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Today, I found out my friend has been texting my long distance boyfriend more than I do. When I confronted her about it, she confessed that it was because they had been planning a surprise appearance for me. I've never been surprised before, and I ruined my own surprise. FML

#4517705
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16675) - you deserved it (43695)

On 08/14/2009 at 1:29am - misc - by neverbeensurprised (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a friend asked me if I could help him set up the stage for his wedding. Feeling honored that he considered me a close enough friend to aid him on his special day, I agreed to help. Turns out we aren't so close. I was asked to leave after I was done because I hadn't actually been invited. FML

#4099565
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48719) - you deserved it (2369)

On 07/28/2009 at 2:34am - misc - by partypooper (man) - United States (California)

Today, I'm being evicted from my apartment for not paying rent. My father is the on-site landlord. Meaning I now have to move my stuff downstairs into his place and hear every day how I'm a failure. FML

#4971137
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14066) - you deserved it (42019)

On 09/01/2009 at 3:30am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I made the "Good luck, We'll miss you!" sign for my own going away party. FML

#4529563
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48013) - you deserved it (5127)

On 08/14/2009 at 4:46pm - misc - by loverpants (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got a new cell phone. I was unable to retrieve my old contact list from my old phone, so I sent out a mass email asking my friends to "Give me your contact info, unless you don't want me to text/call you!" No one is responding. FML

#5390873
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31928) - you deserved it (11387)

On 09/21/2009 at 9:28am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work, I fell asleep. This is how I discovered that when I'm sleeping, and am scared awake by my boss with an air horn, I yelp louder than a terrier and piss my pants. FML

#4173931
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10239) - you deserved it (44360)

On 07/31/2009 at 1:25am - work - by pisspantsjob (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at the Salvation Army when I saw a wheelchair in the miscellaneous aisle. I thought it would be fun to ride around in it. As I was wheeling it back to where I found it, I made it back just as it's owner was hobbling out of the dressing room. FML

#5703197
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7281) - you deserved it (48616)

On 10/07/2009 at 1:58pm - misc - by imok (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I told my girlfriend over MSN that we had to talk. I log on to facebook and the first thing I see is that she changed our relationship from "In a Relationship" to "It's Complicated." FML

#5923458
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25522) - you deserved it (10240)

On 10/21/2009 at 12:07am - love - by wtfrelationship (man) - Singapore

Today, my three-year-old decided to dump the entire contents of her cereal box onto the kitchen floor because she was looking for a "prize." The only prize we found was a huge dead cockroach, which she promptly stuck in her mouth. FML

#6013490
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32386) - you deserved it (3304)

On 10/26/2009 at 8:42pm - kids - by laxie (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I told a lady that came into my clothing store that I thought her abstract looking necklace was pretty. She responded, "Oh... Thats actually a pipe that goes into my lung." FML

#5862542
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29519) - you deserved it (7735)

On 10/17/2009 at 4:45am - misc - by oopsjsp90 (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got a letter confirming I had dropped out of college. I received this letter shortly after completing the 10th essay I had finished this week as a result of me deciding to finally apply myself to my schoolwork. Turns out that while dropping a class, I checked Drop All instead of Drop 1. FML

#6122684
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16968) - you deserved it (37581)

On 11/02/2009 at 5:35pm - misc - by Rman (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to see the cast list for the new musical I'm in. I didn't get the part I wanted, and instead I got the part of one of the suitors. Interestingly, they made me the suitor to my ex. And the guy she leaves me for at the end of the musical is the guy she left me for in real life. FML

#6298620
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40635) - you deserved it (2653)

On 11/14/2009 at 7:59am - love - by Indoraptor (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was laughing at a story of a girl who had dropped her cellphone in a hottub and ruined it. As I was feeling pretty good about myself, I then realized that my cellphone was in the pocket of a sweater that I had just thrown in the washer 20 minutes prior. FML

#6365163
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5846) - you deserved it (41755)

On 11/19/2009 at 2:36am - misc - by Cellphonetroubles - Canada (Alberta)



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

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