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Today, I put aftershave on my fingers to encourage myself to stop biting my nails. I absentmindedly rubbed my eye a few minutes later. It burnt like hell. FML

#15102552
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11191) - you deserved it (31603)

On 02/24/2011 at 2:32pm - health - by Steve - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing with my pet rabbit when my boyfriend discovered poop on his lap. As he brushed it off, I reminded him that there are a lot worse things in the world than rabbit poop. Almost as if on cue, my rabbit peed on both of us. FML

#14497989
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11707) - you deserved it (18395)

On 01/07/2011 at 3:22pm - misc - by RabbitOwner - United States

Today, I was driving when I saw a spider hanging from the ceiling of my car. I'm terrified of spiders, so I was watching it instead the road. When I looked back at the road, I had just enough time to swerve to miss the fire hydrant but not the tree. Even the cop laughed at me. FML

#14552215
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10536) - you deserved it (27621)

On 01/12/2011 at 8:29am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my power went out due to a huge snow storm. I was in desperate need of candles and flashlights. I had to walk to the store since the roads were closed. I walked 4 miles in the blizzard. When I got home, the power came back on. FML

#14727307
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25625) - you deserved it (7564)

On 01/27/2011 at 12:11am - misc - by iamlauraheremecry (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I watched my grandfather try and park his car inside the storage area for shopping carts, thinking it was a parking space. FML

#14934394
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24786) - you deserved it (3104)

On 02/11/2011 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my sister and I had a bonding moment. It consisted of me plucking her chin hairs. FML

#15083681
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20257) - you deserved it (5098)

On 02/22/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by Taylor (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was supposed to go on a date. I have been playing solitaire the whole night waiting for him. Out of 15 games, I've won one. FML

#16842915
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29169) - you deserved it (4529)

On 06/25/2011 at 12:30am - love - by yourmomsabitch (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was driving when I saw someone pulled over on the side of the road. Wanting to help, I pulled over. In so doing, I ran over a nail, which popped my tire. The guy had just pulled over to pee. FML

#17973264
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24459) - you deserved it (5712)

On 10/13/2011 at 3:27am - misc - by happyshit (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while at my dorm, I experienced a vomit-inducing migraine. In my hurry to get to the bathroom to puke, I couldn't find a pair of shoes. I urgently needed the toilet, so I braved the communal bathroom barefoot. As I opened the stall door, I stepped in someone else's fresh vomit. FML

#15514650
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32597) - you deserved it (3802)

On 03/27/2011 at 1:55pm - health - by hellosir - United States

Today, I was walking through my kitchen when I discovered a weak spot in the floor. Tomorrow, I'm going to have to fix the giant hole caused when I put my foot through it. FML

#16080976
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23883) - you deserved it (4382)

On 05/07/2011 at 5:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was fired from the trucking company I work for, due to numerous complaints about my reckless driving. I don't even do driving work there, but my ex keeps calling in to report me, and my boss wanted the calls to stop. FML

#15285580
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36095) - you deserved it (2972)

On 03/12/2011 at 6:18pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years asked my dad if he could marry me, and my dad agreed. He then tells me that he's not going to propose for maybe another year at least, he "just wanted to get that out of the way." FML

#18610596
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27132) - you deserved it (3151)

On 12/25/2011 at 8:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I added "a road sign" to my ever-growing list of 'Things which have hit my car as a result of the wind.' FML

#18465867
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21228) - you deserved it (2784)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:05am - misc - by it'sabitwindy - United States



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