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Today, I went to get a trim. However, follow-up damage control at home afterward shouldn't really be necessary on a fifty dollar haircut. FML

#13429842
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18123) - you deserved it (4907)

On 10/13/2010 at 1:28am - misc - by grow_fasterrr - (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, for the first time, a good looking guy was in my yoga class. Today also marked the first time I farted during yoga class. FML

#14151880
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29947) - you deserved it (5157)

On 12/10/2010 at 8:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went over to welcome this new couple to our subdivision with a bottle of wine and muffins. I told them I liked what they were doing with the place, then asked them when they had moved in. They replied, "Two years ago." FML

#14200955
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6479) - you deserved it (32270)

On 12/14/2010 at 10:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML

#13269256
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26440) - you deserved it (3927)

On 09/30/2010 at 9:55pm - love - by dontask (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was at my local McDonald's having a leak when an extremely intoxicated man stumbled in, pulled down his pants, and started to pee on my shoes. FML

#13550544
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29538) - you deserved it (3047)

On 10/22/2010 at 2:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (More og Romsdal)

Today, I was driving in stop and go traffic and passed two accidents in the process. I got nervous and decided to change routes to avoid getting hit. As I was trying to find an alternative route on my GPS, I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML

#15333095
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8154) - you deserved it (50912)

On 03/16/2011 at 2:54am - misc - by dumbluck - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to pick me up, throw me over his shoulder and take me to the bedroom. Little did he know that he literally threw me over his shoulder, and I face-planted on the ground. FML

#14194626
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28293) - you deserved it (2818)

On 12/13/2010 at 8:04pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I returned from vacation. Because of rain, I spent 3 days sitting in a hotel room, watching a TV with bad reception. I'm now less relaxed that if I'd have just stayed home, because that wouldn't have cost me $500, and my TV has more than 15 channels. So much for my first vacation in 5 years. FML

#13584749
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23261) - you deserved it (4674)

On 10/25/2010 at 12:22am - misc - by not_relaxed (man) - United States (California)

Today, while working at a hospital, I told a patient to smile for the camera when taking an xray. His response was, "I have Bell's Palsy and haven't smiled in 5 years." FML

#13601804
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24232) - you deserved it (7112)

On 10/26/2010 at 12:50pm - health - by oaksac191 - United States (New York)

Today, I was playing with my four month old daughter, flying her in the air like an airplane. I open my mouth saying 'Weeee', and she vomited on my face. FML

#13734047
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24764) - you deserved it (14311)

On 11/06/2010 at 1:18am - kids - by Username - France

Today, while at my mom's birthday dinner, I started to pretend to drum with one hand, using my left leg as the drums. Everybody stared at me and started to yell. Now they all think I was masturbating. FML

#14090215
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22909) - you deserved it (10575)

On 12/05/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realised that every morning my girlfriend gets me to help her put on a locket her ex-boyfriend bought her on Valentine's Day. FML

#12752229
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31736) - you deserved it (4164)

On 08/26/2010 at 5:16am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, seeing Ozzy Osbourne live for the first time, I was trying to get the perfect photo of the entire band on stage. That is, until a sudden burst of pyrotechnics startled me, and I gave myself a black eye from the camera hitting me in the face. FML

#13982086
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18722) - you deserved it (8573)

On 11/26/2010 at 12:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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