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Today, in a last ditch attempt to get away from my psycho coworker, I made my boss transfer me to another branch in the district. My coworker was immediately moved to that branch, because we "work well together". FML

#21176055
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45885) - you deserved it (4316)

On 06/15/2014 at 10:21pm - work - by Godhelpme (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend's grandma took me to his house to hang out. I then heard her in the kitchen telling his mom how hard she tried to leave me at the nearest gas station. FML

Today, my mother came over to check on my new kitten while I was at work. She took a video of the kitten playing on my bed and climbing on my nightstand. Right on top of my vibrator I forgot to put away. I'm not sure if she noticed or not but she's certainly been showing the video around. FML

#21182483
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44660) - you deserved it (13894)

On 06/20/2014 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by misoranomegami (woman) - United States

Today, my dad made the local news. The business he owns is so run down and overgrown that it's officially a public health hazard. FML

#21189640
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40108) - you deserved it (4490)

On 06/26/2014 at 9:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I decided to confront my fear of birds when my friend's pet bird was walking up to me. He got on my arm, climbed up and attacked my face. FML

#21379871
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26449) - you deserved it (2923)

On 03/23/2015 at 12:42am - animals - by birdsterrifyme - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to decline the sale of alcohol to a man who reeked of booze and was practically falling asleep at my till. He tried to convince me that he wasn't drunk, he was just blind. Still refusing to sell him the beer, he started yelling at me, accusing me of "being racist against the 'blinds'". FML

#21256123
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36877) - you deserved it (2903)

On 09/11/2014 at 2:49am - work - by PerfectVision (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked my mom about signing up for an online dating site. She took one look at me and said, "Why get rejected online when you can just go outside for the same?" FML

#21229228
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37644) - you deserved it (3818)

On 08/04/2014 at 11:08am - misc - by baebookboo - United States (Kansas)

Today, my parents sat me down and told me that I'm adopted. I took it in stride, and reassured them that as far as I'm concerned, they're my true parents. That annoyed them. Apparently the whole thing was a prank for a YouTube video, which I ruined by not crying or freaking out. FML

#21247893
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45517) - you deserved it (2794)

On 08/29/2014 at 2:09pm - kids - by hannahka (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML

#21202372
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41593) - you deserved it (3005)

On 07/08/2014 at 12:26am - work - by MaddyN - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boss is still refusing to hire any more people because he's convinced I can handle all of the work after the majority of staff quit. FML

#21217678
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40954) - you deserved it (3296)

On 07/22/2014 at 8:51pm - work - by Inthedumps (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I spent 20 minutes arguing with the class dipshit, trying to convince her that wifi hot-spots are not in fact saunas powered by wifi. FML

#21302021
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29552) - you deserved it (3599)

On 11/19/2014 at 10:09am - misc - by Donutsarelife - United States

Today, I asked my mom why nobody likes me. She reeled off about a dozen reasons. FML

#21223790
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38860) - you deserved it (9332)

On 07/29/2014 at 2:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

#21251632
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42782) - you deserved it (3191)

On 09/04/2014 at 2:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)



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