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Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML

#2727
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22470) - you deserved it (2218)

On 01/26/2009 at 6:44pm - misc - by glittercat - United States (Missouri)

Today, I went to buy some Ibuprofen and got asked for ID. You have to be over 16 to buy it. I'm 25. FML

#2946
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17062) - you deserved it (2070)

On 01/28/2009 at 12:21am - misc - by noneoftheabove - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I was in bed next to the boy I loved, he had just came and passed out immediately afterwards. I reached over to look at my phone but grabbed his instead and saw a text message from his ex-girlfriend that read "I love you too." FML

#3029
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40646) - you deserved it (3000)

On 01/28/2009 at 10:12am - intimacy - by splooge - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was collecting on a bet I had with a buddy on a sports game. He owed me lunch. I have a huge crush on the waitress and told him. She asked if we wanted the checks split and he said, "No, my boyfriend doesn't have any money." FML

#4148
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25327) - you deserved it (4926)

On 01/31/2009 at 1:19pm - love - by MichiganExile - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was playing with 3 kids I look after. The middle one has just learned about sex and started chanting that I had done it with the eldest as a joke. We were in the garden and the neighbours heard. Now I am fired, have to leave the house and am being investigated by the police. FML

#4463
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57432) - you deserved it (2549)

On 02/01/2009 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Jack - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I realized that I know more about Paris Hilton's cervix than how my government is run. FML

#6894
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4814) - you deserved it (26703)

On 02/03/2009 at 7:11pm - misc - by parishiltonsbff (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was in the car with a group of my girl friends discussing sexual experiences when I looked down and realized my Blackberry had dialed the family I babysit for and had left a five minute voicemail. FML

#22263
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38619) - you deserved it (12457)

On 02/10/2009 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by Embarrassed (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was expelled from school. By my own mother. FML

#35910
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25576) - you deserved it (32447)

On 02/13/2009 at 6:07am - misc - by Kulcha (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my girlfriend and I were up late watching tv when an infomercial for "male enhancement" came on. I grabbed for my phone to make a call when my girlfriend said "O honey, dont buy that, it's okay that you're small." I was checking my voicemails. FML

#89031
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44488) - you deserved it (5378)

On 02/20/2009 at 3:15pm - misc - by allyshah - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was writing a very important email to my college professor. I went upstairs for something and came back down to send it. I later asked him today why he hadn't responded to which he said "I'm flattered...but can't." My roommate had added "love you xxx" at the end of the email. FML

#315906
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48127) - you deserved it (6265)

On 03/14/2009 at 1:27am - misc - by dntstopmenow (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, my mother and I walked past my boyfriend, whom she's never met. After we casually greeted each other and went on our way my mother says, "He's cute. Who is he?" I paused for a second and replied, "That's my boyfriend." She then asks, "Does he know that?" FML

#532977
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59721) - you deserved it (12671)

On 03/22/2009 at 3:45pm - love - by ThanksMa (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to be the sober housemate for the first time in a while. I drove my drunk friends to the bar and back and even bought them pizza before they passed out in the living room. I get repaid by catching my wasted housemate in my room peeing all over my floor, bed, and nightstand. FML

#1415880
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50308) - you deserved it (7447)

On 04/28/2009 at 4:45am - misc - by fuckmylife (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, the police posted a description of the car of a child abductor. As everyone slowed down to read the billboard, I realized that the car's description and license plate were very similar to mine. After getting death stares from passengers, I got pulled over. Twice. FML

#1043784
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53427) - you deserved it (2003)

On 04/17/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by eyeamcool (woman) - United States (California)



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