Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, I walked in on my porn addicted roommate watching a gynecologist exam online. He asked me to watch it with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35938) - you deserved it (2954)
On 02/03/2009 at 4:38pm - intimacy - by Escape! (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I discovered a drawer in my house of chocolates, cookies, and baked goods. When I asked my sister what the drawer was, she told me that my mom thought it would be a good idea to hide the fattening foods from me. My entire family had known about the food drawer except me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20795) - you deserved it (5821)
On 02/05/2009 at 10:24am - health - by Tori (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I thought I was going on a date. About 20 minutes into it, after giving her my arm to hold (like a true gentleman) it came up in conversation that my brother is gay. Her response: "oh, so both you and your brother are gay?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28027) - you deserved it (1935)
On 02/07/2009 at 6:33pm - misc - by max (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I received a box in the mail from my mom which I assumed was a care package. It was a scale to encourage me to lose weight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25879) - you deserved it (4388)
On 02/16/2009 at 7:26pm - health - by Loot (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I got to Costa Rica for my first vacation in five years. I immediately rented a scooter for the week after checking into my prepaid, no refunds, hotel. On the way back from the rental agency I hit a pothole and broke my leg and ripped the skin off my foot. I'm flying home tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34936) - you deserved it (2549)
On 02/20/2009 at 9:20pm - misc - by Dale (man) - Costa Rica (San Jose)
Today, I was DJ'ing a wedding. The groom wanted a song played for his grandma and grandpa. I announce over the microphone for his grandparents to come to the dance floor for a special song. Turns out his grandparents have been dead for over a year and the song was supposed to be in dedication. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41429) - you deserved it (7669)
On 02/23/2009 at 7:04pm - misc - by holladaddy (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was meeting friends for dinner at an Indian restaurant. I was waiting for the group to arrive and our table to be ready. An Indian man approached me smiling, so I said "We're not ready for our table yet". Then I realized it was my friend's boyfriend who I've met several times. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6637) - you deserved it (52282)
On 03/02/2009 at 9:22am - misc - by neelloc83 - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I took my new laptop into my house from my car, thinking it would be a too much of a target for kids grabbing it. I came home tonight to find my door kicked in, my laptop gone and my TV ripped from the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27647) - you deserved it (1704)
On 10/08/2009 at 9:31am - money - by wheatsnake (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was working at a children's play centre, and my stomach was twisting and turning. Thinking no one was around, I let out a small fart, only to turn and see a little girl running to her mom yelling, "Mommy-mommy that lady just farted and it sounded like daddy!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (9092) - you deserved it (2534)
On 11/25/2009 at 2:36am - kids - by n/a - United States
Today, my mother had 'the talk' with me about sex. I spent the entire time confused as to what brought this up, until she mentioned she had found a used condom in the backseat of the car. I haven't had any action in it, and have no idea whose it was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13384) - you deserved it (1242)
On 10/11/2009 at 9:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I went to a wedding with my family. While the maid of honor was giving her non-heartfelt, three sentence speech, my mom and I started talking about how lame her speech was. When I turned around to look at my mom, I saw the camera recording the speech behind her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7093) - you deserved it (30196)
On 08/03/2009 at 2:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was just about to do an important presentation in front of my boss and co-workers. When, without warning I tripped in front of everyone and knocked a VERY expensive computer off the table. How do I know it was so expensive? I'm paying for it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23088) - you deserved it (3310)
On 10/05/2009 at 7:25pm - work - by ProneToBlondeMoments (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was delivering packages as usual for work. I was dropping off a large letter to a hot girl. Before I turned to leave the girl opened her mouth to say something. Instead, she just vomited all over me. Her letter was my first delivery of the day. I had to finish my job covered in puke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30031) - you deserved it (1500)
On 08/11/2009 at 7:15pm - work - by FedExMan (man) - United States (Maryland)
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
