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Today, I was in a nightclub with my girlfriend when a beautiful woman looked at me in the most provocative way. I didn't want to upset my girlfriend, so I escaped to the bar. When I came back, I saw the same girl making out with my girlfriend. Maybe I wasn't the one she was looking at. FML

#202
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53601) - you deserved it (8026)

On 11/03/2008 at 11:16pm - love - by clubber - Switzerland (Fribourg)

Today, I learnt that the girl with who I've being going out for 6 months, has been sleeping with every guy around except one. Guess who? FML

#379
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36747) - you deserved it (3076)

On 11/24/2008 at 1:08am - love - by lectro - Sent from mobile version

Today, my partner and I were informed by the man we had a three-way with, the first one after having finally screwed up the courage to do it, that he has mono. I don't feel so good. FML

#1345
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9646) - you deserved it (33034)

On 01/16/2009 at 8:36am - intimacy - by fd - United States (Alabama)

Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML

#23513
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13109) - you deserved it (29391)

On 02/11/2009 at 12:30am - misc - by tylerlove361 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I lost 200 dollars while playing poker with my new sunglasses. Turns out you can see the cards in the reflection. FML

#52319
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11887) - you deserved it (72204)

On 02/16/2009 at 10:25am - misc - by jwz (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, a customer opened with "you open bottles with them thangs?" I look around my desk for something he might confuse with an actual bottle opener. His girlfriend then informs me he is talking about my breasts. I work for a bank. FML

#176117
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42198) - you deserved it (3523)

On 03/01/2009 at 9:31pm - work - by bottlepoppin (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my dad and a construction worker were having a long talk. I heard the door slam, and assumed that this worker had left. So I yelled out "Hey dad what were you talking about? Did you talk slowly so the idiot could understand?" Turns out my dad was the one who had walked out. FML

#219438
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6075) - you deserved it (59745)

On 03/05/2009 at 6:26pm - misc - by anashaalmajiid (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my little nieces and nephews were about to have a water balloon fight. I was told to take pictures. They hit me. And my $600 camera. FML

Today, I emailed the guy I like to ask him on a coffee date. He responded, declining by telling me he never drinks coffee. We met at Starbucks. FML

#257838
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56191) - you deserved it (3609)

On 03/10/2009 at 12:20am - love - by nononame (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my little 7 year old brother asked me what horny meant whilst in the car with my parents. When I wouldn't tell him what it meant he screamed, "I'm getting horny!" at the top of his lungs, and told my parents that I told him to say it. FML

#525590
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61146) - you deserved it (6533)

On 03/21/2009 at 11:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having a dream that I was climbing out of a well. While almost out, I felt someone grab my knee; I screamed loud in terror. When I opened my eyes, nearly 25 people were staring at me. The lady across from me apologized for hitting me with her bag. I was on the C-train. FML

#1050390
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41544) - you deserved it (6646)

On 04/17/2009 at 7:47am - misc - by bluemonday - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was having a garage sale and my mother-in-law came by to see what I was selling. She decided to buy these ugly green wine glasses that were still unopened. It turns out that she gave those to my wife and I when we got married. FML

#2775360
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16026) - you deserved it (38856)

On 06/10/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on a blind date a girl from work had set me up with. Apparently my co-worker thinks I'm gay. FML

#3292838
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45098) - you deserved it (4019)

On 06/28/2009 at 12:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)



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