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Today, I'm flying out of the country in a few hours. A plane from the same airline just crashed into the Hudson River and is now floating in it. FML

#1219
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19844) - you deserved it (2128)

On 01/15/2009 at 10:05am - misc - by Tom - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I called up my ex girlfriend to ask her if I could come round hers to get my pyjamas back. She replied: “I’m keeping them just in case...”- “In case of what?”- “In case I want to dress up like an asshole”. FML

#1859
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8313) - you deserved it (23534)

On 01/20/2009 at 9:01am - love - by dude - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got caught stealing lollies. I am 25. FML

#2620
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6606) - you deserved it (51150)

On 01/26/2009 at 8:28am - misc - by Timmy - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to buy some Ibuprofen and got asked for ID. You have to be over 16 to buy it. I'm 25. FML

#2946
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20229) - you deserved it (2389)

On 01/28/2009 at 12:21am - misc - by noneoftheabove - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I was in bed next to the boy I loved, he had just came and passed out immediately afterwards. I reached over to look at my phone but grabbed his instead and saw a text message from his ex-girlfriend that read "I love you too." FML

#3029
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44250) - you deserved it (3327)

On 01/28/2009 at 10:12am - intimacy - by splooge - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at a fraternity party, and one of the hosts said over the loudspeaker "turn to the person next to you and picture them naked, then drink a beer if the mental image disturbs you". I turned, only to be face-to-face with my ex-boyfriend. He drank two beers. FML

#47156
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35041) - you deserved it (4870)

On 02/15/2009 at 3:28pm - misc - by Noname - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I ran up to my boyfriend and gave him a kiss. I didn't understand why the girl next to him got upset, but it turns out the voicemail I deleted by accident was him breaking up with me. FML

#118057
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59482) - you deserved it (6800)

On 02/23/2009 at 9:31pm - love - by Kfeaaa (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I forgot to take my wallet off the roof of my car and drove away, onto the highway. A man behind me began flashing his lights and waving his arms. I thought he was freaking out because I cut him off. I flipped him off. He was trying to tell me that all my money was flying down the road. FML

#1047617
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7778) - you deserved it (76314)

On 04/17/2009 at 2:12am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I decided to go swimming. I knew my technique would be off because I haven't swam since high school. It was when I made it only halfway across the pool that the lifeguard decided to jump in and save me. I wasn't drowning or struggling. FML

#2780128
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39873) - you deserved it (4126)

On 06/10/2009 at 6:50pm - health - by anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I spent hours arguing with my mother, who claimed I shouldn't make a three hour drive because I wouldn't be able to concentrate for that long. I argued that I was a perfectly capable driver, and left. In the last 2 minutes of the journey, I hit a van and messed up the front of my car. FML

#3466010
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12954) - you deserved it (35347)

On 07/03/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by neverdrivingagain (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my grandma gave me a gift (something she has never done before). I was so excited until I found out it was one of her overdue library books on dolphins. I feel so loved. FML

#1620964
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43034) - you deserved it (2644)

On 05/04/2009 at 8:35am - misc - by hawtpinkpanties (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing a game where you ask sexual questions and you have to give an honest answer. At one point, I asked my boyfriend what his favorite position is, to which he quickly answered with no hesitation, "Any one where I don't have to see your face or body." FML

#5369665
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25059) - you deserved it (3788)

On 09/20/2009 at 10:42am - intimacy - by uglyallover (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at work my arms were full. I needed to get the door open, so instead of pushing the swing door open with my shoulder, I kicked it open with my foot. Right into my manager's face. FML

#2647799
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34115) - you deserved it (10930)

On 06/05/2009 at 11:36pm - work - by hellogoodbye (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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