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Today, I was jogging around the neighborhood when I saw an old man on his porch. Being friendly, I waved at him as I ran by. Apparently his idea of greeting someone is pelting them with stones. FML

#18087058
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23068) - you deserved it (2496)

On 10/27/2011 at 4:06am - misc - by unlucky - United States (Texas)

Today, I was working on the computer when my dad walks in, pointing his finger at me like a gun. Before I could even ask, it turns out he was aiming a rubber band at me. The doctor says I'll be able to take off my eye patch in a couple of days. FML

#18549843
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31535) - you deserved it (2396)

On 12/19/2011 at 12:03am - health - by suhleedah18 - United States

Today, my future mother-in-law told me she thought I was severely allergic to cigarette smoke. That hasn't stopped her from chain-smoking around me for the last 3 years. FML

#19447044
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20737) - you deserved it (1775)

On 04/10/2012 at 11:49pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my grandmother's excuse for not going to my college graduation was because she'd already bought her bingo card. FML

#16514185
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28676) - you deserved it (2379)

On 06/05/2011 at 2:15pm - misc - by xXEndlesslullabyXx - United States (New York)

Today, while trying to prove a point to my mom, I learned that bird seed tastes better than her cooking. FML

#18765648
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23462) - you deserved it (3404)

On 01/10/2012 at 10:34am - misc - by NJ <3 - United States

Today, my mom admitted that she always makes me put away the dishes because my obsessive compulsive tendencies force me to arrange the glasses and silverware by size, just the way she likes them. FML

#17747814
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24877) - you deserved it (4683)

On 09/14/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by Awesome. (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was so excited to hear my phone get a message that I jumped out of my seat. It was the TV, advertising texting plans. FML

#19374122
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19115) - you deserved it (4670)

On 03/30/2012 at 1:10am - misc - by Anon (woman) - New Zealand

Today, there was a mandatory staff-wide "cleaning party" for a corporate inspection. I was assigned the outside bar which is infested with full-grown roaches with wings. FML

#19482004
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22403) - you deserved it (1984)

On 04/17/2012 at 12:26am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I left to go home for Christmas holidays. I got 3 hours away and realised I forgot the presents. Along with the engagement ring I was going to give to my girlfriend. FML

#18572612
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25727) - you deserved it (12206)

On 12/21/2011 at 6:36pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend came over to cheer me up after I'd had a sleepless night. He thought it would be a good time to propose. Unfortunately, it coincided with me yawning. FML

#19039912
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23641) - you deserved it (4570)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:37am - love - by ohgodwhy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the gnat infestation in my dorm room was not caused by the recent cool weather, but rather the rotten pear I found under my roommates bed. FML

#19245415
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19968) - you deserved it (2092)

On 03/09/2012 at 1:12pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom and siblings got into a fight. Being generally quiet and non-confrontational, I stayed out of it. Shortly thereafter, I was yelled at by my mother for being "ungrateful" and "disrespectful." I still don't know what I did wrong. FML

#18781319
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24600) - you deserved it (2172)

On 01/12/2012 at 12:00am - kids - by tiredoffamilydinners (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned that all it takes to anger my sister's new parrot is to walk past its perch. I also learned that a beak over two inches long is very capable of inflicting injuries that require stitches. FML

#18144949
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25509) - you deserved it (3892)

On 11/03/2011 at 2:22am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Australia



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