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Today, my boss had a lengthy and obnoxiously egocentric conversation with a colleague. After she left across the office, I stood up, looked over at my colleague, and made a sarcastic "shooting myself in the head" gesture. I saw my boss staring at me over a cubicle wall as I turned around. FML

#21236078
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26004) - you deserved it (18799)

On 08/12/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by bademployee (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was in a restaurant bathroom, when another girl walked in. I have anxiety issues, and couldn't leave my stall until the other person went first. She rushed into a stall and had violent diarrhea for a good 10 minutes. FML

Today, I was so ashamed of my weight when I sat down and the suction of my thighs made a loud fart noise, I admitted to it being a fart rather than my fat rolls. FML

#21218616
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33265) - you deserved it (18208)

On 07/23/2014 at 7:24pm - health - by ThunderThighs (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boss pretty much told me that I'm too ugly to meet clients, and should stay in the office doing the paperwork. So basically, I'm a modern day Hunchback of Notre Dame. FML

#21232284
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36845) - you deserved it (3169)

On 08/08/2014 at 2:13am - work - by Anonymous - Singapore

Today, my ex-boyfriend surprised me with a gorgeous, giant stuffed tiger as a belated birthday gift. I thought it was a lovely gesture until a friend told me she had thrown it in the dumpster behind our building this morning. FML

#21226147
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34181) - you deserved it (3105)

On 07/31/2014 at 8:17pm - love - by Does this thought count? (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I arrived at the station at 7:30pm sharp for the train... which was cancelled. FML

#9
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51241) - you deserved it (14729)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:21am - misc - by RatQuiRit -

Today, I tried to pick up two girls by asking them what time it was. They burst out laughing. FML

#38
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14963) - you deserved it (48900)

On 10/25/2008 at 12:55pm - love - by SweeT -

Today, my philosophy teacher asked me about my parents. I replied that my mum was a cleaner and my dad was a bus driver. In an astonished voice, she said, "But, you're clever..." FML

#434
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29943) - you deserved it (1881)

On 12/02/2008 at 1:32am - misc - by lamb-chop - Sent from mobile version

Today, I daringly tried that fish-bath thing, where all these fish come and eat all of your skin's dead cells. I got into it, and after 15 minutes of being a human buffet, at least 20 of the fish died. FML

#1305
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30991) - you deserved it (5697)

On 01/15/2009 at 8:25pm - health - by anx133 - China (Shanghai)

Today, my best friend was crying because her boyfriend is a retard. I brought my thumb up to wipe a tear off her face, and somehow stuck it up her nose. FML

#4457
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20858) - you deserved it (9815)

On 02/01/2009 at 3:11am - love - by FractalSanity - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my tennis coach showed up to practice in an all white outfit. I exclaimed, "You're looking very white today!" He's African American. FML

#19641
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9161) - you deserved it (38747)

On 02/10/2009 at 12:59am - misc - by Tennisplayer (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I came home to find that the entire ceiling in the kitchen of my apartment had caved in due to an extremely leaky water pipe. The same water pipe maintenance said they had fixed three days ago. FML

Today, I returned home from college and saw a framed picture of my parents and my younger sister on an elephant in an exotic jungle. I pointed to the picture and asked my mom, "Is this some photoshop job?" She responded, "No, we went to Thailand for a family trip, didn't we tell you?" FML

#86332
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68578) - you deserved it (3070)

On 02/20/2009 at 4:24am - misc - by OutoftheLoop (woman) - China (Beijing)



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