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Today, I was ecstatic after spending the night with my longtime crush, when he told me he felt something. I poured my heart and soul out to him, confessing my love for him too. Unfortunately, he was referring to a lump in my left breast, which I now need to get checked out. FML

#7544484
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32238) - you deserved it (4168)

On 01/24/2010 at 1:12pm - health - by LadyLump (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I missed my own surprise party because, having heard it being planned, I though it was going to be an intervention. FML

#13328394
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7866) - you deserved it (41277)

On 10/05/2010 at 10:36am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my mom asked me if I would be embarrassed if she got a tramp stamp. FML

#7651599
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29135) - you deserved it (2447)

On 01/28/2010 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the neck while she was cooking on the stove. Apparently I scared her and now I have a nice burn mark on my head from the hot frying pan she hit me with. FML

#13692696
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24527) - you deserved it (9055)

On 11/02/2010 at 8:57pm - misc - by StayPositive - United States (Maine)

Today, I managed to not think too much about how alone I feel living in a strange city, and I went out to find a quiet place to write and eat. After I ordered my meal, I saw that I was the only diner that was sitting alone at a table. Then 'All By Myself' came on the radio. FML

#14040843
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32734) - you deserved it (3333)

On 11/30/2010 at 9:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - Italy

Today, I went to the new gym I recently signed up for and started exercising in the men-filled weights room, despite being intimidated by them and the strange looks they were giving me. Workout over, I left the room and saw in front of me a door marked "Women's weights room". Oh. FML

#13868959
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12305) - you deserved it (24620)

On 11/16/2010 at 8:21pm - misc - by genderbender (woman) - Reserved

Today, my kitchen sink was clogged. I poured a bottle of Drano down and came back two hours later. The clog is still there, but the glue on the pipe is not and now there is Drano-water all over the floor, staining and dissolving everything in my kitchen. FML

#10615901
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23727) - you deserved it (6625)

On 05/18/2010 at 9:23pm - misc - by MisterT (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to use my epilator on my eyebrows. Needless to say I now have the eyebrow equivalent of a comb-over. FML

#13389491
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5681) - you deserved it (23803)

On 10/10/2010 at 5:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I picked up a penny off the street for good luck on my job interview. A few seconds later, a hobo beat me up, took my wallet, and ran off. The whole ordeal made me late for the interview. So much for good luck. FML

#12524793
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26673) - you deserved it (3364)

On 08/14/2010 at 7:10pm - work - by hobosarea-holes (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was applying some acne ointment. The directions said, "Apply a thin layer, covering the entire affected area." In other words, for me: My entire face. Lovely. FML

#8988436
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21752) - you deserved it (3800)

On 03/11/2010 at 12:04am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, after a two week holiday, I'm returning to work exhausted. I had nightmares about work every single night. FML

#14444191
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22324) - you deserved it (3341)

On 01/02/2011 at 9:58pm - work - by sleepy (woman) - Norway

Today, mine and my boyfriend's concerns that we are too loud in bed were definitely confirmed when his entire family stopped the movie they were watching and vacated the cinema room located directly below us. They returned and resumed a while after we were finished. FML

#12622107
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7489) - you deserved it (32393)

On 08/19/2010 at 7:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had to confront my boyfriend after finding a girl's phone number next to my bed. He said I was over reacting. When I told him it was over, he asked for the number back so he could call her. FML

#12748715
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31400) - you deserved it (8631)

On 08/26/2010 at 12:11am - love - by tj - United States



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