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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was in the car with my parents' friends. I was in the back with my window down when I felt something strange hit my ear. I then realized that the person sitting in front of me was picking their scab and throwing it out the window. FML

#12411056
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26587) - you deserved it (2247)

On 08/09/2010 at 12:54pm - misc - by Scabs (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was kicked out of a Family Dollar. My mom thought it would be fun to press all the buttons on the musical ceramic cathedrals so they would all play at the same time. FML

#13788203
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19554) - you deserved it (2623)

On 11/10/2010 at 8:16am - misc - by dearprudence89 - United States

Today, my parrot won't stop repeating my boyfriend's name. The problem is we broke up days ago and my parrot won't shut up. FML

#14560374
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26737) - you deserved it (4498)

On 01/12/2011 at 11:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my husband told me the reason he'd been meeting his high school sweetheart behind my back and lying about where he was was out of respect for me. He thinks I'm ungrateful for not appreciating the lengths he's gone to to hide this. FML

#13380093
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30841) - you deserved it (2743)

On 10/09/2010 at 4:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while celebrating at my friend's birthday party, I fell down a flight of stairs, got into a fight with my flatmate, and ruined my friend's outfit after drinking too much. I'm expecting I'll need to find a new place to live tomorrow. FML

#9021553
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5158) - you deserved it (27313)

On 03/12/2010 at 11:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Swansea)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to take a short cut driving through the snow. I skidded to avoid an oncoming car and ended up in someone's garden, inches from their brand new extension. The house belonged to a police officer. FML

#14045212
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8444) - you deserved it (27031)

On 12/01/2010 at 5:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (South Lanarkshire)

Today, after staying in bed all day for a week from sickness, I get up to tell my mom I have terrible back pain and feel extremely dizzy. After curling up on the chair next to her, not being able to keep my head up for too long, she simply stares at me and says, "Can I finish my dinner now?" FML

#13720258
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20949) - you deserved it (4748)

On 11/04/2010 at 10:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, my marriage counselor told me I have the communication skills of a Lou Gehrig's patient. FML

#13691597
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8648) - you deserved it (13960)

On 11/02/2010 at 7:34pm - misc - by djangle (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, it was the hottest day of the year so I opened my sun roof. The hottest day of the year was followed by the biggest storm of the year. I forgot to close my sun roof and my car is now flooded. FML

#10815057
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11238) - you deserved it (27999)

On 05/28/2010 at 2:20am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML

#13466468
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40801) - you deserved it (3423)

On 10/16/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Shooter71 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my dad found the ugliest picture my mom has ever taken. I show it to her laughing. She said it looks like me. I looked again and it kind of does. FML

#13307467
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20849) - you deserved it (6847)

On 10/03/2010 at 7:29pm - misc - by krt - United States (Florida)

Today, I looked deep into my wife's eyes and told her how much I loved her and how much she meant to me. Her reply was "Clean your glasses." FML

#14284829
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27270) - you deserved it (3736)

On 12/21/2010 at 12:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I missed work because I was at the hospital getting treated for accidentally inhaling chlorine gas. I didn't realize that using Comet Industrial Strength Cleanser to scrub out a cat litter pan could be so hazardous. FML

#14189532
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9238) - you deserved it (21622)

On 12/13/2010 at 10:27am - health - by lakb -



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