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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, a cute girl came up to me with her boyfriend and said, "If you end up looking like him, it's over." FML

#13633879
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25547) - you deserved it (2480)

On 10/29/2010 at 12:33am - misc - by nonexistant (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I wanted to send a birthday card. I kindly asked my boss for an envelope, and she asked me to pay for it. I've been working for her as an intern for over a year now, without receiving any money for it. FML

#14140329
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24059) - you deserved it (3701)

On 12/09/2010 at 7:19am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, a woman laughed after hearing my voice for the first time. This happens whenever I meet someone new, without fail. FML

#14022149
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28440) - you deserved it (2775)

On 11/29/2010 at 9:22am - misc - by Username -

Today, it was my first day as a promoted manager. I got fired for being late. FML

#14242813
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9443) - you deserved it (36893)

On 12/18/2010 at 1:03am - work - by Pouya - United States

Today, I found a schedule in my dorm room that I share with three other guys. Looking at it closer I realized it was my schedule with notes written in all around it. My roommates have planned their entire days around mine so we won't have any interaction at all. I thought we got along great. FML

#14075452
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22292) - you deserved it (3459)

On 12/03/2010 at 8:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my Grandmother gave me rosary beads for my birthday. She told me I better start praying for a husband. FML

#13135872
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24149) - you deserved it (2693)

On 09/20/2010 at 11:02pm - misc - by kdgirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after months of her begging me, I let my girlfriend cut my hair for the first time. It turned out so badly that we are now "taking a break until it looks normal again." FML

#14338674
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26557) - you deserved it (5332)

On 12/25/2010 at 8:38pm - misc - by badhairday (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, while putting a drip in the back of an elderly patient's hand, he commented that he didn't realise doctors had pierced nipples, but not to worry because he's only in the hospital "for the b*tches". FML

#14397838
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23152) - you deserved it (5151)

On 12/30/2010 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML

#14413679
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25493) - you deserved it (5737)

On 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm - misc - by edulover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had a job interview. The interviewer asked me to give 5 adjectives describing myself. I listed 7. The last one being "listener." FML

#14456122
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6341) - you deserved it (31923)

On 01/03/2011 at 10:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I put aftershave on my fingers to encourage myself to stop biting my nails. I absentmindedly rubbed my eye a few minutes later. It burnt like hell. FML

#15102552
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11190) - you deserved it (31602)

On 02/24/2011 at 2:32pm - health - by Steve - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing with my pet rabbit when my boyfriend discovered poop on his lap. As he brushed it off, I reminded him that there are a lot worse things in the world than rabbit poop. Almost as if on cue, my rabbit peed on both of us. FML

#14497989
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11707) - you deserved it (18396)

On 01/07/2011 at 3:22pm - misc - by RabbitOwner - United States

Today, I was driving when I saw a spider hanging from the ceiling of my car. I'm terrified of spiders, so I was watching it instead the road. When I looked back at the road, I had just enough time to swerve to miss the fire hydrant but not the tree. Even the cop laughed at me. FML

#14552215
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10534) - you deserved it (27620)

On 01/12/2011 at 8:29am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)



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