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Today, my friend told me she'd lost her notebook filled with crucial notes for our finals. She asked if she could borrow mine and copy my notes. She then lost my notebook too. FML

#20669510
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40638) - you deserved it (10203)

On 05/17/2013 at 6:28pm - misc - by well great. - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my neighbors called the police and said that they saw, through the window, a suspicious person in my house doing something to my piano. The "suspicious person" was me, in my own house, playing my own piano. FML

#20678725
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41042) - you deserved it (2390)

On 05/21/2013 at 9:57pm - misc - by pianoplayer (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was using a restroom with automatic sinks and toilets. I assumed the paper towel dispensers were automatic too. I stood there waving my hands like an idiot before a girl walked in, pulled a lever, and made paper towels come out for me. FML

#20682540
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19408) - you deserved it (35052)

On 05/23/2013 at 8:24pm - misc - by paper towel virgin - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was on the tram, when an elderly couple got on. I stood up to give them room to sit together, but as I stood up, the tram set off and I went flying, knocking the elderly gentleman over. FML

#20707500
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45456) - you deserved it (3748)

On 06/05/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by Bookworm (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my co-worker thought it would be funny to tell her husband that she cheated on him with me. I'm scared to death and I don't dare to go out by myself. FML

#20754723
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36582) - you deserved it (3743)

On 06/29/2013 at 6:19pm - misc - by unluckydude - Colombia (Boyaca)

Today, my water broke. I called my mom, who had agreed to watch my other two kids while I went to the hospital. When I asked her to come over, she just said, "Sorry, now isn't a good time." FML

#20781242
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45486) - you deserved it (3096)

On 07/14/2013 at 12:32am - health - by Upset Mommy - United States

Today, my older brother told me that the only reason I like cats is because they control minds. I laughed. He was serious. FML

#20771105
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32919) - you deserved it (3127)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:26pm - animals - by Zoey_M - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, an old lady steamrolled over my foot with her wheelchair, then laughed as she slowly rolled away, leaving my toes in ruins. FML

#20788409
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38041) - you deserved it (2996)

On 07/17/2013 at 1:38pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mother yelled and yelled at me until I apologized to our cat for not petting him when he sat on my lap. FML

#20825844
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41003) - you deserved it (4507)

On 08/07/2013 at 4:55pm - misc - by wekasdjkasldasdkasdzcawqe (woman) - Sweden

Today, I walked in on my husband putting my anti-wrinkle cream on his balls. He said, "I thought it'd help." FML

#20822001
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42969) - you deserved it (3637)

On 08/05/2013 at 12:41pm - intimacy - by Serum - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was out jogging. As I took a rest to have a drink of water, a car pulled onto the sidewalk and bumped into me. Not just any car; my dad's car. He then drove away. FML

#20844605
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39106) - you deserved it (3288)

On 08/19/2013 at 12:00pm - misc - by FamilyLoving - United States (New York)

Today, I had an awful day and angrily threw a glass at the wall. Needless to say, I didn't feel like cleaning it up, and I took a nap, intending to do it later. I thought I would remember the bits of glass everywhere when I woke up. I didn't, but my feet soon did. FML

#20838843
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19039) - you deserved it (58884)

On 08/15/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Otago)

Today, while discussing career prospects with my mom, she suggested that I become a penis puppeteer, because "Let's face it, you play with it 24/7. Why not make a career out of it?" Yeah, thanks. FML

#20838688
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34839) - you deserved it (11569)

On 08/15/2013 at 12:49pm - work - by kaynotentirelywrong (man) - Canada (Quebec)



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