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Today, I was going to do some laundry, with the washer and dryer I bought off of Craigslist for 150 dollars. The washer leaks and the dryer doesn't dry. So I called the guy and left an angry message about how the washer flooded my kitchen. In fact I just forgot to hook up the drain hose. FML

#3639163
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5277) - you deserved it (55844)

On 07/10/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found some oversized-strawberry-spree candies in my pantry. They were delicious and I munched on them through out the day. I ended up in and out, but mostly in, the bathroom in the dead hours of the night experiencing the wonders and effectiveness of Fruit Flavored Fiber pills. FML

#2367025
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12978) - you deserved it (42948)

On 05/28/2009 at 3:14am - health - by KKimrae_ness (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took my iPod to Walmart to replace the battery. They tell me to call Apple. I go home again and call Apple. They tell me to call Walmart. I call Walmart. They tell me to bring it in. FML

#13539571
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29710) - you deserved it (3517)

On 10/21/2010 at 6:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, for the first time in over a year, my mother actually called me. I excitedly picked up the phone. All I heard was rustling; her purse dialed me. FML

#2851443
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49563) - you deserved it (2822)

On 06/13/2009 at 3:10am - love - by slukaa (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years sent me a text messages saying, "Don't worry I'm gonna break up with her soon. Love you." FML

#10627
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62415) - you deserved it (2640)

On 02/05/2009 at 5:29pm - misc - by nycgirl424 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I called the florist and ordered a flower arrangement for my grandma, who I was told was sick. I said I didn't know what to get her, so just to send her something nice. I got a call from my mom calling me an inconsiderate bastard. They sent my grandma forget-me-nots. She has Alzheimers. FML

#117948
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44818) - you deserved it (7015)

On 02/23/2009 at 9:22pm - misc - by Originality18 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted me to be her first and last...with plenty of people in between. FML

#102962
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65018) - you deserved it (5165)

On 02/22/2009 at 10:10am - intimacy - by Charles (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I told my friend I hadn't had a period in 5 months. She asked me if I was pregnant. When I asked her if I looked 5 months pregant, she replied by saying "is that supposed to be a trick question?" FML

#196534
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45546) - you deserved it (16578)

On 03/03/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by booyouwhoree (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my brother's new girlfriend, who is blind, asked to feel my face so she could tell what I look like. She said I was "unique". A blind chick just told me I was ugly. FML

#267398
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60207) - you deserved it (4916)

On 03/11/2009 at 12:45am - misc - by GreenScar (man) - United States (California)

Today, I told my boyfriend "we need to talk". He said "i know". So we met after school, and he said he was ok with me breaking up with him, that he wasn't that into me either. He said all that before I could tell him that my parents wanted to meet him. FML

#318032
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67040) - you deserved it (9819)

On 03/14/2009 at 5:46am - love - by knee2tak (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my two year old cousin was having a temper tantrum. I decided to give him a flashlight because playing with it usually distracts him. It didn't. Instead, he hit me in the face with it as hard as possible, leaving a bruise. FML

#940357
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36648) - you deserved it (23148)

On 04/12/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my roommate hooked up with a guy she met at a party. After telling me about it, she says to me, "Maybe next time we go out we'll hit someone over the head and drag him back here for you." Apparently the only way I can get a guy is if he's unconscious. FML

#1378715
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44824) - you deserved it (4757)

On 04/27/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I called my mom for the first time in a few weeks, just to chat because I miss her. When she picked up, the first thing she said was, "Why are you calling? What's wrong? Do you have swine flu??" When I told her that I didn't, and I just wanted to chat, she hung up. FML

#1513141
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53993) - you deserved it (3891)

On 05/01/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States (Indiana)



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