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Today, I received the first compliment from the opposite sex that I've gotten in months, from an elderly, cross-dressing man in the parking lot of Goodwill. Apparently my clothes look like they'd be "exciting to try on." FML
Today, I went tanning for 15 min at my gym. When I got out no one was there, all of the lights were off, and the alarm started going off. Turns out the people working forgot about me, locked up, and left me there. FML
Today, I was driving my drunk mother home when my phone rang. It was my boyfriend, so I asked her to answer the call. My mother then questioned him on our sex life and was especially interested to know if we'd used handcuffs because I "like them." I have no recollection of ever telling her this. FML
Friday 14 March 2014