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Today, my boss is still refusing to hire any more people because he's convinced I can handle all of the work after the majority of staff quit. FML

#21217678
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38162) - you deserved it (2998)

On 07/22/2014 at 8:51pm - work - by Inthedumps (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend came over to my place, looking drop dead gorgeous. However, she preferred the idea of sleeping, and here I am on my laptop. FML

#41
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42983) - you deserved it (9000)

On 10/25/2008 at 12:56pm - love - by Crawling -

Today, I was in a nightclub with my girlfriend when a beautiful woman looked at me in the most provocative way. I didn't want to upset my girlfriend, so I escaped to the bar. When I came back, I saw the same girl making out with my girlfriend. Maybe I wasn't the one she was looking at. FML

#202
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53409) - you deserved it (8010)

On 11/03/2008 at 11:16pm - love - by clubber - Switzerland (Fribourg)

Today, I went onto my computer and found a cyber sex conversation between my sister and my girlfriend. FML

#768
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32959) - you deserved it (2527)

On 12/31/2008 at 10:49pm - intimacy - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, the only girl I really loved said to me: I want you to be the father of my child, but I don't want to be your girlfriend. FML

#1230
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25295) - you deserved it (1650)

On 01/15/2009 at 11:12am - love - by J.Smith - Sent from mobile version

Today, I am studying abroad in Mexico and someone asked me what it's like to be from Minnesota. I responded in Spanish, in front of thirty people, what I thought translated to, "If you get cold, you can just put on a jacket." Apparently, what I thought meant "jacket" actually meant "masturbate". FML

#2562
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17142) - you deserved it (4400)

On 01/25/2009 at 7:06pm - misc - by Sally - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML

#2727
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25883) - you deserved it (2594)

On 01/26/2009 at 6:44pm - misc - by glittercat - United States (Missouri)

Today, I made my new girlfriend orgasm for the first time. All she said after was "I drooled a little". FML

#4642
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32677) - you deserved it (5141)

On 02/01/2009 at 10:48am - intimacy - by nicknack22 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got up at 5am, brushed my teeth, shaved and showered to get ready for work only to step barefoot in a huge pile of dog crap in the middle of my living room floor. I don't own a dog. FML

#7193
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38459) - you deserved it (1882)

On 02/04/2009 at 2:53am - animals - by RustyBulletHole - United States (Illinois)

Today, I handed in an assignment in health class that had to calculate my BMI. Embarassed by my weight I put it 15 pounds less. I got the assignment back and lost credit for something. Circled in red pen on the top was you must put your "EXACT" weight. FML

#92098
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37795) - you deserved it (16017)

On 02/20/2009 at 9:49pm - work - by ohh jeez. - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I fell out of the shower. It was still on. Bracing my fall, I reached into the toilet. It wasn't flushed. FML

#151604
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42841) - you deserved it (13423)

On 02/27/2009 at 10:18am - misc - by Ackbar (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was laying with my girlfriend on the couch. I looked at her and says "You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." FML

#185266
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57978) - you deserved it (10063)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:26pm - love - by ak (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, at 4:00 a.m., I woke up and realized that I had thrown an expensive gift certificate for a friend in the garbage. Since it was garbage day, I ran out in the rain in my pajamas and rifled through all three bags of garbage. Twice. I found the gift certificate. It was in my pocket. FML

#469671
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24741) - you deserved it (54058)

On 03/19/2009 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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