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Today, I was very sick with a stomach virus, so I went to the only doctor's office open on Sundays. Even though I was feeling like a pile of shit, I waited for a woman who was walking in behind me to hold the door open for her. She was the last patient they could take for the day. FML

#7270960
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28121) - you deserved it (2491)

On 01/11/2010 at 12:19am - health - by Gentleman (man) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I was wondering why my home smelled so weird, until I found out that my 4 year old son had been secretly scattering around food he didn't like to eat throughout the house. How did I find out? No one else in this family leaves half eaten spinach all over my underwear drawer. FML

#7254333
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20053) - you deserved it (3073)

On 01/10/2010 at 5:45am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after work, I peeled a parking ticket off my windshield. It was so hot that the ink from the ticket made a stamp on my windshield. Now I have a permanent reminder staring me in the face wherever I drive. FML

#12081632
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21016) - you deserved it (6745)

On 07/24/2010 at 5:49am - work - by wils (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that I can still do the splits. Why? Because I fell down an entire flight of stairs, everyone in the hall saw me land and applauded. Someone even shouted "and she sticks the landing." FML

#8965492
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20739) - you deserved it (3025)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:09am - misc - by misty_love (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I met my recently divorced mother's new boyfriend. He is missing teeth and has long hair and a mangy beard. Horrified, I left the room, only to hear my mother telling my sister, "The sex is phenomenal!" FML

#12550776
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27317) - you deserved it (2716)

On 08/16/2010 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my parents finally invited my boyfriend over for dinner. Everything was going great until my mother asked him his profession. He stuffed his mouth full of lasagna, snorted, and then responded, "I clean shit for a living." FML

#14256786
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13111) - you deserved it (20712)

On 12/19/2010 at 2:46am - love - by lovecrisis247 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me. She wants to try dating women. This is the second time this has happened to me. FML

#13857180
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38135) - you deserved it (5802)

On 11/15/2010 at 8:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to my parents' place to visit. My ex-boyfriend's photo is on the fridge, but there aren't any photos of my husband or any of our wedding photos. FML

#13167101
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27120) - you deserved it (2435)

On 09/23/2010 at 5:59am - misc - by annoyed - United States (California)

Today, I was helping my Dad pick up the pieces of bark that came off the tree that we'd just cut down. I bent over to grab a dark looking piece of bark. Turn out it was my dogs crap. Fresh, warm, moist piece of crap to be exact. FML

#13363790
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17707) - you deserved it (6217)

On 10/08/2010 at 8:08am - animals - by themanzz - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I did a quick load of laundry so I would have work clothes for the week. I don't have my own dryer so I dried them in the one in my building. After running out to my car, I came back to find that my neighborhood kids had added 6 sharpies to my clothes. Every uniform I own has stripes. FML

#12957316
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18244) - you deserved it (2439)

On 09/08/2010 at 12:05am - misc - by arose - United States

Today, my teacher started talking about me quietly to the stuffed cat, called Rufus, that she keeps on her desk. FML

#18763079
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19839) - you deserved it (1819)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:25am - work - by jumbledgirl (woman) - United States

Today, I was at a movie theater. I heard some obnoxious people talking in front of me. After about 5 minutes, I began throwing popcorn at a group of suspected people. As I was escorted out, I realized that the obnoxious people were in the background of the movie. FML

#13566172
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3965) - you deserved it (37579)

On 10/23/2010 at 7:14pm - misc - by escortedout (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at work, I was trying to repeat an order back to this guy, when his drunk girlfriend started to interrupt me. Whenever I would open my mouth, she would say "Blah blah blah." Literally. Eventually, I gave up. I got his order wrong, and got yelled at by my manager for not repeating his order. FML

#13456460
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20622) - you deserved it (2227)

On 10/15/2010 at 6:52am - work - by ziatenaj - United States (California)



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