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Today, I was at the library. I went near the computer section when I saw this man cursing and pounding his fists on a computer. He left. I thought I'd check it out. As I sat down, a librarian came over with the security guard and pointed at me. I'm now being fined for destroying public property. FML

#1722072
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47332) - you deserved it (14003)

On 05/07/2009 at 4:27pm - misc - by weliveanddie14 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML

#3929257
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11936) - you deserved it (54340)

On 07/21/2009 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my mom put a candle on in the living room. She told the family "how much she loved it!" My mom then went on the tell us that my dad got it for her and it must have been some cheap candle. I bought the candle as a gift for her on her birthday. Thanks mom. FML

#5808379
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21738) - you deserved it (2613)

On 10/12/2009 at 11:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mother said she trusted me enough to go with me for my first drive in my new car. As soon as we got in the car, she started hyperventilating and screaming we're going to crash. I didn't even start the engine. FML

#5758309
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32583) - you deserved it (2479)

On 10/10/2009 at 1:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (West Berkshire)

Today, I had to meet with my landlord to organise when he was coming to look at my flat and decide whether I get my deposit back. In the time it took to see him, my friend drank a bottle of vodka and vomited all over my room and knocked the window through. My landlord is coming in the morning. FML

#4941541
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29253) - you deserved it (4703)

On 08/30/2009 at 10:51pm - misc - by Robbins (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I noticed my dishwasher wouldn't turn on. After shelling out $120 call-out fee, I was a little miffed when the technician walked in, pressed the 'unlock' function and walked out again. FML

#4594322
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7759) - you deserved it (47593)

On 08/17/2009 at 4:31am - misc - by veevee (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I realized I'm missing my diamond earrings. After ripping apart the vacuum bag and exhausting all other options I'm pretty sure my new cat ate them. I'm going to go sift through several days worth of cat shit now. FML

#5652102
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29010) - you deserved it (5702)

On 10/04/2009 at 10:19pm - animals - by FellingShitty (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while studying in the middle of the night, my dad came home drunk. I helped him to the sofa and after clearing up his mess, he started going on about how useless my sister Vanessa was, and how good a daughter I am. I am Vanessa. FML

#4471647
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47765) - you deserved it (2724)

On 08/12/2009 at 8:57am - misc - by dkajxu (woman) - Singapore

Today, on my wedding day, when they said "you may kiss the bride", I swung my wife over in the romantic fashion and went in for the kiss. Unfortunately my hands were sweaty as I was nervous and she slipped under my grip. She fell and was knocked unconscious in front of hundreds of people. FML

#4543711
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46703) - you deserved it (17561)

On 08/15/2009 at 3:50am - love - by slipperyhands (man) - United States (California)

Today, I saw the girl I had started dating changed her Facebook relationship status to "In a relationship". Naturally, I changed mine too. The next time I logged on, she had commented, "Really?! Who?!" She was serious. FML

#4641799
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38848) - you deserved it (5289)

On 08/18/2009 at 10:44pm - love - by Lies (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was on cloud nine when the beautiful waitress I frequently ordered takeaways from told me she didn't need to take my name as she remembers me from before. When I got my food I saw the sales slip. On it she had written, "Cheeseburger - Fries - Coke - nerdy guy with bad haircut." FML

#5850117
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30605) - you deserved it (5059)

On 10/16/2009 at 11:08am - love - by nerd (man) - Singapore

Today, I took a smoke break at work and I noticed a huge zit on my face. I used the reflection from a window to take care of the problem and then realized that there was a staff meeting taking place on the other side. FML

#5947832
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9453) - you deserved it (34738)

On 10/22/2009 at 7:05pm - misc - by JC (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of almost a year invited me over to dinner at his house. Before leaving, I called him to let him know I was on my way. Just as he begins to tell me he'll call me back, I hear another girl in the background say, "Why don't you just tell her you're busy?" FML

#6416046
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33276) - you deserved it (2346)

On 11/23/2009 at 12:09am - love - by apparentlyhesbusy (woman) - United States (California)



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