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Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML

#17678479
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23450) - you deserved it (4367)

On 09/06/2011 at 4:06am - work - by Shamed - United Kingdom

Today, I opened my new clothing store. My only customer was my mom and the only reason she came in was to tell me that someone stole my sign. FML

#16307240
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35845) - you deserved it (3251)

On 05/23/2011 at 12:26am - work - by 11lyss1 -

Today, my mother told me she wanted me to get an exorcism. Yes, she was serious. I'm Jewish. FML

#16999311
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27417) - you deserved it (3291)

On 07/06/2011 at 11:21am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, after not receiving my paycheck for over a month, I confronted my boss about it. His response? "You still work here?" FML

#17023007
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34632) - you deserved it (3440)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:10am - work - by outofajob - United States

Today, I had a bunch of friends over for a party. My mom came stumbling into my room, crying about how she was officially menopausal, and that I was going to "die an only child." FML

#17687810
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24113) - you deserved it (1909)

On 09/07/2011 at 11:11am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was knocked into a wall by a high-pressure water cannon suddenly kicking in. I was only going to the corner store to buy some chocolate. Probably serves me right for not noticing a small riot due to a thumping hangover. FML

#17474756
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22346) - you deserved it (6442)

On 08/14/2011 at 10:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, just like every other day, I was woken up 2 hours earlier than I needed to be, by the alarm belonging to my upstairs neighbors. They won't wake up until their real alarm goes off: me, pounding the walls and yelling in frustration. FML

#18272424
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23594) - you deserved it (1911)

On 11/17/2011 at 12:39pm - misc - by tnh - United States

Today, I went to see my grandfather in hospital, to see how well he's recovering from his stroke. He asked who I was. After I told him I'm his grand-daughter, his head almost rolled off his neck in disappointment. FML

Today, I decided to use hand sanitizer to mask the smell of my armpits at work. Not only did it intensify the stench, my boss thinks I have a drinking problem, because I vaguely smelled of alcohol. I was too embarrassed to explain. FML

#20063186
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8362) - you deserved it (20828)

On 09/08/2012 at 1:26pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my dad walked in on me using the bathroom. After rushing out, he yelled at me through the door for not locking it. He made up the "no locking the doors inside the house" rule. FML

#18497934
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21829) - you deserved it (2698)

On 12/12/2011 at 9:04pm - misc - by unknown - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was so busy checking my phone for live bus arrival times I didn't notice the bus pull up, let the people beside me on and drive away. FML

#19149317
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6979) - you deserved it (38477)

On 02/23/2012 at 8:54pm - misc - by thisguy - Canada

Today, I came to the realisation that the longest relationship I've had by far is the one I have with my hemorrhoids. FML

#19694480
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15928) - you deserved it (2718)

On 05/28/2012 at 5:17pm - health - by Phil (man) - Canada

Today, a cop turned his lights and siren on to pull me over. I pulled into a parking lot and got a ticket. It wasn't until the cop pulled away that I realized that I'd pulled into, and interrupted, an on-going funeral visitation. FML

#19847830
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21145) - you deserved it (4669)

On 06/25/2012 at 11:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)



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