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Today, after a long time convincing my parents that my boyfriend is really a good guy, not only did he decide to come by the house completely drunk, but he also ended up trying to kiss my mom, thinking it was me. FML

#14263039
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25514) - you deserved it (8703)

On 12/19/2010 at 7:20pm - love - by hugme101 (woman) - Canada

Today, I accidentally left my concession card in the photocopier. I then got fined for not having a concession card on the train. I was photocopying it for a letter to get out of a fine for not having a concession card. FML

#2881369
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13204) - you deserved it (37300)

On 06/14/2009 at 9:16am - money - by LordAdam (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was sitting at the park with a friend when a small child approached us. Just as moved off the bridge to let the kid play, he asked if I would like to play the troll under the bridge. I laughed and said no thanks, to which the kid responded 'but there is nobody else ugly enough.' FML

#3285415
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46417) - you deserved it (3830)

On 06/27/2009 at 9:00pm - kids - by failure (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, my wife tried to catch the bouquet at my sister's wedding. Afterward I informed her that only single women were supposed to do that, and she replied "I know". My wife told me that she was divorcing me at my sister's wedding. FML

#3407899
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51416) - you deserved it (2264)

On 07/01/2009 at 8:58pm - love - by dwaggle (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I received an email from a temp agency trying to hire me. Suprisingly, it was the same job I was just laid off from after two years of great employment. They were trying to hire me at half my original salary. FML

#2792784
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49011) - you deserved it (2224)

On 06/11/2009 at 1:21am - work - by surfernerd6987 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was woken up at 2 in the morning by my phone ringing. As I groggily reached for it I managed to knock my fan onto my head, leaving a grate-shaped bruise. The best part? My phone wasn't ringing, I dreamed myself awake. FML

#2336807
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37605) - you deserved it (5198)

On 05/27/2009 at 7:44am - misc - by GodDamnFan (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my sister thought it would be funny to spray my face with my new tanning spray, which is only supposed to be used on arms and legs. I woke up and looked in the mirror to see an orange blotchy face staring back at me. My parents can't look at me without laughing. FML

#3762985
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36306) - you deserved it (6013)

On 07/15/2009 at 12:00am - misc - by blotchy-girl (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I sent a forward to the ladies at my office. When I scrolled down I noticed my personal emails from my best friend were attached. They go into great detail about the sex I had last night, when I was planning on dumping my boyfriend and that I suspected I had an anal fissure. FML

#2373728
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9520) - you deserved it (54989)

On 05/28/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by crazybiotch (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom slept all day. But when she got out of bed for five minutes, she told me I was a worthless piece of shit. Then she went back to bed. FML

#5419
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40684) - you deserved it (2272)

On 02/02/2009 at 1:07pm - misc - by asdf - United States (Washington)

Today, two girls invited me up to their room at 3 am. As soon as we pressed the up button on the elevator, the fire alarm went off. FML

#6093
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58913) - you deserved it (4777)

On 02/03/2009 at 9:25am - intimacy - by SoClose (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at physical therapy, the girl next to me had a blue armband. I said, "Hey, sweet iPod". She said, "Actually, I have diabetes." FML

#56080
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10240) - you deserved it (36631)

On 02/16/2009 at 8:31pm - health - by LA (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was at a bar with a friend. A guy came up to me, took my drink and drank it. I laughed and jokingly said "now, you have to buy me a drink." He said "I would rather buy your friend a drink." FML

#87320
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45833) - you deserved it (3595)

On 02/20/2009 at 11:16am - love - by darn it. (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mum came home from a business trip. My four-year-old brother, who I'd been watching, told her I was "sexing" my boyfriend a lot after I put him to bed. After lots of arguing, she banned me from seeing him and took my car away. Only much later did I realize my brother meant "texting". FML

#113033
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77353) - you deserved it (4739)

On 02/23/2009 at 11:47am - intimacy - by Megan (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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