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Today, I received a phone call at work about an emergency and I had to come home immediately. I arrived to find that no one had been hurt and the house hadn't burned down. The "emergency" was my mom ran out of milk and cigarettes. FML

#16500750
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30457) - you deserved it (2844)

On 06/04/2011 at 3:48pm - misc - by A (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I went to a concert with my new boyfriend. I had a panic attack halfway through and an ambulance picked me up. My boyfriend met my parents for the first time drunk, in the emergency room. FML

#19336064
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15954) - you deserved it (4405)

On 03/23/2012 at 11:51pm - love - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother offered to pay for my tickets to go see my girlfriend who I haven't seen for 6 months. She was happy to pay for the £130 flight, but then refused half way through the purchase because she wasn't going to "let the buggers charge £13 extra" for using her credit card. FML

#17668770
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18520) - you deserved it (2706)

On 09/05/2011 at 7:32am - misc - by Grounded (man) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)

Today, I sneezed while at the office. I felt snot shoot out, but I couldn't see anything on the tissue. I ignored it and went on with my day. When I went to the bathroom hours later, I noticed a huge wad of snot had dried onto the front of my shirt. No one told me about it. FML

#19214388
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19272) - you deserved it (3435)

On 03/04/2012 at 2:36pm - health - by breebree-0 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got my dog back from my aunt. Rather than taking him to an actual groomer, I gave him to my aunt because she needed a few extra bucks. My generosity lost me $35, and gave my dog ticks and a bad haircut. FML

#19304528
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16413) - you deserved it (4457)

On 03/18/2012 at 11:09pm - animals - by tickdog - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at the airport to pick up my mother since my baby is due soon. As she arrived, I smiled wide and opened my arms for a hug, but she walked right by me. Apparently, being pregnant makes me unrecognizable. My husband and I had to tell it her was me, her own daughter. FML

#17468026
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25666) - you deserved it (2361)

On 08/14/2011 at 6:34am - misc - by Motherly Love - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that my old roommate used to clean her goldfish bowl with my toothbrush. We lived together for six months. FML

#19287473
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18918) - you deserved it (1623)

On 03/16/2012 at 5:02am - misc - by disgusted - United States

Today, I went to the emergency room with chest pain. I didn't have a heart attack, but I now have a broken nose after passing out and face-planting in the waiting room. FML

#19952787
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16138) - you deserved it (1526)

On 07/18/2012 at 1:06am - health - by tm - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML

#19225607
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14463) - you deserved it (5650)

On 03/06/2012 at 2:20am - misc - by BlueBirdWings (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to my favorite bar after work for a drink. On my way to the porch out back, I didn't realize the sliding glass door was shut, and walked straight into it. I was stone cold sober, but the bartender refused to believe me, and cut me off before my first beer. FML

#20056910
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15429) - you deserved it (3418)

On 09/04/2012 at 12:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I'm at home, sick with walking pneumonia and a raging UTI. Every time I cough, I piss myself. I'm now having to lie on a bath towel and garbage bags until the meds kick in. FML

#20145285
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20309) - you deserved it (1263)

On 11/03/2012 at 1:34am - health - by jdch_99 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up with a hangover from hell. My clothes were stained with vomit, I was propped up on the sofa with a bowl between my knees, and my hair tied to one side. My mum was taking photos to send to Grandma. FML

#20418077
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10251) - you deserved it (35796)

On 12/24/2012 at 3:46am - misc - by chunderful202 - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, my boyfriend knocked into me with his car. I drove myself to the hospital because he couldn't stop laughing long enough to drive. FML

#20434038
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27800) - you deserved it (2557)

On 12/31/2012 at 1:13pm - misc - by anon - United States (California)



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