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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my boyfriend and I compared our No Shave November body hair. This is how I found out that my legs are hairier than his. FML

#21299788
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29567) - you deserved it (7664)

On 11/15/2014 at 8:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend laid his head on my bare chest and said, "You're like my mother." FML

#21229751
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45538) - you deserved it (4177)

On 08/05/2014 at 12:40am - love - by motherlover (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend told me that my mom paid him to date me. FML

#21322112
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39303) - you deserved it (3158)

On 12/22/2014 at 2:11pm - love - by koolkat9 - United States (Indiana)

Today, I woke up to the lovely sounds of goats having escaped their pen and climbed onto the roof. Again. FML

Today, I got more pleasure from itching the bed bug bites from sleeping over at my boyfriend's house than I got from actually sleeping with him. FML

#21255435
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38601) - you deserved it (5471)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:38pm - love - by Itchy Missy (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got suspended from work after getting caught reading a work-related FML. Irony is funny, but it doesn't pay the bills. FML

#21226986
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35273) - you deserved it (17531)

On 08/01/2014 at 6:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I learned I'm allergic to the 5-month-old kitten we got 3 days ago. It loves me, follows me everywhere and sleeps on my lap in the evenings. FML

#21310909
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33574) - you deserved it (3503)

On 12/03/2014 at 6:24pm - animals - by crazy cat lady - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I'm old enough to be looking at houses to buy, but not old enough to get past the idea that they might be affordable because they're haunted. FML

#21300362
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27863) - you deserved it (5814)

On 11/16/2014 at 10:07pm - misc - by boo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while working as a barista, a customer yelled about her muffins and butter not being ready since she only had a "short time to eat". There were 7 tip giving customers ahead of her, but I rushed her order. She gave no tip and stayed for over an hour. FML

#21211312
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42279) - you deserved it (5065)

On 07/16/2014 at 10:46pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I saw a customer wandering around, looking confused. I went over and kindly asked if I could help him find anything. He said no, but that he'd help me find the teeth he'd knock out of my mouth if I didn't get lost. FML

#21248418
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37480) - you deserved it (3178)

On 08/30/2014 at 11:14am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, a new fire alarm system is being installed in my building. Not only does the alarm go off incessantly, but the elevators stop running when it happens. I live on the 12th floor. FML

Today, my roommate asked for my opinion of her new painting. The same painting I hand-painted for over ten hours. She apparently thought it was a gift. She won't give it back. FML

#21251580
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40289) - you deserved it (3351)

On 09/04/2014 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend. He said it was because he lived 2 hours away, but I think the ultrasound photos his other girlfriend posted proudly on his Facebook wall are the real reason. FML

#21260092
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46530) - you deserved it (4284)

On 09/17/2014 at 3:48pm - love - by kitkat (woman) - United States



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