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Today, I found a schedule in my dorm room that I share with three other guys. Looking at it closer I realized it was my schedule with notes written in all around it. My roommates have planned their entire days around mine so we won't have any interaction at all. I thought we got along great. FML

#14075452
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22271) - you deserved it (3457)

On 12/03/2010 at 8:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my Grandmother gave me rosary beads for my birthday. She told me I better start praying for a husband. FML

#13135872
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24133) - you deserved it (2691)

On 09/20/2010 at 11:02pm - misc - by kdgirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after months of her begging me, I let my girlfriend cut my hair for the first time. It turned out so badly that we are now "taking a break until it looks normal again." FML

#14338674
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26538) - you deserved it (5331)

On 12/25/2010 at 8:38pm - misc - by badhairday (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, while putting a drip in the back of an elderly patient's hand, he commented that he didn't realise doctors had pierced nipples, but not to worry because he's only in the hospital "for the b*tches". FML

#14397838
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23123) - you deserved it (5149)

On 12/30/2010 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML

#14413679
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25476) - you deserved it (5735)

On 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm - misc - by edulover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had a job interview. The interviewer asked me to give 5 adjectives describing myself. I listed 7. The last one being "listener." FML

#14456122
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6339) - you deserved it (31902)

On 01/03/2011 at 10:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I put aftershave on my fingers to encourage myself to stop biting my nails. I absentmindedly rubbed my eye a few minutes later. It burnt like hell. FML

#15102552
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11181) - you deserved it (31585)

On 02/24/2011 at 2:32pm - health - by Steve - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing with my pet rabbit when my boyfriend discovered poop on his lap. As he brushed it off, I reminded him that there are a lot worse things in the world than rabbit poop. Almost as if on cue, my rabbit peed on both of us. FML

#14497989
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11689) - you deserved it (18386)

On 01/07/2011 at 3:22pm - misc - by RabbitOwner - United States

Today, I was driving when I saw a spider hanging from the ceiling of my car. I'm terrified of spiders, so I was watching it instead the road. When I looked back at the road, I had just enough time to swerve to miss the fire hydrant but not the tree. Even the cop laughed at me. FML

#14552215
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10528) - you deserved it (27598)

On 01/12/2011 at 8:29am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my power went out due to a huge snow storm. I was in desperate need of candles and flashlights. I had to walk to the store since the roads were closed. I walked 4 miles in the blizzard. When I got home, the power came back on. FML

#14727307
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25594) - you deserved it (7556)

On 01/27/2011 at 12:11am - misc - by iamlauraheremecry (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my sister and I had a bonding moment. It consisted of me plucking her chin hairs. FML

#15083681
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20224) - you deserved it (5097)

On 02/22/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by Taylor (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was supposed to go on a date. I have been playing solitaire the whole night waiting for him. Out of 15 games, I've won one. FML

#16842915
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29146) - you deserved it (4529)

On 06/25/2011 at 12:30am - love - by yourmomsabitch (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was driving when I saw someone pulled over on the side of the road. Wanting to help, I pulled over. In so doing, I ran over a nail, which popped my tire. The guy had just pulled over to pee. FML

#17973264
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24427) - you deserved it (5709)

On 10/13/2011 at 3:27am - misc - by happyshit (woman) - United States (Arizona)



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