Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I attended an elderly man's funeral. As I approached the casket his wife said, "Thank you for coming." I replied with, "No, thank you." FML

#18903193
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9751) - you deserved it (25808)

On 01/24/2012 at 10:40pm - misc - by me - Canada

Today, my parents came to visit me. I bought boxers and cologne to make it look like I had a man here. I've been single since I moved away. FML

#17866876
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10873) - you deserved it (24789)

On 09/29/2011 at 9:33pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after our old roommate left because he was too dirty for us to live with anymore, we found out that our new roommate has "borrowed" our shampoo, towel, toilet paper, liquor, without replacing them. I wish we still only had to clean up. FML

#17506977
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20958) - you deserved it (3861)

On 08/18/2011 at 2:59am - misc - by upset room mate - United States (Texas)

Today, I found my "lost" bicycle in my best friend's garage. I've been having to catch two buses to get to work for the past few months. FML

#18029940
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23852) - you deserved it (2568)

On 10/20/2011 at 7:51am - misc - by jwhizzle - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while trying to get my phone to charge, I shoved in the cable harder and harder and tried to wobble it so my phone would charge. After snapping the USB input from the force, I saw the plug was switched off. FML

#18106914
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6266) - you deserved it (38434)

On 10/29/2011 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Poole)

Today, I got stuck driving behind a rather large motorcyclist on a one way road for 30 miles. For those 30 miles, I had a full view of his back fat rolls and butt crack. FML

#18466137
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24077) - you deserved it (3411)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:43am - misc - by O__o (woman) - United States

Today, my mom told me that she rather wait for the city bus all day, than allow me to give her a ride. FML

#20052248
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16009) - you deserved it (3112)

On 09/01/2012 at 9:58am - misc - by Chucho - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML

#19873141
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18430) - you deserved it (2123)

On 06/30/2012 at 9:00pm - misc - by pissed off -

Today, I told a customer that we don't do refunds. He responded by throwing his wallet at my face and accusing me of stealing it. FML

#19187266
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24916) - you deserved it (2116)

On 02/29/2012 at 2:47am - work - by wallets - United States

Today, a hobo threw up on my car while at a red light. He then asked me for money. FML

#19105006
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25837) - you deserved it (2155)

On 02/18/2012 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after weeks of sorting, inspecting, and waiting, my high school's yearbooks were distributed. I'd searched carefully for photo errors and was proud to say there were none. That is, until someone told me that a boy on the last page was flipping the camera the bird. FML

#19642956
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16869) - you deserved it (4142)

On 05/18/2012 at 5:50pm - misc - by ooh cat - United States (California)

Today, while at my cosmetics job, an elderly lady came up to me asking for a product. I told her we had a smaller size and a larger size for a better deal. She told me she wanted the smaller size because she'd "probably be dead" before she finished that one. I laughed. She was serious. FML

#19764407
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23853) - you deserved it (4652)

On 06/10/2012 at 4:47am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my dad found a couple of coins on the floor next to my desk, and gave me a lecture about how money doesn't grow on trees and how irresponsible I am when it comes to money. They were Chuck E. Cheese tokens. FML

#19585247
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20887) - you deserved it (2317)

On 05/07/2012 at 12:12am - money - by rofindie (man) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • Sidonie's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! In this week's edition, some pedalos, some kittens, a bunch of gypsy singers, some ponytails, a crooner, a house that looks like Hitler, a joke about George W. Bush's cocaine habit and a brilliant…

Thursday 19 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: