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Today, I handed in an assignment in health class that had to calculate my BMI. Embarassed by my weight I put it 15 pounds less. I got the assignment back and lost credit for something. Circled in red pen on the top was you must put your "EXACT" weight. FML

#92098
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38040) - you deserved it (16135)

On 02/20/2009 at 9:49pm - work - by ohh jeez. - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I stayed home, sick in bed. I had been sleeping on my arms. I got up quickly to grab the phone. My numb left arm rocketed and punched me in the (now cut) lip, which threw me off balance, making me smash my (now bloody) nose off of the headboard. It was a telemarketer. FML

#123831
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48700) - you deserved it (5471)

On 02/24/2009 at 3:34pm - health - by Sick (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was with my family at a buffet getting dessert. As I had my chocolate cake in hand, I grabbed an extra slice of cheesecake for my mom because I knew she would like a slice. Upon returning to my table, a couple walking behind me commented, "See, that's why Americans are so obese." FML

#249952
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46874) - you deserved it (8368)

On 03/09/2009 at 4:25am - misc - by McChunky =( - United States (California)

Today, I got a phone call from a detective in response to my stolen car that has been missing since St. Patrick's Day. He told me that he had found my car, but was chuckling the whole time. Turns out, I had parked my car in a different lot. I haven't had it for a week. It was never stolen. FML

#555809
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13477) - you deserved it (86131)

On 03/23/2009 at 4:37pm - misc - by Blondie (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was giving a presentation to a group of high school kids about how being 'cool' wasn't as important as they might think. When I was done I asked for questions. A kid says, "Miss, I get that you're not into being cool, but you're wearing your pants inside out.' He was right. FML

#1148346
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40700) - you deserved it (23147)

On 04/20/2009 at 8:21am - misc - by indi1011 (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found some oversized-strawberry-spree candies in my pantry. They were delicious and I munched on them through out the day. I ended up in and out, but mostly in, the bathroom in the dead hours of the night experiencing the wonders and effectiveness of Fruit Flavored Fiber pills. FML

#2367025
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12639) - you deserved it (42421)

On 05/28/2009 at 3:14am - health - by KKimrae_ness (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took my iPod to Walmart to replace the battery. They tell me to call Apple. I go home again and call Apple. They tell me to call Walmart. I call Walmart. They tell me to bring it in. FML

#13539571
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29675) - you deserved it (3515)

On 10/21/2010 at 6:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, for the first time in over a year, my mother actually called me. I excitedly picked up the phone. All I heard was rustling; her purse dialed me. FML

#2851443
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48850) - you deserved it (2768)

On 06/13/2009 at 3:10am - love - by slukaa (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth out. Due to the drugs they gave me I felt nauseous. When I went to the bathroom as a precaution I did not throw up. Instead I passed out face first in the toilet. FML

#1847078
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42197) - you deserved it (2625)

On 05/11/2009 at 4:37pm - health - by anon (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years sent me a text messages saying, "Don't worry I'm gonna break up with her soon. Love you." FML

#10627
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62344) - you deserved it (2636)

On 02/05/2009 at 5:29pm - misc - by nycgirl424 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I stood by the wall at a party while everyone else danced and ignored me. It was my birthday party. FML

#44996
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54435) - you deserved it (10170)

On 02/15/2009 at 12:44am - misc - by Noname - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted me to be her first and last...with plenty of people in between. FML

#102962
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64965) - you deserved it (5162)

On 02/22/2009 at 10:10am - intimacy - by Charles (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I told my boyfriend "we need to talk". He said "i know". So we met after school, and he said he was ok with me breaking up with him, that he wasn't that into me either. He said all that before I could tell him that my parents wanted to meet him. FML

#318032
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66990) - you deserved it (9814)

On 03/14/2009 at 5:46am - love - by knee2tak (woman) - United States (California)



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