over 20 years. We have been drinking that water that has been going through a filter that had more colors than a rainbow on it. FML

#6949871
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21020) - you deserved it (7977)

On 12/26/2009 at 12:36am - misc - by shithole (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend told his parents about my bondage fetish. In front of me. FML

#6952293
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14451) - you deserved it (2833)

On 12/26/2009 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got in a car accident on the way to the DMV to take my drivers test. FML

#7059140
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18033) - you deserved it (8023)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my girlfriend canceled our date I've been looking forward to all week because her dog was having puppies. She doesn't have a dog. FML

#6877661
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23716) - you deserved it (2046)

On 12/22/2009 at 12:57am - love - by CRWMEN (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I noticed the woman I've been sleeping with for over 2 years never lets me see her naked during sex. I confronted her about it and she replied, "I don't care if you see me naked. I was just leaving the lights off the whole time so I don't have to see you naked." FML

#7147698
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18797) - you deserved it (3641)

On 01/04/2010 at 4:26pm - intimacy - by audied (man) - United States (California)

Today, I noticed white stuff in my colored clothes as I transferred them from the washer to the dryer. That's when I realized that the white stuff is my paycheck which I had put in my pants earlier. FML

#7122890
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22109) - you deserved it (12001)

On 01/03/2010 at 8:18am - money - by broke_kid - United States (North Carolina)



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