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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I opened the cabinet to take a pill for my headache. After taking the pill, I turned around and smashed my head on the open cabinet door. FML

#7475893
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25741) - you deserved it (7071)

On 01/21/2010 at 3:20pm - health - by imalwaystired - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got a letter in the mail, my mother has applied for a reduction in her child support payments for my brother and I. She's paid $10 child support in 16 years. FML

#7416712
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32266) - you deserved it (2000)

On 01/18/2010 at 9:23am - money - by bluewatersify - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I was taking a warm shower when someone in my house flushed the toilet, making the shower extremely hot. In my rush to get out so I wouldn't get burned, I slipped and knocked a tooth out. FML

#7321633
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32536) - you deserved it (4095)

On 01/13/2010 at 4:40pm - misc - by soccercrazed1520 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was getting a pedicure, and they used some sort of scrubby thing that really tickled my feet. When I couldn't take it any more, I accidentally kicked the lady who was doing my nails in the face. FML

#7562154
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12685) - you deserved it (22552)

On 01/25/2010 at 1:33am - health - by nyu (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was at a pet store cuddling an apparently overaggressive chinchilla when it decided to bite me and run out of my hands. It is now nowhere to be found and I have to pay for it. FML

#13886609
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23025) - you deserved it (9412)

On 11/18/2010 at 10:34am - misc - by alltimelove -

Today, I went to the movies with my friends. A pretty redhead came on the screen. One of my guy friends leaned over to me and said, "Have you noticed there aren't any pretty redheads in real life?" I guess he forgot what color my hair is. FML

#8516526
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29228) - you deserved it (2918)

On 02/21/2010 at 12:54pm - misc - by Mika_Ookami - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I went to a family funeral. Talking to my grandfather, trying the make chitchat, he says "You're gaining weight, aren't you?" FML

#8683563
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23647) - you deserved it (4008)

On 02/27/2010 at 5:15am - misc - by livvlynette (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was working a midnight shift when a guy came in drunk and was trying to get me to come home with him. I said I had a boyfriend. As I said this, my manager, who has no teeth and B.O, said he was my boyfriend. I will never live this down with my co-workers. FML

#14114912
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22112) - you deserved it (3721)

On 12/07/2010 at 12:28am - work - by anonymous-canada -

Today, after leaving work at 10 pm, I took a shortcut to the highway. After getting lost, my GPS informed me that the service was unavailable and I should try back in an hour. This occurred moments before I ran out of gas. FML

#8861127
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22979) - you deserved it (7995)

On 03/06/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by Lost... (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was one of five people called up to the front in class to receive a special notice from the school administration. The first four people received awards for outstanding effort in school. Mine was a notice that I had overdue library fines. FML

#10502352
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12083) - you deserved it (26365)

On 05/13/2010 at 3:39am - misc - by leftout (man) - United States (California)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to use my epilator on my eyebrows. Needless to say I now have the eyebrow equivalent of a comb-over. FML

#13389491
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6106) - you deserved it (24951)

On 10/10/2010 at 5:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my wife, daughter, and I get to spend the next 4 hours in the ER. Why? Because we're all throwing up at the same time. At least it counts as a family activity. FML

#11911346
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29319) - you deserved it (3261)

On 07/16/2010 at 12:17am - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boss quit his job and stopped coming in without warning. Guess who just inherited his tasks and responsibilities without the training or pay associated with his manager role. I was hired last year as a junior system admin. FML

#14267236
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25068) - you deserved it (2899)

On 12/20/2010 at 12:29am - work - by promoted (man) - Australia (Victoria)



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