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Today, I realized my family is the textbook definition of redneck after listening to my grandpa threaten to smash with an excavator the trailer that my uncle lives in behind our house if he didn't return the set of tires he had stolen and pawned from my grandpa's garage. FML

#20683275
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36060) - you deserved it (3385)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:06am - misc - by redneckfamily - United States (Washington)

Today, my mother came into my workplace to wail on me for "ruining our family's reputation" because I got a girl pregnant. I've been married to the "girl" for 8 years. FML

#20720453
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58850) - you deserved it (2902)

On 06/11/2013 at 10:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I got a concussion and several staples in my head. As it turns out, watering flowers is much more dangerous than it might sound. FML

#20716424
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36649) - you deserved it (7108)

On 06/09/2013 at 10:27pm - health - by Sean - United States

Today, I was in the bathroom at work when I ran out of toilet paper. There was another guy in the restroom so I asked him if he could hand me a roll. He laughed, called me a dumbass, turned off the lights and walked out. FML

#20717345
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50206) - you deserved it (5636)

On 06/10/2013 at 11:55am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in a while. I was doing upper body workouts and decided to ask a very large man to spot me while I did bench presses. As he stood over me, I saw two beads of sweat roll off his nose. One hit me on the cheek. The other landed in my open mouth. FML

#20709141
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45397) - you deserved it (7948)

On 06/06/2013 at 4:49am - misc - by dollabill009 - United States

Today, I was going to set up my air conditioner in the window. As I opened up the window, I must have disturbed a wasp nest, because a dozen wasps flew in and several of them stung me. The rest are now somewhere in my house with my terrified girlfriend. FML

#20748461
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41675) - you deserved it (3737)

On 06/26/2013 at 1:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after playing numerous games of poker against my friend, and him telling me that I'm the best poker player he's ever met, I went out and played for real money. I got totally destroyed, lost all of my money, and was laughed out of the building. FML

#20767127
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22770) - you deserved it (45282)

On 07/06/2013 at 2:23pm - money - by goodbye sweet internet (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I told the guy I liked about my crush on him. He said he would keep me in mind if he ever hits rock bottom. FML

#20786950
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47290) - you deserved it (3512)

On 07/16/2013 at 7:41pm - love - by hannahisacooler (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked to work. I later discovered that my husband had parked my car in a no-parking area. My job is towing cars. I had to tow my own car. FML

#20775203
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49610) - you deserved it (5138)

On 07/10/2013 at 11:04pm - work - by Anonymous -

Today, I took a run in the woods. Almost halfway through, I started to feel like I was going to faint. I was so dizzy that my sight was getting blurry. I went to sit down on what seemed like a rock. It wasn't a rock. It was a huge snapping turtle. FML

#20812086
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49176) - you deserved it (5463)

On 07/30/2013 at 7:19pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, while relaxing in a chair in a shop, a man approached me and said, "You have no idea how many times I've farted in that chair." FML

#20797188
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40903) - you deserved it (4245)

On 07/22/2013 at 7:49am - misc - by xXxXxTOBIxX (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, a guest of the private beach club I work at asked if I could do something about the water temperature in the ocean. I laughed, thinking it was a joke. She was serious and complained to my boss, saying I was absolutely no help. FML

#20837266
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43146) - you deserved it (2667)

On 08/14/2013 at 3:47pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I received a phone call that started with, "Now stay calm... Your house is on fire." FML

#20834558
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47449) - you deserved it (2556)

On 08/12/2013 at 10:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)



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